Harry Potter and the Year of Broken Chains
by BolshevikMuppet99
Summary: Book 3 of the Downward Spiral Saga: Sequel to HP and Salazar's Legacy. Given the choice to join Lord Voldemort, what will Harry do? Meanwhile, couples begin forming in the Slytherin dorm, and a deranged killer is on the loose. Dark!Harry, Slytherin!Harry. Sequel is up. HP and the Return of the Lost
1. Prologue

**WELCOME TO BOOK 3 OF THE SAGA OF HARRY POTTER.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE RIGHTS TO HARRY POTTER, OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS, NAMES, LOCATIONS, ETC. I MAKE NO MONEY OFF THIS. THOSE RIGHTS BELONG TO JK ROWLING AND WARNER BROS.**

 **CONTENT WARNINGS: FIRSTLY, FOR A BUNCHA REASONS, I WILL NOT BE POSTING WARNINGS ON INDIVIDUAL CHAPTERS. IF YOU FEEL YOU NEED THOSE WARNINGS, P.M. ME BUT KNOW THAT FROM THIS BOOK ON, THE STORY AS A WHOLE IS GOING TO GET INCREDIBLY DARK AND INTENSE.**

 **THIS BOOK (AND IT'S SEQUELS) WILL CONTAIN: MEMORIES, MENTION, AND DISCUSSION OF CHILD ABUSE (GRAPHIC SEXUAL, PHYSICAL, AND EMOTIONAL)  
**

 **TORTURE. GORE. MURDER. MENTION OF RAPE AND OTHER SEXUAL ABUSE. PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL VIOLENCE. FOUL LANGUAGE. DRUG ABUSE.**

 **PAIRINGS WILL BEGIN THIS YEAR. THEY WILL NOT BE FINAL UNTIL 5** **TH** **/6** **TH** **YEAR. HARRY WILL NOT BE IN A SLASH PAIR, AND DEFINITELY NOT WITH VOLDEMORT**

 **DUE TO UPCOMING CHANGES IN MY SCHEDULE, AS MUCH AS I WANT TO, I CAN NOT COMMIT TO A SET PACE. FROM NEXT WEEK ON, UNTIL I SETTLE INTO A ROUTINE, I WILL BASICALLY WRITE AS AND WHEN I CAN. THIS STORY IS NOT GETTING ABANDONED! I KNOW WHAT HAPPENS OVER THE COURSE OF THE REST OF THE SAGA, IM NOT STOPPING IN THE MIDDLE. JUST BEAR WITH ME IF IM NOT WRITING REGULARLY.**

 **PLEASE REVIEW OR P.M. ME. EVEN IF I DON'T RESPOND TO YOU REVIEW, I READ IT AND ENJOY EVERY ONE (UNLESS YOU'RE FLAMING). I WANT YOUR CRITICISM!  
**

 **I THINK THAT'S IT (NEXT THING YOU KNOW, THIS WILL BE LONGER THAN THE CHAPTER!)**

 **ENJOY!  
**

Prologue

Narcissa leaned against her husband's taut arm and wept.

"Draco, oh my Draco"

"Hush, Cissy"

"Don't hush me! How could you allow this to happen?"

"What would you have me do? Argue with him? It would only earn me a torturous death. His mind is set"

"Perhaps" she spoke softly, eyes darting around. Voice catching in her throat. She managed, "Perhaps Dumbledore could help" 

Her husband pulled her back until they were standing in the shadows. Soon the platform would fill up with families eagerly awaiting their children. Soon the platform would be crowded with people, and with noise. Soon the ground would shake as the train pulled in. But for now, it was quiet. Quiet and empty, save for the two. 

"Do not say such things" He hissed, "Do not even think such things"

"I didn't mean it" She sounded horrified. Perhaps, a watcher would be able to make out her hand going to cover her mouth. Perhaps not. They stood in the shadows. Hiding from the light.

"I didn't mean it" she repeated. "It's just. Our Draco. What if he doesn't please Him? What if?" And she started crying again, her words lost in a torrent.

"Sssssh, sssh Cissy" Her husband pulled her close to him. "Sssh. We are in public"

She gave a hiccoughing laugh.

"And we have raised Draco well. Besides, I believe His desire for Draco spawns more from a desire to punish us, and to pull Harry tighter to Him"

"Is it bad?" She whispered, "That I would gladly throw Harry to the wolves, throw Harry to Him, if it would mean Draco would be safe?"

His face was unreadable as he looked at her. "It is what any mother would do. But that is another thing you should not think. He desires Harry to serve Him. More than anything else"

And she continued to cry.

As someone else stepped on to the platform, she stopped crying as if a tap had been switched off. She waved her wand at her face, cleaning it, and stepped out of the shadows with her husband.

"Lucius. Narcissa"

They nodded to the newcomer.

"Thaddeus"

"Here for the boys?"

"What else?"

"Are they ready?" 

"They will be"

"For your sakes, I hope so"

"And what's that meant to mean?" Lucius said silkily. Thaddeus simply laughed.

"I don't mean to cause offense. But it is obvious that His wishes for thirteen-year-old boys are not merely due to their abilities. He's always had creative punishments" 

Lucius stepped closer, till he was inches away from his old friend.

"And?"

"Merlin, Lucius. I'm glad He didn't ask for Theo. I know he's not ready for that"

"Better me than you?"

"Always" Thaddeus roared with laughter. He slapped Lucius on the back, "Come now Lucius, it's not a funeral!

"We can only hope" Lucius muttered. Thaddeus always managed to break his composure.

Slowly, the platform filled with people. Narcissa looked at them all with envy in their eyes. ' _None of them have to graciously bring their only son to a man who would think nothing of tearing his skin off'_ she thought, with a shiver. She had seen the Dark Lord's fury before. She had no desire to even think of it in connection with Draco. 

As the train whistled in the distance, Lucius leaned into her and whispered. 

"You take Draco straight to Him. He wants to see him first. I'll find a way of keeping Harry occupied for a bit, then I'll bring him"

"Hogsmeade" Narcissa whispered back.

"What?"

"They need to get their Hogsmeade forms signed. Take him to the Muggles to do so. Find something to do in Gringotts"

He nodded slowly as the train pulled in.

For better or worse, his son would be meeting with the Dark Lord.

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	2. Chapter 1

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M ME**

 **ENJOY!  
**

Chapter 1

As usual, Lucius and Narcissa were waiting when the train pulled in at King's Cross Station. As Harry and Draco walked to them, pulling their trunks, broomsticks and Draco's owl behind them, Narcissa pulled Draco into a tight hug.

' _You'd think she hasn't seen him for years, instead of the few months it's actually been'_

Lucius meanwhile strode over to Harry and shook his hand.

"Had a good year, Harry?"

"So-so. Hoping next one will be better, to be honest"

Lucius merely shook his head, clucking his tongue.

"Are the fool's fan club really still bothering you?"

"Kinda. It's not just that, I'm just happy this year's over"

"Well, this should be a good, restful break"

Narcissa finally extracted herself from her son and came over to Harry.

"Harry. I'm so glad you will be spending the summer with us once again"

"Thanks, ma'am. Me too"

She looked at him with an unreadable expression and only moved her eyes a few seconds later.

"So, Lucius. I shall take Draco home now. You had something to take care of with Harry?"

"Correct. Harry, we need to go past your Muggle guardians"

"Ok. Apparition, right?"

"Of course. Do I look like a Muggle to you?"

"No, no, I just meant-"

Harry's sentence was cut off by the tell-tale crack of Apparition. Narcissa had gone, Draco with her.

"Harry, do you mind if we go past Diagon Alley after? Just a few things I must take care of at Gringotts"

"Whatever's easier for you, sir. I don't want to be an imposition or anything"?

"Wonderful. Grab hold, please"

And they were gone.

* * *

By the time they got back to Malfoy Manor, Harry was frankly exhausted. It had been really cool, the way Lucius had just given the Matron the Hogsmeade form to sign after tapping it with his wand. And she signed it! She looked like she couldn't focus on it properly, either. That was something Harry definitely wanted to learn. He didn't plan on spending much time in Muggle society, but still. It could definitely come in handy.

He had sniggered to himself, thinking of giving Binns a note saying nothing at all and the stupid ghost thinking it was a ten-inch essay.

Nevertheless, Harry had been traveling for hours, hadn't slept much the night before (after all, it had been the last night of the school year, and Slytherin had won the house cup), and then had to sit quietly while Lucius had a private meeting with a goblin manager.

After that, Lucius had to speak to Mr. Borgin. While looking around Borgin and Burke's would always be something exciting to do, and it definitely served to wake Harry up a bit, he was still dragging his feet like leaden weights by the time he and Lucius were standing outside Malfoy Manor's beautiful gates.

Lucius seemed to hesitate before the gates.

"Harry," he said, turning to face the boy, "There's-there's someone here who wants to meet with you"

Trying valiantly to hide a yawn, Harry said "Who?"

"That's a-a surprise. He wanted to meet with Draco and yourself. Individually"

Lucius' obvious nervousness started to rub off on Harry, and he asked "Sir? Am I in trouble?"

A shaky smile answered him. "No, not at all"

Somehow, Harry got the feeling that Lucius was lying to him.

"Just-If Draco's finished, just go straight through to the study. He'll be waiting for you"

An icy pit began to settle in Harry's stomach as he walked up the path to the Manor.

' _Who could it be? Lucius wouldn't put me in danger, would he?'_

And a sly voice screamed at him ' _Never trust!'_

When they walked through the main entrance, the Malfoy's elf was waiting.

"Mistress said Tufty should tell Master that Master Draco is finished. Master Harry can go through when he arrives"

Lucius nodded at the elf, and she disappeared.

"Go on, Harry. We shall speak, afterward"

* * *

Harry walked into the study, trepidation making his legs heavier. His fatigue had all but vanished. ' _Something weird is definitely going on'_

"Hello?" he said, feeling foolish. There was definitely someone there, sitting in Lucius throne-like chair, facing away from him. He couldn't make out more than a shape though, and the candles didn't help nearly enough.

"Harry Potter. We meet again". Something about that voice made Harry's hair stand on end. His instincts were screaming at him to run, but he didn't think he could face Lucius, or even Draco if he ran out of this room now.

"Uh. I don't mean to be rude-"

"But you wish to know who I am, and when we have met?"

There was cold amusement in the voice. It carried on.

"I thought I had made more of an impression. After all, I believe I was your favorite teacher in your first year"

Without even thinking, Harry blurted out-"Professor Quirrell?"

This time, the amusement wasn't hidden. The voice laughed, in a high pitch that turned Harry's stomach to a roiling pit of snakes.

"Almost. I was controlling Quirrell for most of your conversations with him, so that is not such an inaccurate moniker"

' _What. The. Fuck?'_

"This may come as a surprise to you, Harry. But I was possessing Quirrell. You barely knew the true Quirrell"

"Wh-Who are you?" He asked, voice dry

"I? I am Lord Voldemort. You may refer to me as My Lord"

Harry almost laughed. Would have, if not for Lucius' blatant fear. It made sense. Horrible, terrifying sense.

"What" He tried again, "What do you want?"

"I do not wish to harm you if that is your fear. I merely wish to speak with you. Come. Sit"

It wasn't a request. Harry sank into the freshly conjured armchair (Not as large, or as elaborate as the one Voldemort was sitting on). For once in his life, his mind was totally blank. He tried to think, but his brain seemed to short-circuit whenever he got to the fact that he was sitting opposite the fucking Dark Lord.

He felt the man's eyes piercing him.

' _Say something!'_

"I-"

"I merely wish to speak" Voldemort repeated. "Breath in"

Harry did. The order had been given in a tone that demanded to be obeyed.

He slowly let out a breath, as Voldemort began to talk.

"I wish to give you an offer. Harry Potter, I offer you to join me"

"Why?"

Harry didn't realize he had spoken aloud until he heard the echo of his word. He closed his eyes, waiting for the explosion, but Voldemort merely chuckled.

"Come now, Harry. I remember you being far more descriptive as that. Ask your question again"

"Why me? You tried to kill me, and now you want me to join you? You killed my parents" By the end, Harry's voice had sunk till it was almost unrecognizable as English.

"Why indeed".

"I feel a kinship to you. We are both Half-Bloods. We are both Parselmouths. We were both sorted into the noble house of my ancestor. We were both orphaned at a young age. We were both raised in a Muggle orphanage"

Harry took in breath sharply at that. ' _The Dark Lord is a Half-Blood? Was raised in an orphanage?'_

Voldemort noticed Harry's shock. "Oh yes. I understand. Perhaps better than any other wizard could. I understand what it is like to be hated as a child. To be feared for something beyond your control. Something you cannot even understand. I know what it is to lie in bed, alone and wish you just were like the others. To wish you were normal. And to finally find yourself a place in your world. And to know that this all could have been prevented"

Harry just stared.

"And so, Harry. I understand you. And as Quirrell, I saw something in you. Potential for true greatness. I offer you the chance to take your greatness. The greatness that is your birthright"

"You killed my parents" Harry whispered, voice shaking.

"So I did. I regret it, as I regret every drop of magical blood I spilled and will spill"

"It's your fault I ended up in that place"

Voldemort just looked at him.

"Is it? I killed your parents, as I killed those who fought against me in battle. It is unfortunate that collateral damage occurred, and it was never my goal. But in war, such things are unavoidable. I killed them and would have killed you. I did not choose to send you to live amongst muggles"

"It still is because of you" Harry was lucky that he wasn't stopping to think. If he did, he would have been too terrified to say the things he was saying.

"In part. Did you know, Harry that I attempted to have a law passed that would ensure that no magical child would be left to Muggles? That Dumbledore fought against this law"

"I've heard of the law"

"Did I drop you off at the home of a magic-hating family of Muggles? Or was that Dumbledore"

Harry could barely say the whole sentence. "Dumbledore"

"Is it fair, Harry, to blame me in full, when I was only part of the cause?"

"Life isn't fair" He muttered. He lifted his eyes to meet Voldemort's glowing red pinpoints. "How can I join you, when you killed my parents?"

Voldemort was silent for a few moments.

"Tell me, Harry. What is it you wish for, most of all?"

Harry didn't say anything.

"Come now, Harry. When I was Quirrell, we discussed this. You were far more verbose then. Do you remember your answer?"

Harry closed his eyes. He could picture the scene in question. He was sitting opposite Quirrell's desk. They had been talking about the difference in wand movements between the Leg-Locker and the Full Body-Bind. Quirrell had suddenly asked the question, and Harry had answered-

"Power," he said softly, opening his eyes.

"Exactly. Tell me, Harry. Where are you more likely to amass all the power you could, with me, or with Dumbledore? You know I would never forbid magic. If you are capable of casting it, then the choice is yours. You know Dumbledore does not think like that"

' _He's right'_

"I would train you myself," Voldemort said, moving his head closer to Harry. "You would be my protégé. You have the skills and the mind. Think of it. All of the magic, open to you. I can tell you about magical arts so ancient, they have been forgotten centuries ago. I can give you the power you could find nowhere else"

"But you-"

"Yes. I did. Are you going to live your life, based on your feelings for people you never knew? Is that how you wish to live? Always wondering, how would my parents react? Never knowing if your decision is true? Or will you live for yourself?"

Harry couldn't answer.

"Don't you want revenge?" came Voldemort's whisper. "I burnt down the orphanage I grew up. It was extremely cathartic. Don't you want to see them pay? Pay for what they dared to do to you? Don't you want to see the whole system pay? The foolish witches and wizards who squander their gifts, and worry more about appeasing the talentless rather than enriching their own lives? Those who worry about the morality of magic, instead of simply using it?

With me, you can achieve revenge. You can avenge yourself against those Muggles who made your childhood a nightmare, and who stood by and allowed it to happen"

Harry tried to say something. The words caught in his throat.

"By my side, Harry, you will always be accepted. You will never have to fit a mould to be one of us. Simply swear to me, and you will be part of a brotherhood that nothing can tear apart."

Harry still couldn't say anything.

"No longer will you have to be alone. You will be a part of something, much greater than yourself. But you will not be a cog in the machine, forgotten. You will be important, befriended"

"I have friends" Harry managed.

"And if you reject my offer, how much longer will you retain those friendships for?"

' _Oh shit. Draco'_

"Your friend Draco has already agreed to join my service. His parents are a part of it, as is Thaddeus Nott. Crabbe, Goyle, Parkinson. All these names are names of my servants. Chiara Zabini has long been one of my best political and financial supporters, as have Ian and Lauren Greengrass. Your Head of House, Severus Snape, is bound to me by far more than words. Tell me, Harry. Can you really cast them all aside?"

Harry felt like his heart was shattering into a thousand pieces. And still, the Dark Lord went on.

"It will only be a matter of years until all your friends have sworn to me. What then? From what I recall as Quirrell, you did not get along very well with Dumbledore's crowd. Weasley, Longbottom. Would they welcome you with open arms? There is no neutrality in this coming war. Definitely not for you. Your choice is with me, or with Dumbledore. Or crushed in between, attacked and hated from both sides. Alone"

Harry just wished the man would stop. He wanted to run. He didn't want this to be happening. He wanted to wake up.

"On the one side, you have Albus Dumbledore. Champion of Muggles, lover of Gryffindors. The man who admits to neglecting you amongst a horde of Muggles as they visited horrors upon you. The man who would bar you from studying all that you wish, because it goes against his preconceived ideas of morality. On the other side, you have me, and all I have to offer. Harry Potter. Choose"

Harry looked at the man before him. Something screamed inside his head as he came to his decision. Red eyes boring into his very soul, Harry Potter chose.

"I'll join you" He whispered, unshed tears filling his eyes.

The Dark Lord smiled.

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	3. Chapter 2

**AN: I OWN NOTHING.**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 2

Harry went up to his room after his meeting. He opened his door, and Draco jumped off his bed.

"Tell me you said yes" He demanded

Harry looked at him and nodded slowly. His adrenalin was wearing off, and he just wanted to collapse.

"Oh, thank God," Draco said, hugging Harry. "I was afraid you'd-that he'd-"

"Did you know? That he was waiting for us?"

"Not till I arrived home. I think my parents were afraid I'd say something"

"And were we wrong?"

Harry and Draco spun around. Lucius and Narcissa were standing at the bedroom door.

"I-"

"Hush, Draco. We were told to keep it secret until you were actually here. We obeyed"

"Yes, sir," Draco said, abashed.

"Now boys, you should get to bed. I believe He will desire your presence tomorrow"

As the parents left the room, Lucius popped his head back in.

"I don't think it needs to be said that no-one is to know about this?"

"No, sir," They both said, shaking their heads.

"Good. Get some sleep"

* * *

It was different in Malfoy Manor with the Dark Lord there. He didn't join everyone for meals, preferring Tufty to bring him food in the library or study. That was when he was around. He was often away, on one errand or another. No-one dared ask what exactly he was doing. If they were meant to know, they would.

As Lucius had predicted, the day after their meetings with him, the Dark Lord sent Tufty to bring Harry and Draco to the East Ballroom. There, they found him sitting on another throne-like chair, with some simpler wooden chairs a few feet in front of him.

"Sit" He ordered, and they did, barely meeting his eyes.

"You have agreed to serve me, and that is admirable. You will be the youngest ever to join the Death Eaters. This alone would be enough to grant you prestige and respect the likes of which few others know of. More than that, you have been handpicked by me. This is not usual"

He stood up in a swift movement, long limbs straightening.

"Nevertheless, you will be expected to prove your worth. You will not embarrass me. Will you?"

"No, My Lord," They both said, looking down.

"And so, you must be prepared for your initiation. Upon your return to Hogwarts, Severus will be training you. I understand you have a habit of practicing spells and dueling?"

They nodded.

"Good. You will be joined by Severus. He will teach you to do me proud. To show why I chose you. You will work hard, and train, and learn. He is not teaching children, but fledgling warriors"

He stopped his pacing directly before the two boys.

"Which brings us to our current topic. Your initiation. The chance for you to show the rest of your companions why you deserve their respect. Why you are fit to serve me"

"You will be demonstrating your willingness to ignore the decrees of the Ministry. To ignore the shackles they dare to place on Magic"

"What will we actually do?" Harry said, belatedly adding "My Lord" when Voldemort's head snapped in his direction.

Voldemort gave him a grim smile. "You will be casting the Cruciatus. And the Killing Curse"

Harry felt like throwing up. ' _Haven't I killed enough?'_

' _You knew this is what it would mean when you said you'd join. You really think he'll be so happy if you just decide you're backing out now?'_

"On Muggles, of course," The Dark Lord continued. "In fact, Harry. If you wish, there can be specific Muggles"

' _I've already killed the ones I wanted to. Although, there still are one or two-'_

' _ARE YOU SERIOUSLY THINKING ABOUT THIS? AFTER ALL THE SHIT YOU FELT FOR YEARS? SINCE JOSEPH-'_

"Regardless, you will learn to cast these spells before then. I hope you will learn to cast them before returning to Hogwarts. You do not wish to disappoint me, do you?"

"No, My Lord"

"You will find that these curses are quite unlike anything the Ministry" he sneered at the word, "deems appropriate to teach you. They require the input of your emotions"

He conjured a rabbit with a wave of his wand.

"Look at it," he told the boys, voice soft, welcoming. "Think of the person you hate most. The worst thing they ever did, that caused you to hate them. Focus on that. Imagine they are this rabbit. Feel the hate, the rage. Feel the desire to cause them pain"

At first, Harry simply imposed Joseph's face onto the rabbit. He forced himself to remember the things the boy had done to him, the things he had said. How he had been forced to spend years with no friends. He was getting angry, he could definitely feel the hate. But it just wasn't enough.

Almost without trying, a different memory popped into his head.

' _He was nine years old. The hand gripping his hair pulled tight as his head was pushed forward. The back of his throat was being rubbed, and he barely managed to hold back from vomiting. He didn't want to do that again. He still had welts from the last time he had vomited, and it was ages ago. The hand's owner was groaning, and without warning, a thick foul liquid was spraying into his mouth. His head was pulled back, off the groaning man, and his cheek was lightly slapped. "You're getting good at that. Lucky, it's all you'll be good it. Remember, if you tell anyone they'll all know what a disgusting little slut you are'  
_

"There is no wand movement required," The Dark Lord said, pointing his wand at the rabbit. "Merely the intention and enunciation. Like so- Crucio!"

A jet of red light shot from his wand, and the rabbit was shaking, twitching. It was making a strange, mewling sound too. Harry and Draco watched, in horrified fascination.

"Are you prepared?" he said, lifting his wand.

They both nodded.

"Harry, the stage is yours". The Dark Lord's lips were twisted in a sardonic grin, as Harry thought of Mr. Roberts. Imagined his face on the rabbit.

"Crucio," He said, voice trembling.

As the rabbit twitched, so did Harry. But he was feeling almost overpowering pleasure. It was one of the best things he had ever experienced. It blotted out all thoughts except one.

' _I never want this to end'_

"Remove the curse," Voldemort said, cruel laughter bubbling below his words.

Harry lowered his wand, panting.

' _That was- fucking amazing'_

"Well done, Harry," Voldemort said, giving him a warm smile. "Most wizards your age would not manage it on their first attempt"

He turned his head to Draco. "Your chance"

Draco took a deep breath. "Crucio" He intoned.

A very pale jet of light hit the rabbit, which barely moved.

"Not quite. Focus your hatred. Focus it all until you feel nothing but the desire to inflict pain."

Draco's eyes were closed tightly, his face intent.

"Try again"

"Crucio"

Again, the spell hit the rabbit. Again, the rabbit was barely affected.

"Focus it all" Voldemort's voice was low, silky. "Put all your hatred and rage onto a face. Show me why you deserve to serve me. Cast the spell"

"Crucio"

The rabbit twitched much more than it had before, but it was still nothing quite like what it had suffered under Harry's wand.

"Better. But not yet good enough. You will keep practicing"

"Yes, Lord"

"Before returning to Hogwarts, you both shall demonstrate your ability to cast these on Muggles. For now, we will focus on the other spell you need for your initiation. The Killing Curse"

Beside Harry, Draco gulped quietly.

"The intention is important. Your subject does not deserve to live. Focus on that. It does not deserve to live. Put whatever face to it you like, but that is your intention"

The boys nodded.

' _Shouldn't be too hard'_

"You may find it easier than the Cruciatus. In time, these intentions will be subconscious, and will not require your thought at all. Until then, you will need to focus. The wand motion is" Here Voldemort raised one long-nailed finger to Harry's forehead, "in the shape of a lightning bolt. Top-down. The incantation is Avada Kedavra" he said, clearly emphasizing parts of the words.

"Harry, again you go first"

Harry looked at the rabbit.

' _Am I really just going to kill this thing?'_

And he focused on his memories of the orphanage. His memories of Mr. Roberts, and what he had done to the man. He held his image in his mind until he saw it on the rabbit. ' _You never deserved to live'_

"Avada Kedavra"

A green light lit up the room. The rabbit lay on its side. It was clearly dead.

Voldemort actually laughed. Harry was too busy enjoying the feeling of power that rushed through his every inch to even process this.

"Well done, Harry. I see I have chosen well"

With a wave of his wand, there was another rabbit there.

"Well, Draco. Can you cast this one?"

Blushing, Draco closed his eyes for a few moments.

"Avada Kedavra"

The green light hit the rabbit, which simply twitched its nose.

"Do better, Draco. It doesn't deserve life"

"Avada Kedavra!" He all but screamed, voice tight.

The rabbit died.

"Well done. Well done my students"

Voldemort stood before them, his gaze falling on them.

"You will continue practicing this. Before your return, you will practice on Muggles"

With that, he dismissed the shellshocked boys from his presence.

The summer passed in much the way they usually did. Many of their friends came over at different times, and for one huge party, and if they found Harry and Draco to be a bit standoffish well, they suspected nothing too strange.

Every day, Harry and Draco would practice their spells. Halfway through the summer, Draco was able to cast both the Cruciatus and the Killing Curse to the Dark Lord's satisfaction. He decided their education would be incomplete without the Imperius.

Harry found it to be the easiest of the three. In fact, he had a strong suspicion that he had cast it before, albeit accidentally.

He remarked as much to Draco, unaware that Voldemort was standing a few feet behind him.

"Oh? What did you do with it?"

' _Don't lie. Don't lie'_

' _Don't tell. Don't tell. He'll want to know why you had to do it. Why you did it'_

"I-I" He stammered, eyes on his trainers, "I made him hang himself"

Voldemort gave a full-bellied laugh, something no one would have expected from the man who had terrorized and tormented Britain for years.

"Harry, you are full of surprises"

* * *

One bright day, the paper was full of pictures of a man that would come to dominate the news the remainder of that year.

The picture, of a man with wild hair and a crazy look in his eyes, his cheekbones almost jutting out of his skin, showed Sirius Black. Harry's Godfather. He had done the impossible and escaped Azkaban.

That day found Voldemort in an absolute fury.

"My followers lie in the dirt and Black escapes!"

"My Lord?" Harry asked nervously, kneeling before him.

"Yes?" He said, with an evident effort to not blow the boy to smithereens.

"I-I was under the impression that Black was a Death Eater? That he-betrayed my parents to you?"

Voldemort looked at him. Harry hid his eyes from that crimson gleam.

"Black was never one of mine," He said finally. "And I will make you a deal, Harry"

Harry didn't say anything. In truth, even though he had been in close contact with the Dark Lord for several weeks now, and was able to speak in his presence without stuttering, he still was terrified of him. The man had an aura about him, one of power, one that demanded respect. Harry was more than willing to give it.

"Over your Christmas break, once you have completed your initiation, I will tell you all about the days leading up to your parents' deaths"

Harry let out a breath he hadn't been aware of holding.

"Thank you, My Lord," he said shakily.

As Harry's ability with the Unforgivables grew, he noticed that, like the Dark Lord had said, he didn't have to spend as much time focusing on the hated memories. Draco, on the other hand, while having improved, still had to spend almost a minute thinking before he could successfully perform them. Harry tried not to think about it, but the reason for their disparate abilities was clear to him. Draco had lived a sheltered life, spoiled by his parents. He had never really been hurt, never had a reason to feel true hate. The closest thing to it Draco felt was probably his animosity towards Weasley or the other Gryffindors.

Harry, however, had not been sheltered or protected by any definition. He knew what it was to hate, what it was to wish a slow painful death on another person.

He knew, even though he had spent so long hating the fact, what it was to kill.

* * *

The two muggles were on their knees in front of the boys. Their mouths were gagged, but their fear was clear to see.

' _I don't have a choice. I have to do this'_

"Well, Harry. Are you ready?"

' _I can't'_

"How can I do this?" Harry whispered. Long fingers gripped his chin, gently tipping it back until he was looking the Dark Lord in the eyes.

"Would these creatures have lifted a hand, expended the tiniest amount of energy to even lessen the suffering you experienced at their compatriots hands?"

"No"

"Did any of their kind, ever try help you? Even once?"

"No"

"So what do you owe them? Why should you allow their fates to determine yours? Are they worth more than you?"

"No"

"Then they are not worth your hesitance"

' _THEY'RE PEOPLE! NOT JUST SOME TOY-'_

"Right now, they are obstacles. Obstacles in your way to power. You said you would serve me?"

"I did"

"I demand obedience. Cast the spells"

Closing his eyes, Harry called to mind Mr. Roberts' face.

"Crucio"

Through the gag, muffled screams made their way out. But the pleasure flooding Harry was even more than that of Crucioing the rabbit. He had gotten used to that. This? This was even better. Far better.

"Lower the spell"

The words meant nothing. He was shaking with the sheer joy of it. This was power. He could do anything.

"Lower the spell, now"

It broke through his mind. He hurriedly dropped the curse.

The muggle was lying on the floor, in a growing puddle of urine, shaking as spittle made its way around the gag. Tears streamed down his face.

Harry looked at his work, sickened and entranced. The remnants of the power he had felt still shuddered in him and his stomach was doing flips. He wanted to throw up. He wanted to cheer.

"End its suffering"

He held his wand steady.

"Avada Kedavra"

The Muggle's eyes glazed as his breathing stopped.

The feeling of absolute power flooding through Harry was enough to make him ignore the fact that he had just committed cold-blooded murder. He had spent literal years agonizing after the last time he had killed, arguably in self-defense, and now he listened to his Lord laugh at his kill and felt pride.

Draco threw up after he managed to do it.

The Dark Lord cleaned Draco's vomit with the slightest movement of his wand.

"You will not do that at your initiation"

It wasn't a question. Draco stared at the floor, cheeks burning. "No, my Lord" he managed.

"Many people have the same reaction after their first kill. Take heart, you share the company of Mulciber and Rosier"

Draco nodded, still resolutely looking down.

"Be proud. You are men. You have taken the ultimate power. Wielding power over another's life. I am proud to have men such as you joining my service"

Harry's chest felt warm, his Lord's words filling the rapidly emptying pit of power within him.

"I have decided, that in addition to the training in spell casting, Severus will also be instructing you both in Occlumency. Besides allowing you to avoid mental manipulation, it will aid you in controlling your emotions. The greatest danger in the use of the Dark Arts has ever been its ability to twist its casters' emotions. I have no use for lieutenants who are unable to control themselves"

Harry slowly raised his hand, still not quite meeting Voldemorts eyes.

"Yes?"

"My Lord, Sev-Snape once told me that he believed I would be able to study Occlumency only in my fifth year and onwards?"

"Perhaps I have greater faith in your abilities than Severus does. In any case, you are not aiming to master it at this stage. You are aiming for a basic level- to be able to sense if someone is in your mind and rudimentary control of your emotions. For you, Harry, that will be particularly important"

"My Lord?"

Voldemort sighed and adopted a lecturing tone. "Some people react more strongly to the Dark Arts than others do. Everyone who casts true Dark spells will feel some pleasure and power, but some feel it much more strongly than others. No-one is sure why even though theories abound. Some claim it is due to the age one begins their use, but yourself and Draco are the same age and you react strongly, while he does not"

' _So the amazing way I feel after the Cruciatus isn't exactly normal'_

"The cause does not matter. The outcome does. Tell me, Harry. Why does Dark Magic twist the emotions of its caster?"

"Um, because to cast it requires strong feelings of hatred and rage, and uh, you start feeling those subconsciously more often, which makes you more likely to cast them? Which makes you reckless?"

"Indeed. And for those who react strongly, the subconscious push to use these spells is far stronger. These spells may be far more powerful, but they are not suitable for every occasion. I will repeat myself: I have no use for lieutenants who cannot control themselves"

After their dismissal, just before the boys (who were now enjoying thinking of themselves as men) left the ballroom, the Dark Lord called to them.

"It goes without saying that no one is to be told. No exceptions"

 **AS ALWAYS, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW.**

 **COMING UP: DEMENTORS. YOU THINK YOU'VE SEEN HARRY'S WORST MEMORIES? OH, MY SWEET SUMMER CHILD**


	4. Chapter 3

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 3

As usual, Harry and Draco found themselves in a compartment with their friends on the Hogwarts Express. As usual, Crabbe and Goyle were wondering the train gormlessly. As usual, they discussed their summers while playing Exploding Snap, guessing who would be the new Defence teacher.

As usual, the trolley lady came around.

As usual, Harry was deep in thought.

' _None of them know. It's like nothing's happened. Like mine and Draco's lives didn't totally change over the summer. This is not going to be easy'_

"Harry?"

"Sorry Theo, what were you saying?"

"I asked you if you knew this Muggle card game. Poker?"

"I've read about it"

"Of course he has" Said Blaise. "He was too busy reading to actually play with the Muggles"

"Actually Blaise, it was more like the Muggles hated my guts and tried to beat me if I wanted to join their games"

That cast a pall on the conversation.

"So," Daphne said, voice full of false cheer, "What classes you guys taking?"

"Come on Daph" Tracey moaned, "We spent weeks talking about this last year. Do we really need to go through it again?"

"I'm just trying to make conversation" Daphne hissed back.

"How about Sirius Black?" Theo's voice was grim. "First person to ever escape. Must be a total nutter"

"He must be brilliant" Blaise replied.

"Yeah. But so is Dumbledore. Doesn't stop him being a nutter"

Everyone kind of just nodded to that.

"How'd you think he did it?" Tracey said, sounding excited.

"Mordred's balls, Tracey, how the hell are we meant to know? I don't even know what Azkaban looks like"

"Father told me once," Draco said, nodding to Theo. "He had to go there for something. He said it was horrible"

"Yeah? I mean, the Dementors are no joke, but-"

"Theo, he said he would rather die a torturous death than be imprisoned there"

Once again, silence fell over the compartment.

"That's what I love about you guys," Blaise said brightly, "You make for such lovely conversation"

"Well, what the fuck do you want us to do, just smile and laugh all the time? That's your thing"

"Oh, shut it, Harry" Blaise threw a chocolate frog at him.

Pansy walked back in, just in time to get hit in the face with a licorice whip.

"Fuck!" She snarled. "Theo! Watch where you put that thing!"

"He should be careful where he puts his thing too" Blaise whispered to Tracey, waggling his eyebrows. She slapped him playfully.

"Shut up, Blaise. You know what I heard in the girl's room?"

"The dulcet sounds of Cho Chang as she-"

This time Daphne slapped Blaise.

"What?" Draco asked.

Pansy flounced onto her seat.

"The new Head Boy is Percy Weasley!"

' _Wonderful. Another Weasley to hassle me'_

"And that absolute bitch Clearwater is Head Girl"

"Ok. We'll just have to avoid them. I mean, God, can you imagine how they'll treat us? Neither of them exactly like our House"

"None of the Weasley's do. I don't know anything about Clearwater"

"Pansy's right, she is a total bitch. You should have heard what she had to say about-"

"Why are we slowing down?" Harry asked, looking out the window. "We can't be there yet, can we? It's only been a few hours"

"Dunno," Theo said, looking at his watch.

The door opened, and Crabbe and Goyle hurried into the compartment.

The group watched in bemused silence as the two large boys took down their trunks and began rifling through them.

"What are you two doing?"

"Changing" Crabbe grunted.

Draco was spared answering as the train jerked to a sudden halt. Harry was almost thrown out of his seat. Tracey actually was.

"What the hell!"

As Crabbe opened the door to look out, all the lights in the train turned off.

"Lumos" Harry muttered. Everyone else followed suit, Theo mumbling "What the hell is going on?"

"Is it just me, or does it feel really-"

Crabbe stumbled backward, falling straight on his ass, on the floor.

At this point, Harry noticed two things.

Crabbe was shaking like he was under the Cruciatus.

And there was something in the doorway.

Whatever it was, it was tall. Its head just fitted under the roof. It was hooded, leaving nothing of its face visible. Its breathing was horrific, sounding like an emphysema patient on a bad day. It extended an arm, and its hand came free of its long sleeve.

It looked like something dead. Dead and rotting.

Whatever this thing was, it was definitely not human.

Harry raised his wand and was about to unleash hell on the thing when Draco grabbed his arm and began furiously whispering.

"I think it's a D-Dementor. Don't make it angry"

The Dementor stepped into the compartment, and cold flooded the room.

He was freezing. There was no longer blood in his veins, rather there was ice.

Someone was screaming. Harry couldn't tell who, but it sounded like one of the girls.

' _Wait. Are they screaming my name?'_

The cold sank deeper, into Harry's very bones. He hadn't managed to turn and see who was screaming by the time the Dementor moved forward, closer toward him, dead hand outstretched.

' _He was being impaled. The pain was worse than anything he had experienced. Worse than anything Joseph had ever done to him. He was bleeding around the mass pushing into him, and he was bleeding from where he had bitten clean through his lip._

" _You like this, don't you?" His tormentor asked, grunting throughout._

" _No" he answered, tears streaming down his face, screams locked in his throat._

 _His shoulder was being pinched, hard. He could feel skin breaking. A fist punched his side, once, twice, three times._

" _I said. You like this, don't you?"_

 _Harry gasped, trying to get his breath back. He couldn't scream. He would be in worse pain if he did._

" _Yes" he managed, finally drawing enough air to speak, "I like it"_

" _Tell me how much"_

 _And throughout this all, there was the voice of Joseph shouting insults._

 _And in the background, there was a woman screaming his name._

 _His head blazed with a pain that almost matches his ass, and everything went black'_

* * *

Harry came to slowly, the comforting motion of the Hogwarts Express back in action below him.

Someone had moved him onto a row of seats and taken his glasses off.

He started sitting up, and there was an explosion of voices.

"He's awake!"

"Daphne, where'd you put his glasses?"

"Theo, give Harry some of the chocolate now!"

His glasses back on, Harry saw his friends sitting around, eating chocolate. Which Daphne was now holding out to him. Everyone looked pale, and Theo looked like death warmed over.

"What the absolute fuck was that?" He asked, waving her chocolate away.

"Harry," she said, in a tone that brooked no argument, "eat some chocolate. It helps"

He took some and started chomping it. It actually did seem to do something. The cold that had settled into his bones was being replaced with a pleasant warmth.

"Ancient feminine wisdom?"

"No," she said, smiling back, "new Defence teacher. Seems like he actually knows his stuff"

"What happened?"

"Well," Daphne said, a bit uncomfortably, "the Dementor came into the compartment. It was—horrific"

"Terrible" Tracy muttered. She was huddled in the corner next to Theo.

"You-you just started shaking. You fell over and started shaking. Then you just stopped. I thought you were-"

"Did anyone else faint?" Harry interrupted.

"No. It looked a bit close for Theo though"

Theo was staring at Harry, eyes narrowed.

"What you looking at?" Harry barked at him, and he hurriedly looked away, muttering "nothing"

"So anyway" Daphne continued, "Suddenly this silver-thing just charged at the Dementor, and it ran, well, glided away. So in comes this guy, who tells us he's Professor Lupin, the new Defence teacher. He checked you out, said we should let you sleep, and gave us all chocolate. It really does help"

The rest of the ride passed in a subdued silence. Harry noticed Theo giving him odd looks a few times, but brushed it off. It was pretty embarrassing to have been the only one to faint.

When they got onto the carriages, Draco gave a small gasp.

' _That's right, he couldn't see Thestrals before. Seems like those Muggles were good for something after all'_

Harry had a nasty laugh at the thought and immediately felt sickened.

' _Fuck. How can I think like that?'_

As they arrived at the castle, Professor Snape pulled Harry aside to a small room where Madam Pomfrey was waiting. She immediately began fussing over him, waving her wand.

"Dementors!" She huffed, "What are they thinking?"

"As usual, they were not" Snape replied.

"And they're always the worst on the fragile ones"

"I'm not fragile!" Harry exclaimed hotly.

"Mind your tongue!" Snape hissed at him.

"You won't be the only one who faints. Here, have some chocolate"

"I already did. Lu-Professor Lupin gave us some"

"Did he now?" The plump matron said, regarding him thoughtfully. "Perhaps we finally have a Defence teacher who is not totally useless"

Snape snorted at that, before saying, "So Potter is alright?"

"Yes, Yes. He can go to the dratted feast"

"Thank you, Poppy. Potter, with me"

Harry followed as Snape billowed out of the door. Followed him all the way to the Great Hall. Just outside the doors, Harry called him, softly.

"Yes?" Snape turned around to face Harry.

"Why did the Dementor affect me so badly? Is it-am I-"

Snape's gimlet eyes glinted as he looked through Harry. "Dementors pull out one's worst memories. They force you to relive the worst, the most terrible moments of your life. You have had worst experiences than most"

"How do you kill them?" Harry whispered.

"And I thought you were intelligent. Dementors cannot be killed. They are not truly alive"

"But, Lupin did something to scare it away. He shot something silver at it, and it-"

"The Patronus" Snape said harshly, "is a highly advanced spell, that indeed, will fight off and negate the effects of a Dementor. But it-"

"Will you teach it to me?" Harry asked. The Dementor has done more than bring up bad memories. The Dementor has made him feel weak, had made him feel vulnerable. He would not allow that to happen in the future.

"Mind. Your. Manners. Boy" Snape snarled. Breathing deeply, he continued, in a more normal voice.

"I will attempt to teach it to you. It will be difficult. Particularly with the spells you were being trained in over the summer"

"The Cruc-"

"Shut up! Idiot boy! Don't speak of such things!"

Rage flashed through Harry for an instant, before giving way to shame.

"Sorry" he mumbled.

"We will speak of this at a later stage," Snape said, giving him a look that was usually reserved for Longbottom.

Harry followed Snape into the Great Hall, sidling up to the Slytherin table and making his way to his seat, next to Draco.

"What was that about?" Draco whispered to him.

"Pomfrey wanted to check me up"

"Oh. I thought-"

"Not here"

Draco leaned back, abashed.

Harry had arrived just in time for Gregor Yardley to be placed in Hufflepuff, and then the feast began.

"I'm telling you, he might look like shit, but he'll be good"

"You say that Daphne, but I'll wait to see what his lessons are actually like"

"Come on! He made a Dementor run! Besides, Lockhart dressed well, and-"

"We know he dressed well. We saw how you watched"

"Draco! Enough about-"

Daphne was cut off again as Dumbledore stood up at the podium.

"Welcome! And welcome back! I have a number of announcements to make, so if you will all bear with me, I'm sure your beds will wait patiently"

He looked over the sea of faces.

"As always, I must warn you against venturing into the Forbidden Forest. It is forbidden for a reason"

"I also wish to announce yet another updated version of Mr. Filch's forbidden item list. I am sure he will be more than willing to explain everything on the list, and the punishments for owning said items"

Dumbledore's face grew more serious, losing all humor.

"As you are aware due to the train being searched, we will be hosting some of the Dementors of Azkaban for this year. They will be on guard at all the entryways to the school and will be patrolling the grounds. I beg your caution. They do not take kindly to jokes or attempts to trick them. They do not listen to excuses. Nor are they fooled by glamours, disguises, disillusionment, or even invisibility cloaks"

Harry and Draco shared a look.

"The Ministry has placed them here for your protection. Do not fool with them"

Dumbledore let an ominous silence fill the room, before clapping his hands.

"On another note, we have some additions to the staff to introduce. Firstly, I am proud to welcome our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Remus Lupin"

Polite applause filled the room, although the Gryffindors got way too into it.

"Secondly, Professor Kettleburn has decided to retire from teaching Care of Magical Creatures, to fulfill his dream of spending time with his remaining limbs, and writing the definitive book on Basilisks. I am therefore pleased to announce his successor, our very own Rubeus Hagrid, who will be taking teaching on in addition to his groundskeeper's duties"

There was stunned silence for a moment, and then the Gryffindor table simply exploded.

Weasley seemed to be shouting something about a fighting book, and the enormous oaf just sat in his seat at the staff table and wiped tears from his eyes.

' _He is a Professor? He's thick as a brick!'_

"And finally, Professor Binns has moved on to a well-deserved rest. In his place, I would like to welcome our new History of Magic teacher, Professor Olga Chronicle"

Again, polite applause as a cheery witch in a striking purple robe waved.

"As long as she's less boring than Binns, I'm happy" Harry muttered.

"Yeah? Then when will you sleep?" Blaise snarked.

"Let's begin the new year, with a good night's sleep," Dumbledore said, clapping his hands again. "Off to bed"

Lying in bed, Harry barely had time for one coherent thought before sleep took him.

' _Dementors. Fucking Sirius Black'_

 **AS ALWAYS, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW**


	5. Chapter 4

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 4

Harry woke up to the green-tinted sunlight streaming over his bed. He got up and got ready for the day, pausing only to wake up Crabbe and Goyle.

Down in the Great Hall, he was just biting into a piece of toast when one of the prefects came around with their new schedules.

"First thing, Arithmancy," he said. "What you guys got?"

"Muggle studies," Theo said with a sigh.

"Why are you doing that ridiculous class anyway?"

Theo shrugged. "Know your enemy, and all that"

"Nothing worth knowing," Harry said.

"Well, we've all Defence after, and then Care of Magical Creatures"

"You've got Care of Magical Creatures. I have a glorious free session"

"Seeing who the new Magical Creatures teacher is, I think you made the right choice," Draco said, nodding to Harry.

"Either way, today seems pretty chilled. Potions, History, and Transfiguration tomorrow- and then Astronomy that night, that's gonna be rough"

As breakfast finished, they all hurried out of the Great Hall, Harry trying to finish his last rasher on the way.

* * *

Professor Vector was waiting for them in the classroom. Harry hadn't really had any interaction with her before, other than saying good morning once or twice. He'd always thought she looked as serious a woman as McGonagall, and her pinched way of talking only served to increase his impressions.

After taking roll, she began talking, in a lecturing tone.

"Who here is not taking Magical Theory?"

Almost every hand in the room went up.

"Who here is not taking Ancient Runes?"

Slightly over half of the hands dropped.

Vector looked at them and nodded.

"Very well. These three subjects are very interlinked, particularly as we move into more advanced study. Those of you not taking Magical Theory, I want you to read the first 5 chapters of this book by Christmas, and to finish it by the beginning of next year"

A piece of chalk rose behind her back and began writing on the board.

 _ **Intermediate Magical Theory, by Alberta Waffling**_

"Those of you not taking Ancient Runes, I expect you to read these books by the beginning of next year"

The chalk rose again.

 _ **Beginners Runes, by Bjorn Scamdring**_

 _ **Theory of Runes, by Alberta Waffling**_

Quills scratched as the students wrote their required reading down. Harry just stretched his neck.

"Let us begin. Who here can tell me what Arithmancy is used for?"

Hands rose into the air again, far less than either of the previous times. This time, Harry's was among them.

"Potter?"

"Spell creation"

"Correct. Davis?"

"Warding"

"Indeed. Morgan?"

"Potions"

"Correct. Boot?"

"Divination"

"Half-right. Patil?"

"Magical objects"

"Yes"

She looked around the room. No more hands were up.

"All these and more, require Arithmancy. If you merely wish to follow a list of instructions, Arithmancy is not required. But, if you wish to improve, to understand the principles, to cover new ground. Well then, Arithmancy is your best option"

' _This is exactly what I've been looking for!'_ Harry thought excitedly.

"The world is made up of numbers" Professor Vector continued. "Muggle scientists tell us the number of subatomic particles determine what the atom will be. The very foundation of reality is determined by numbers. Gravity, oxygen, water. All of these can be boiled down to numbers"

Harry was writing furiously. He recognized the idea she was professing from their textbook, but she was just making it so much better.

"Every number has a magical property. For now, we will simply be accepting this as fact. Whether these properties are innate to magic, whether these properties have been assigned by some external force, whether our very belief in them forms these properties into existence-None of that is our concern right now. In later stages of the study, it will be, but for now, we simply accept it. These properties will determine many, many facts-How many times a potion must be stirred in which direction, which wand movements are needed for a spell, what must be done for a ritual to be successful. The results of all this is due to a number's magical properties"

She looked around the room and sniffed.

"However, we must learn to walk before running. With anything involving numbers, mathematics is required. We will be focusing for now, primarily on factorials. These will affect this class greatly"

And so she went on, lecturing and explaining factorials and other mathematical functions. Due to his Muggle schooling and voracious consumption of books, Harry had heard of many of these concepts before and had a basic idea of what some of them meant. But she was taking it to a whole different level. By the time class was finished, Harry had a cramp in his wrist and at least 15 inches of tightly written parchment.

As class finished, Harry and the rest of the Slytherins in Arithmancy made their way to the Defence classroom.

Some of their friends were already there. Draco was sitting in one of the back rows, parchment and quill ready.

Harry slid into the seat next to him.

"What'd you get up this morning?"

"Not much. Read a bit, just relaxed. How was Arithmancy?"

"Amazing. Gonna be hard work, but it's cool"

Blaise snorted and turned around. "No matter how cool it is, can't make up for the amount of work. Don't you remember Frank's little freak out last year?"

"Yeah, But Frank always was on the weird side. Besides, we're in the house of ambition, aren't we? A little work shouldn't be enough to scare us off"

Blaise just looked at him incredulously. "A little work?"

Just then, Lupin walked in.

"Good morning everyone," he said, taking his place at his table. "You can put away your parchments and quills. Today will be a practical lesson"

' _Practical? This should be fun'_

"First, let's just make sure everyone's here. And give me a chance to get all your names"

Once he was finished taking roll, Professor Lupin looked around the room and spoke.

"Before we move on to the lesson, I just wanted to discuss my plans for the year. We will be focusing on Dark creatures, and on spells, that mimic the effects of such creatures. Now, who can tell me what makes a creature be classified as 'Dark'?"

There was a little bit of silence before Daphne raised her hand.

"Yes? Miss Greengrass, correct?"

"Yes, sir. Um, they attack people?"

"Partially correct. But if that was all, why wouldn't a dog be considered 'Dark'? They have been known to attack, as have many predators"

The students seemed to be thinking it over, and it came to Harry.

"Yes, Mr. Potter?"

"They attack without provocation? And not for food?"

Lupin smiles, brightening up his face.

"Exactly. Take five points for Slytherin. A creature is only classified as 'Dark' if it will attack without provocation, and will attack for reasons other than food. Vampires, for example, are driven by a bloodlust. Even when they are not suffering the thirst, they still are pushed to shed blood"

Next to Harry, Tracey swallowed loudly.

"A transformed werewolf as well is driven by a need to attack. We will be studying many of these creatures, and how to protect oneself against them. With that, if you would all follow me? And bring your wands, of course"

They followed him curiously as he walked. After a few minutes, they arrived at the staff room, where Professor Lupin held the door open and gestured them in.

As Lupin walked in, a heavy wooden wardrobe in the corner shook ominously. Everyone took a step back, and Crabbe cracked his knuckles.

"Don't be alarmed. It's just a Boggart"

Based on the looks from some of his friends, it was something to be alarmed about. The name definitely rang a bell, but Harry couldn't remember exactly what it was.

"Now," Lupin said, "who can tell me what a Boggart is? Miss Davis?"

Tracey lowered her hand as she spoke. "It's a shapeshifter. It takes the form of your greatest fear"

"Well said. Boggart like dark, enclosed spaces. As such, they are often found in big homes. If you know what you are doing, they are little more than a pest. As Miss Davis said, they take the form of one's greatest fear. They use this to paralyze you with fright, and will then" he ran his finger along his throat.

"Now, there are a few things to keep in mind when dealing with a Boggart. One: a Boggart cannot take incorporeal form. Meaning, for someone who is afraid of heights, afraid of the dark, afraid of failure or of being alone— the Boggart will take the form of something else to prey on these fears"

Glancing around the room, Harry noticed looks of apprehension and anxiety on most of his friends' faces.

"Another thing to bear in mind is an advantage we have over the Boggart. We are in a group. The Boggart will have an overload of fears to choose from, and will thus have difficulty choosing and maintaining a form"

"The charm for dispelling a Boggart is a simple one, with no specific wand movement required. Riddikulus. Let me hear you say it, without wands"

"Riddikulus" they chorused.

"Excellent. Now, simply saying the spell is not enough. The Boggart's main weapon is fear, so you have to counter that. When casting the spell, imagine whatever form the Boggart has taken to be in an embarrassing situation. Something that changes it from an object of fear to an object of humor"

Lupin looked over the blank faces and continued.

"For example, a friend of mine was absolutely terrified of flying. When a Boggart assumes the form of a Cleansweep 5-then the top of the range Broomstick, she imagined it in the hands of a house-elf, being used to sweep the floors"

As the assembled students laughed, Lupin smiled and continued, "it made a most hilarious sight. Now, there is a curse that mimics the effects of a Boggart. To dispel it, one takes the same actions they would if they were actually facing a Boggart, namely, imaging their fear as something amusing, and casting Riddikulus"

' _That sounds like a useful spell to learn'_

"What finishes a Boggart off, is not the spell itself, but is the laughter that comes afterward. Therefore, it is imperative that you force the Boggart into an amusing situation"

Harry nodded.

"Who wants to go first?"

Blaise raised his hand. "I'll do it"

"Ok, Mr. Zabini. You know what form your Boggart will take?"

"I think so"

"And you know how you're going to make it funny?"

"If I'm right about what it is, then yes," Blaise said cockily.

"Wonderful. When Mr. Zabini is done I will call the next person forward. When you hear me calling someone's name, whoever is currently facing the Boggart will step back, and whoever I called will step forward. Is that understood?"

There was a chorus of yes's.

"Ok," Lupin said, stepping back and gesturing for everyone else to do so until Only Blaise was standing in front of the wardrobe.

"Remember, I am here. On my mark. 3. 2. 1"

As Lupin reached 1, the wardrobe door burst open. There was a hissing noise as a cloud of white mist poured out, and then-

 _Crack!_

"Holy shit" Harry heard someone mutter in awe.

There was a dragon standing in front of Blaise. Glistening red scales, it stood with its head just below the ceiling. Its tail curled behind it and thumped as it lifted and fell.

"Riddikulus!" Blaise cried. The dragon tried to blow fire, but only a stream of smoke erupted. It raised its talons to its throat, looking as confused as a giant lizard could.

"Great! Crabbe, forward!"

Blaise and Crabbe switched places. The dragon raised its snout for a second, and then-

 _Crack!_

In its place stood an enormous troll, gripping a huge club. It raised the club and-

"Riddikulus" Crabbe grunted.

The troll hit itself in the head with its club.

"Davis!"

 _Crack!_

A dead body was shambling towards Tracey, mangled arm slowly being raised.

"Riddikulus!" She squeaked.

Its arm fell off. An instant later, its head fell off, Tracey gave a little nervous giggle as Lupin called the next person forward.

Harry closed his eyesand thought about what his Boggart would be.

His first idea was the Dark Lord furious at him. As he tried to think of how he could possibly make that funny, the memory of the Dementor crept into his head. As he was thinking about that, he remembered Lockhart trying to wipe his memory. And then the Basilisk.

He had to laugh. _'I have no clue what I'm about to face!'_

A Dementor tripped in front of Goyle

' _What could it be?_ '

A vampire was advancing on Daphne.

' _I need to know how I'm gonna fight it! What am I most afraid of?'_

The answer came to him just as Theo was being called.

' _Being weak. I'm afraid of being weak. But how will that show? What will come? And fuck, I wanted to see what Draco got'_

Theo's Boggart was a sandy-haired wizard brandishing his wand. The boy was shaking as the Boggart drew nearer, not speaking, only grinning.

"Riddikulus" he finally shouted, high pitched.

The wizard was wearing a diaper, had a pacifier in his mouth, and his hair was set in curls.

' _What can I do? It will probably be me, crying on the floor or something. How can I make that funny?'_

Harry was still pondering this when his name was called. He stepped forward, and Pansy's Hag flares at him.

 _Crack!_

It was taking shape slowly. It seemed to be a small humanoid thing.

 _Crack!_

It was tall, taller than him. Red eyes glinted and-

 _Crack!_

It took the form of a potbellied man. Bulbous nose, small, beast eyes. He had a tweed peaked cap over his dark hair.

Harry froze.

' _Mr. Roberts'_

It opened its mouth, revealing its yellowish teeth. Its tongue lapped out.

"Thought you'd get away from me, boy," it said, walking towards Harry.

"No" he muttered.

"You did," it said. Its one hand moved towards its belt. "You thought you could escape me. But you can't. And you don't really want to"

"Riddikulus" Harry whispered. But nothing happened.

"You like it, don't you. That's why you can never tell. Because then everyone will know just what a dirty-"

"RIDDIKULUS!" Harry shouted.

Mr. Roberts was hanging from the ceiling, robe tight around his neck. His face was blue as his eyes bulged out. The rope had left blackened marks around his throat.

There was stunned silence in the room. Harry looked at the horrified faces around him. Lupin tried to say something, but Harry ran out of the room before he could finish his words.

* * *

He was sitting at the far side of the lake, arms wrapped around his knees. He had been throwing rocks into the lake, but it didn't help. It didn't shut out his thoughts.

' _I can never get away. He's always following me. No matter where I go, there he is. And now everyone knows'_

He screamed.

' _Fuck'_

He conjured a rabbit.

The Dark Lord has ensured they were able to do that.

The Dark Lord has also taught him an effective way of dealing with anger.

"Crucio"

As the rabbit twitched and squealed, Harry felt the pleasure pouring into him. But it wasn't enough. Not at all.

"Avada Kedavra"

The rabbit died.

He screamed again.

"Diffindo," he said, slicing the dead rabbit in half. Its intestines poured out and unspooled in a puddle of blood. He kicked the halves into the lake.

He conjured another one.

"Crucio"

"Crucio"

He was almost ready to go back to the castle. Almost. Just a little bit more to get his equilibrium back.

"Crucio"

Footsteps.

He spun around, thrusting his wand forwards. Right into Pansy's face.

"Harry-"

He looked a mess. Tears had run lines down his face, and his red-rimmed eyes had a crazy look in them. He knew it. He had seen his face in the lake enough to tell, even though the night was falling now.

"Tell no-one what you just saw," he said quietly.

Pansy swallowed before saying. "Harry, please. Everyone's worried about you. Everyone's out looking. Come back to the castle"

He looked at her.

' _She saw my Boggart. She knows. They all do'_

"Draco took your stuff back. Lupin gave us all points for fighting the Boggart, and-"

"I'll come back in a few minutes, Pansy. But if I hear anyone mention anything about today's Defence class..."

Pansy looked at him with wide eyes.

"I'll kill them," he said quietly. And he meant it.

 **AS ALWAYS, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW.**


	6. Interlude I

**AN: STILL DON'T OWN THIS**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Interlude I

 _Headmaster's office_

"So, Remus. Why have you requested this meeting?"

Remus looked at Dumbledore and Snape. Dumbledore looked like There was no place he would rather be, while Snape—didn't.

"As you are aware, Headmaster, I have been using a Boggart for my third-year class. It is due to the result of the Slytherin class that I wish to speak to you"

"Just to be clear," Snape said, with a sneer, "you exposed them to a Boggart?"

"Come on, Severus. You know as well as I that a Boggart is very rarely truly difficult for children. In our third year, in fact, we faced a Boggart. Or did Slytherin have a different curriculum then?"

Snape just scowled as Lupin continued.

"Besides, I was standing by"

What happened?" Dumbledore asked, calmly.

"For the most part, the Boggart's forms were normal. Expected even. Monstrous creatures and the like. But then-"

Lupin cut off, lost in thought.

"Then?" Dumbledore prodded, gently.

"Albus, are you sure the Pensieve is unavailable?"

"Quite sure. Professor Babbling is using it with the NEWT class for another two weeks at least"

"Ok, ok. Harry faced the Boggart, and-"

"You placed him in front of a Boggart?" Snape asked, in his soft voice.

"I originally wasn't going to!" Lupin said, a bit flustered, " I didn't want Voldemort" Snape flinched, "appearing in my classroom"

"What changed your mind?" Dumbledore asked.

"The Dementor. Harry suffered the most from it, and I thought his self-esteem had taken a blow. I wanted to give him a chance to recoup that loss. Also, it wouldn't be kind to him to single him out from everyone. I know that James would have-"

"He is not James" Snape spat furiously.

"Enough!" Dumbledore snacked his desk. "What form did the Boggart take?"

"It was-it was a man. A Muggle, if I had to guess. Nothing too remarkable about his appearance. But-"

Lupin looked at Snape and Dumbledore.

"It is still close enough to the full moon that my senses, particularly my sense of smell is far, far beyond someone not afflicted. I can smell emotions"

Dumbledore nodded. Snape continued to scowl.

"When there was a dragon in the classroom, I could smell fear from the one facing it. When Lucius Malfoy told Draco that he is a disappointment unworthy of the Malfoy name, he was afraid and anxious. But when Harry faced this man, this totally normal looking man-He was utterly terrified. It's difficult to explain to someone who can't smell it, but I. I haven't smelled such fear since the war" he lowered his voice slightly, shakily, "since the Vineyard". Snape and Dumbledore both flinched at that. No matter what side they had fought on, no one who had been at the Vineyard could hear mention of it casually.

"It started talking, and it just made his fear stronger"

"What did it say?" Albus asked, looking grave.

"I would rather not paraphrase. I believe it is important. I'll give you the Pensieve memory"

"At least give us an idea"

"It said how Harry could never escape from him. How Harry liked it, and everyone knows now"

A horrible silence filled the room.

"Harry tried to dispel it and failed. I was about to step in when he tried again and succeeded"

Lupin stopped as the horrific image filled his mind again. Albus must have seen something in his face.

"What happened?"

"The Boggart changed form. It was the same man, hanging. He was dead"

Snape and Dumbledore shared a look.

"He ran out of the room. What happened to him, Albus? Who was that man?"

Albus sighed, wiping his eyes. He put his glasses back on and gave Lupin a tired look.

"Harry was abused in the orphanage he grew up in. I believe his Boggart took the form of the man who raped him"

Lupin just goggled. He had suspected this was the case, but to hear Albus say it so simply. It-it boggled the mind. James would-but James was dead.

"Harry did something, some accidental magic. I don't know what exactly it was, and to be honest I don't want to. But the rapist, one Mr. Roberts, hung himself"

"Has Harry ever spoken about this? To a mind healer?"

Dumbledore and Snape both shook their heads.

"Why the hell not? he obviously needs-"

"Remus" Albus said, raising a hand and cutting him off, "you cannot force him to speak about it"

"No, you cannot" Snape interjected. "I have been slowly maneuvering him to talk more about his experiences, with the goal of having him admit that he needs professional help"

"Be that as it may, you can't simply let it fester! The longer you leave it-"

"What would you have me do, wolf? Force him to speak about something he isn't ready to? As it is, your little stunt may push him back-"

"My little stunt? I had no idea to expect this! Pomona gave me a missive about one of her house members, you could have done the same!"

Albus smacked the table again.

"Enough! Severus, make yourself available for the boy"

"As I always do"

"And Remus, you were not at fault. I should have informed you"

"But what are we-"

"Enough! Remus, Severus us dealing with Harry. He is the boy's head of house, and has had two years to build a relationship with him. Harry feels close to Severus. When he is willing to talk, Severus will know before you or me"

"Fine" Lupin said, throwing his hands up, "I will abandon Harry to his memories"

"No-one said you have to abandon him. Just don't push him to talk unless he brings it up"

Lupin left the room in a frustrated state, Snape near behind him. Dumbledore watched them go, and once the door had closed and he was alone in the office again, he allowed a single tear to slip from his eyes. As the tear fell, he thought.

' _The child of prophecy finds the idea of his enemy dying amusing. There is little hope of this ending as a bloodless victory'_

* * *

 _Slytherin third year girl's room_

Pansy Parkinson lay in bed and thought about Harry.

When she had come across him torturing the poor rabbit, she had barely believed her senses. And then he spun around and had his wand inner face.

That had been more terrifying than facing a Hag.

And yet- there was something about his eyes. He had a crazed look in them, and she had been sure for a few seconds that he was going to Crucio her.

But he hadn't.

He had trusted her.

Tortured as he was, he had trusted her.

And that dangerous, terrifyingly beautiful look in eyes was now embedded in her mind.

His face-he had looked like a warrior of old, on a mission of vengeance.

The tears had made lines down his grimy face and simply caused his haunting beauty to stick out more.

The memory of how he had looked, as the sight itself did, made her feel warm.

Pansy Parkinson only realized then, that what she wanted more than anything else was Harry Potter.

And as her mother often said, a Parkinson always gets what she wants.

* * *

 _Slytherin third year boy's room_

Draco Malfoy lay in bed and worried about his best friend.

He lay there, hands stiffly clenching one another. If they weren't holding something when he was alone, they would tremble.

His eyes stayed resolutely open.

If they closed while he was alone, he saw the muggle's face.

The muggle he had killed.

He had been such a fool, telling Harry how killing a muggle was like slaughtering a pig.

He knew different, now.

He had been waking up in the middle of the night, with the muggle's face clearly in his mind's eye. On these occasions he would stumble out of bed, and run to the bathroom.

Sometimes he made it to the toilet before throwing up.

' _I don't even know his name. Anything about him'_

But more than that, Harry had him on edge.

There was something—broken about Harry.

He hadn't even realized until recently.

Until he saw him cast the Cruciatus.

Until he witnessed the pleasure his friend got from killing.

When Pansy has come in and found them all, and said she had found Harry, and that he was coming back, everyone had been relieved.

When she told them that Harry said he would kill whoever speaks about the Defence lesson, there had been nervous laughter.

Draco hadn't laughed. Not a bit. In fact, he was worried Harry would do just that.

The Dark Lord's mention of people "reacting strongly" to Dark Magic hadn't calmed him either.

He knew his aunt was one of those people. And he had heard enough stories about her to be terrified of her, even though he'd never met her.

He'd heard enough stories about her, in fact, to be terrified of his friend going down the same route.

And there was absolutely nothing he could do about it.

The Boggart has simply made clear something about Harry that Draco had long suspected.

Well, two things.

That the abuse he had suffered in that orphanage was not simply children being mean but was rather, far more sinister and insidious than that.

And that there was something really scary about Harry.

That Harry's version of making his Boggart funny involved turning it into a corpse only served to reinforce his suspicions.

And on top of this, Draco was terrified of his own upcoming initiation. He wasn't sure he would be able to kill another muggle who had done nothing to him.

The Dark Lord would probably allow him to back out, he was a Malfoy after all. But facing his father's disappointment? That was something he couldn't do.

And he had no one to talk to about this.

Talking to his father was out of the question. It made him think of talking about wanking with his father. Something that would be simply far too embarrassing to do.

Talking to his best friend was out of the question. After everything he had said to Harry about how it isn't worth feeling bad for killing muggles, he couldn't simply eat crow and ask his advice.

His other friends wouldn't understand. Even if his father and the Dark Lord hadn't both forbidden him from speaking to them about it, they wouldn't understand.

He was alone.

Totally, utterly alone.

' _No I'm not'_

Draco sat bolt upright. He felt like such an idiot.

' _If I can't speak to my father if I can't speak to my mates. I'll have to speak to my godfather'  
_

Snape would be ideal to talk to. He knew what it was like to kill. He would be able to understand the issues Draco was having.

Hell, he'd helped Harry with his guilt, hadn't he?

' _And I can tell him my worries about Harry'_

Feeling relieved, Draco fell asleep minutes later. His sleep would not be disturbed with crying muggles.

* * *

 _Malfoy Manor_

Lord Voldemort sipped one of Lucius expensive wines and smiled.

His Horcrux, his prophesied enemy would soon be his.

Harry was already being bound in chords he could not see, and soon it would be final.

Killing for someone is a powerful way of binding yourself to them.

Publicly killing for someone- Well, that was almost irreversible.

And when his closest friend was tied as well, it made backing out near impossible.

' _Perhaps more of his friends should be recruited. After all, they are the future'_

Now that was an idea. Take them young, and they would be his forever. Young minds were far more malleable than older ones. And hadn't his own original group of followers begun as little more than children?

' _Not yet. For the most part, at least. They are still too young. Another year or two, and they will be ripe_ '

Nevertheless, it was something to plan for.

Another thing to plan for.

The potion Severus was brewing would still be another six months. He could have done it himself, but brilliant as he was, potions was not his expertise.

For Severus, it was, simple as that.

Besides. Every action he got Severus to do, especially things that interested him, bound him tighter.

If there was any wizard alive, other than himself or Dumbledore who could find a way around the oaths he had forced Severus into, it was Severus. Or Bellatrix, before Azkaban.

That was another thing. He would not be in an ideal position to free his Azkaban bound servants for at least another year. Not without revealing himself too much.

It still rankled him, to leave them in the torture of another.

They were his!

The glass burst in his hand.

He repaired it absentmindedly, pulling the spilled liquid back into it as he did so.

' _At least my Horcrux is mine again. Mine, and now he too knows he is mine'  
_

Lord Voldemort smiled as he pondered the fine nets he would form around Harry, eternally binding him.

One thought ran through all his plans. It was this thought, in fact, that drove Lord Voldemort more than any other.

' _Mine'_

 **NOTE: I GENERALLY HATE THE WHOLE "THEY'RE SO DANGEROUS, I LOVE THEM SO MUCH" TROPE, AND I KNOW I'M NOT ALONE IN THIS. I'M USING IT FOR A REASON.**

 **AS ALWAYS, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW.**


	7. Chapter 5

**AN: I OWN NOTHING OF VALUE**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY!**

Chapter 5

No one mentioned the Boggart, which was more than fine with Harry.

He did get some odd looks from his classmates but found that staring back at them with his best "I will eat your heart" look caused that to stop pretty quickly.

In fact, he was happy to simply forget the whole Boggart incident had even happened, and since everyone was ignoring it, it was very easy to do so.

"Runes today!" Tracey announced at breakfast.

"Yeah. Gotta admit I'm looking forward to it"

"Of course you are," Theo said, rolling his eyes. "You're taking Magical Theory also, aren't you?"

"Yeah" Harry admitted. "The first lesson is tomorrow night. Great way to head into the weekend"

"You still have classes on Friday though?" Goyle asked.

"Yes, But it's not a full day. And then we've got Quidditch practice on the weekend. Barely have any time for the library"

"Only you will complain about that"

"That's cause he's ambitious, Theo! Maybe not everyone is willing to just coast along!"

Harry looked at Draco, confused. Pansy didn't usually get involved when they were snarking each other unless someone called her out or something.

Draco just shrugged.

' _Does anyone actually understand girls?'_

Theo looked quite taken aback and was busy saying something about Pansy's own laziness. Harry decided to extricate himself and joined those heading to Runes.

* * *

"Good morning class! I am Professor Babbling"

They all chorused back a good morning.

"Lovely. Who can tell me what language these Runes are in?" She pointed to a series of runes on the chalkboard.

"No one? Honestly, I'm not surprised. I hadn't really expected anyone to recognize a mixture of Elder Futhark and Proto-Scandinavian. This langue is what we simply refer to as Ancient Runes. Who can tell me why this language specifically is used as the accepted magical Rune tongue?"

The room was absolutely silent.

"Again, I'm not surprised. The cultures that used these tunes, the Scandinavians, and the Germanic tribes, would imbue their writings with magic. Many, many cultures and groups did so, but none with such an amazing level of success as these two groups. Therefore, a mixture of their runes has been adopted almost unilaterally by the international magical community. This is used for many official documents-treaties and the like. More importantly, it is used to cast magic. Who can give me an advantage of using runes over using more typical spells? You, Miss Davis?"

"It's easier to set a rune to respond to circumstances?"

"Correct. Anyone else? Potter?"

"Runes can last forever, while other enchantments fade?"

"Correct. Eventually, you will learn how to use runes in magic. For now, we will be focusing on learning the language of runes. You cannot use a single ounce of runic magic if you don't know what the runes mean. And so..."

Harry found the lesson to be exhausting. Great, but complex. It was literally learning a brand new language. Not only that but a language that he would never simply use in conversation. A language with entirely different rules of grammar to any he was used to. What made it more complicated, was that as Babbling said, the language they were studying was actually a mixture of two runic languages. So in essence, they had to learn both of them, and then the entirely separate mixture they resulted in.

But as she said, anyone wanting to know the power of runes, only had to read the old Viking epics. Or look at almost any magical object-they all used runes in their creation and function. It would just take a lot of effort until he reached the point of being able to use them that way.

Their first potions lesson was-fun.

Shrinking solutions were cool enough to make, but Snape has definitely gained new levels of hate for the Gryffindors over the summer. Watching Longbottom cry as Granger whispered instructions to him, had just made Harry glad that someone else was suffering for once. After class, Draco was held back for a few minutes. When he caught up with the crowd at lunch, he leaned over and whispered to Harry "Snape's joining us tonight"

Harry nodded. This would definitely be interesting.

* * *

He was right, it was interesting. It was much more than simply interesting, in fact.

"You are here to learn how to fight" Snape had said, silky voice softer than usual. Even with all the charms he had placed on the room, he was still careful not to be too loud. "You are not merely learning spells to add to your repertoire. The most important thing in a fight is not necessarily which spells you use. It is not necessarily even how quick you cast them. It is how quick you think"

With a sudden, fluid motion he cast a spell at Draco. The boy didn't even have time to raise his own wand, let alone block it.

It collided and did nothing.

"Had that been a harmful spell, you would be hurt" Snape said. "You need to learn to react instantly. To think of an appropriate response and act on it the very second your enemy acts towards you"

Harry had been half expecting it, but even so, Snape's spell hit him.

"In a fight against wizards of any caliber, as you are now you would both be beaten. Badly. There is a lot of work we need to do"

"The Da-"

"Imbecile!" Snape hissed, shutting Draco up. "The only place where you will discuss such things is my office. Understand?"

"Yes. But-"

"No but. You could use a healthy sense of paranoia"

Snape looked at them both.

"We will be focusing on improving your battle reflexes. The only real way to do this is practice"

"And Occlumency?" Harry asked.

Snape sighed. "We will be spending some time on Occlumency, at the end of our sessions. I will tell you the basics, and you will practice. Then we will move forward with it. Understood?"

"Yes, sir. And fighting Dementors?"

Draco perked up at that.

"We will be spending time on that as well. But right now, that is not our focus. For now, you will be attempting to block. I will be going easy on you"

A few seconds later, a stinging hex hit Draco. Immediately afterward one hit Harry. Neither of them had even been near getting a shield up.

"Both of you, holster your wands. On my mark, I want you to draw them and cast a shield. Ready. Set. Go!"

A few seconds later, they both had shields up.

"Not good enough. Again. Ready. Set. Go!"

By the end of the session, they each had been on the end of numerous stinging hexes.

"You will practice drawing your wands and casting shields. In a fight, every second is crucial"

They nodded, both of them sweating and rumpled.

"Now. Occlumency. For now, you will practice clearing your minds. Clear your minds of all thought, all emotions. You will do this for at least ten minutes a time. And you will do this multiple times a day"

"When you say to clear our minds-" Harry started.

"It is a process akin to meditation. Think of nothing. Intrusive thoughts will enter. Banish them. Let your mind be empty. At first, it will take you time to manage this. Once you have trained your thoughts, then true Occlumency begins"

' _Sounds mystical_ ' Harry thought, suppressing a laugh.

"You will practice before bed, and upon waking in the morning. Other than that, in your free time, you will practice. Eventually, your mind will clear the instant you desire it. After that, you may be capable of having your mind clear at all times"

Snape looked them both over.

"You will practice doing this, and you will practice drawing your wand and casting as quickly as you can. Next week I will examine your progress. Once it is satisfactory, we will move on"

"And Dementors?" Harry asked

Snape looked through him before speaking.

"The charm to fight off Dementors is an emotion-based one. It requires you to be happy. Before next week, I want you both to think of your happiest memories. Not something that merely gave you excitement, but something that induced true joy in you"

Heading back to their dorm, Harry and Draco were almost too tired to speak. Snape had pushed them hard and given them both much to think about.

"Harry?"

"Mmm"

"Do you think-we'll be good enough?" Draco said hesitantly.

"We will" confidence filled Harry's voice. "I'm sure we will. We'll just have to work for it"

' _It's gonna be a hell of a busy year. Haven't even had the new History teacher yet, or Magical Theory'_

* * *

Professor Chronicle was—better than Binns.

She wouldn't be winning teacher of the year, but at least she didn't speak in a monotone. And she involved the class, instead of droning on non-stop the entire lesson. They were learning about witch hunts, and even though she wasn't exactly exciting, she still managed to keep them all interested.

' _A total breath of fresh air, after that stupid ghost'_

And then there was Magical Theory. After only one lesson, Harry was enamored. Professor Waffling was a no-nonsense, serious witch who really knew her stuff. She was also the only teacher who didn't live at Hogwarts. She lives in Hogsmeade instead, where she studied, researched and wrote in the day. She was also far more competent than the last teacher they had who had written the textbook.

There were only seven of them taking the class. Harry, Tracey, Granger, And four Ravenclaws.

"You probably all know there is no exam for this class, and that we only meet once a week for an hour. If you chose to join us because you thought it would be an easy class with no hard work, I must set you right immediately. Over the course of this year, you will read at least five books. After every lesson, you will be assigned homework and specific reading. If you are not willing or unable to keep to this, leave now"

When no one left, she closed the door and smiled.

"Lovely. Now, this class will mostly be for discussion. We are in pursuit of knowledge, in search of understanding, and so we pool our wisdom. Often, we can get carried away in our arguments, and so I must make this clear now: Any as hominem attacks will result in your being asked to leave and never return. Is that clear?"

"Yes ma'am"

"Lovely. Let's begin, shall we? Who can tell me what is the difference between a wizard and a muggle?"

Granger's hand narrowly beat Boot's into the air.

"Yes, Granger"

"A wizard is capable of using magic, while a muggle is not"

"Can you tell us what magic is?"

Granger frowned for an instant.

"A type of energy?"

"Perhaps" Waffling nodded.

"Now, Miss Granger's definition left out squibs. What is a squib? You, Boot"

"A muggle who's parents are wizards"

"Is that all?"

"Uh-"

"Another difference between wizards and muggles. You, Davis"

"Wizards live longer than muggles"

"And how long, on average, do squibs live?"

There was silence. Waffling continued.

"The life expectancy of a squib is the same as a wizard. Squibs experience magical diseases, unlike muggles. Squibs can see ghosts and Dementors. Muggle-repelling charms do not work on squibs. Tell me, can a Wizarding couple have a muggle for a child?"

No one answered.

"There has not been a single recorded case of a muggle being born to Wizarding parents. However, squibs and wizards and witches are born to muggles. Why? Potter?"

"Wizarding ancestry?"

"Some believe that, but there is not a shred of evidence to support it. Now, who can hazard a guess as to why wizards usually have Wizarding children?"

A tall Ravenclaw said "genetics"

"Please raise your hand and wait to be called, Simpkins. Nevertheless, nice try. One problem with it-we have managed to map out the human genome, and there is no genetic difference between wizards, squibs, or muggles. Anyone else? Patil"

"Magical cores?"

"Again, nice try. However, magical cores is an outdated theory that has been disproven. Granger"

"The soul?"

Waffling smiled.

"Five points to Gryffindor. Indeed, it is currently believed" she stressed those words, "that the properties of the soul are responsible for one's ability, or lack thereof, to use magic. We believe the genetics of the soul to be responsible. Not to go into too much detail now, but there is a wide array of supporting evidence for this theory, more so than for any other"

She glanced at her watch before continuing.

"Now, what do you have to say about squibs? Potter"

"They have access to some magic, but not all?"

"Excellent. Five points to Slytherin. Again, evidence suggests that there exist two types of magic a person could possess: active and passive. It is the passive magic which separates one from a muggle, extends life expectancy, protects from muggle diseases while making susceptible to magical, and the like. However, it is the active magic which allows one to actually use magic. For a squib, we believe, the switch in their soul for active magic is turned off, while the switch for passive is on. Simpkins?"

"Is there no way to fix this?"

She gave him a searching look.

"Perhaps. It is theoretically possible that a squib could be given active magic. Highly difficult, and extremely dangerous, and as far as I know never actually attempted, but theoretically possible. Yes, Patil?"

"Why has it never been tried?"

"Firstly, all forms of soul magic are classified as dark and banned by the Ministry. Even so, permission could be granted. However, soul magic is perhaps the most dangerous of all Magics to experiment with. If things were to go wrong, it could not only leave one a muggle or a squib. It could remove one's soul, and possibly even destroy it. No one is willing to simply try and see what happens"

"Homework! By next week, I want you to have to read the first five chapters of A compendium of Magical theories, and the first three chapters of a study of magic. I want a ten-inch essay comparing the theories in those books, and a twelve-inch essay regarding the differences between wizards, squibs, and muggles. Additionally, I want a five-inch essay on the fundamental difference between magical and non-magical creatures"

She laughed at their expressions.

"I did tell you I was going to have you work"

' _Well, I was right. It's going to be one hell of a busy year. At least we've got Hogsmeade weekends to take the pressure off'_

 **AS ALWAYS, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW.**


	8. Chapter 6

**AN: I STILL OWN NOTHING**

 **I WILL NOT BE FOLLOWING THE EXACT SCHEDULE OF THE SCHOOL YEAR AS PORTRAYED IN CANON. PARTICULARLY WHEN IT COMES TO STAGES OF THE MOON**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 6

"Hey, check this out!"

Harry turned to Blaise, who was holding the paper.

"Sirius Black spotted!" He read excitedly.

"Where?"

"It says it was near here!"

Harry carried on eating while Blaise read the article. Apparently, a muggle had spotted him near Hogsmeade and called it in. Of course, by the time the Aurors got there, Black was gone.

"Aren't you worried, Harry?" Theo asked.

"Why should I be?"

"Let me think. Hmmm. Maybe because the Dark Lord's second in command, and the first person to ever escape Azkaban is in the area? And being as you were responsible for his master's downfall, he might come after you?"

' _Responsible for his downfall? If only you knew, Theo'_

"Not really," Harry said, calmly smearing marmalade on another piece of toast, "I mean, we're in Hogwarts, there are Dementors everywhere-not really worries, no"

"So you're gonna go to Hogsmeade?"

"Why not? There'll be tons of people around, and I think there'll be Dementors there also. Especially if he's in the area"

"You're so brave" Pansy simpered, "I'd be so scared"

Harry frowned. Pansy had been acting really weird lately. The last few weeks, actually. Ever since she saw him outside.

' _Don't think about it. Don't think about the Boggart'_

Almost instinctively, he cleared his mind. It hadn't been going as well as he would want it to, his Occlumency training. Draco was doing far better at it than him. But he practiced and practiced, and Snape did say he would soon be able to move on to the next stage of training.

"You guys ready for the match? Have to keep up our winning streak"

"Of course we are" Draco answered, affronted. "We've been training so much already, and the match is only after Halloween"

"Yeah. Between that and homework, I've barely had any free time" Harry added

"Again. You chose the most intensive subjects. You don't really get to complain about the workload now, mate"

"I know, I know. And I actually like them, but still"

Pansy said something to Tracey that sounded suspiciously like "so smart"

' _I definitely need to speak to that girl. Something's going on with her'_

"You think Snape's still taking Defence?"

"Dunno. I mean how long could Lupin be sick for anyways?"

"Who knows? If it is him though, what are we meant to do with our werewolf essays?"

Harry and Draco shared a look at that. Snape has perhaps not so accidentally, let slip what exactly Lupin's sickness was. At first, they had been quite horrified. But eventually, they came to the conclusion that he could still be a good teacher. Especially when it comes to Dark Creatures.

"I think we should give them to him," Draco said. Harry stifled a laugh.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'm sure he'll find them interesting"

' _Especially when he reads what we had to write. The best ways to fight and kill a werewolf. Snape can be devious'_

* * *

Defence that day saw Lupin teaching again, this time lecturing on the specifics of red caps- nasty little gnome-like creatures that enjoyed leading travelers astray, and then killing them. They would also dye their hats in their victims' blood, and the darker the hat, the more blood they had spilled.

Easy enough to fight off, particularly if you weren't stupid enough to take their directions in the first place.

After class, Lupin asked Harry to stay behind.

"So, Harry. How've you been finding the lessons?"

"Good, sir"

' _Oh god, don't let him start talking about the first one we had'_

"I wanted to tell you, Harry, that if you ever need to speak, I'm available. I was close friends with your father, you know"

"Thank you, sir"

"I was thinking if you wanted to know more about your parents. Well, I would be more than happy to share"

"Thank you, sir. Really. But I try not to dwell on them too much. I can never really know them"

Lupin looked at Harry with a deep sadness in his eyes.

"That could be wise" he murmured. "Nevertheless, I'm available"

"Thank you"

"And, Harry?"

Harry turned from the door, a questioning look on his face.

"When you feel ready to talk about your Boggart-"

"I don't want to talk about it"

Lupin raised a hand, gently cutting him off.

"One day, you may find yourself wanting to. When that day comes, if you wish, I will be available"

Harry left the room without replying.

' _Who the hell does he think he is? I tell him I don't want to talk about it, and he just won't let it go! For fuck's sake!'_

He reached the library, and donning his invisibility cloak, headed right to the restricted section.

He pulled out the book he had been reading, a heavy tome of curses, and tucked it under his cloak.

' _He knew my parents, so that gives him the right to try to make decisions for me? Fuck him!'  
_

As always, the thought of his parents filled Harry with confusion.

He hated the fact that he didn't, and would never know them. He loathed the fact that people who had known them assumed he would be anything like them.

' _And don't forget. I've chosen to work for the man who killed them. The man who sentenced me to never knowing them, to never even knowing what I've lost!'_

Harry shuddered in his hiding place. It didn't do well to think about the Dark Lord that way. The man was simply the most powerful he had ever met, except maybe Dumbledore.

And even though he had killed his parents, Harry still had more respect for the Dark Lord than he did for Dumbledore.

' _Can't there be another way? With me not choosing a side? Not Dumbledore, and not the Dark Lord either? Is there really only two options?'_

Harry shuddered again, and taking a deep breath, tried to clear his mind. It was harder than usual, but he managed eventually. By the time he managed though, he only had a few minutes to read before he would have to head off to lunch.

' _All in all'_ he thought wryly, as he snuck back out of the Restricted Section, _'it hasn't been the most productive morning'_

* * *

"Your shields," Snape said, "are passable. Further improvement will come from your own practice and more importantly-from experience. We will move on, to dodging. Since you are both Quidditch players, your reflexes should be good. But sports reflexes and battle reflexes are not the same thing. You will not always be able to say a shield. Some spells are capable of bursting through shields- most notably, the Killing Curse"

Snape's eyes flicked to Harry's forehead.

"Neither of you are even near capable of battle conjurations. So we will focus on dodging. Without casting a shield, do not allow yourself to be hit"

With no more introduction, Snape began flinging stinging hexes at them. Their reflexes came in good stead, they were able to dodge a lot of his attacks.

But not all.

"Dead"

Harry rubbed his arm

"Dead"

Draco's leg was hit.

"Dead". "Dead". "Dead". "Dead". "Dead".

"We will have to work more on this. Let us move on to Occlumency. Sit down, both of you"

"I am going to be entering your minds, and I will be doing it subtly and secretly. Tell me when you notice my presence"

Ten minutes later, Harry felt something. It was hard to describe, but it was like someone had inserted a q-tip into his brain and was rubbing.

"You're in!" He shouted.

Snape looked at him, lip curling slightly. "And have been for the last ten minutes. Was I seeking out information, I would have been able to access it. Draco, let us see how you fare"

A few minutes later, Draco shouted.

"Better, but not good enough. You need to notice the very instant I enter. Otherwise, all your secrets are bared to me"

Harry shuddered.

"Continue clearing your mind. Once I am satisfied with your ability to recognize a foreign presence, we will move on to real Occlumency"

"Real Occlumency?" Harry asked, heart sinking.

Snape sneered back at him. "This is merely preparation. You are still far, far away from hiding your secrets from a Legilemens. And you are still far from mastering your mind. Continue your practice"

"Sir? About Dementors?"

"Once we move on to the next stage of Occlumency, I will begin teaching you the Patronus. Until then, continue your practice"

* * *

"Draco?"

"Yeah?"

"What's going on with Pansy?"

"What do you mean?"

"She's been acting weird. Complimenting me all the time. Since she-since she found me. You know, when everyone was looking"

"She has been acting weird"

"At first I thought I kinda scared her, and that she was, you know, trying to make sure she's on my good side. Now I'm not so sure"

"Why did you think you'd scared her?"

"When she found me, I was" Harry lowered his voice. There was no one in the corridor with them, but Snape had instilled paranoia in them, "practicing one of the spells we learned over the summer. The first one"

"And she saw?" Draco's voice rose and cracked.

"Yeah. But I told her not to tell"

"You told her not to tell"

"I may have pointed my wand at her threateningly"

"Well" Draco drawled, "they do say girls like a bad boy".

It took Harry a few seconds to comprehend what Draco had just said. When it clicked though, it clicked hard.

"You think she's-you think she-"

"I think she fancies you"

Harry's mind blanked more successfully than it had in any of his Occlumency practice. One of the fittest girls in his year was crushing on him?

' _Holy shit'_ he thought, giddily.

Then he asked the first question on a thirteen-year-old boy's mind.

"You think she'll put out?" He asked, trying to keep his voice casual.

Draco considered it. "I think if there's any girl our year who would, it's Pansy. You lucky bastard"

' _That certainly bears thinking about. When everyone else is asleep'_

"What do I do? I've never-never had a-"

"She's not your girlfriend yet, mate. Maybe ask her to Hogsmeade with you?"

"But what do I do? What do we talk about?"

"Just be natural. And don't stress about it. Ask her tomorrow, she'll definitely say yes"

"You think?"

"Trust me, Harry. I'm sure if it"

* * *

"Pansy?" Harry called as she was about to step into the Great Hall.

His stomach was shaking.

"Yes, Harry?" She said with a small giggle.

"Do you, uh. Do you wanna uh"

She arched an eyebrow.

"Do you wanna go to Hogsmeade with me? On Halloween?" He blurted.

Her eyes widened, eyebrows shooting up.

"I'd love to!" She said with a smile, "where should we meet? I've never been before"

"Me neither. Maybe, in the Great Hall? Before we go? Or by the entrance?"

"Sounds fantastic" She was blushing a bit.

"Which one you wanna do?"

"Great Hall? What time should we meet?"

"Let's say, 10?"

"Awesome!" She walked off with a spring in her step.

Harry watched her go, still stunned that he had actually gone through with it.

He walked into the Great Hall for breakfast with a huge smile on his face.

* * *

"Professor Waffling?" Granger had her hand up.

' _Of course. If she isn't trying to answer a question, she's trying to ask one'_

"Yes, Miss Granger?"

"We've been working with a lot of theories regarding the soul. I was just wondering, what proof do we actually have to the soul's existence?"

"That's a good question. You're muggleborn, correct?"

"Yes," Granger said, blushing a bit.

"For those of you wondering," Waffling said, addressing the class as a whole, "in the muggle world the existence of the soul is hotly debated, primarily between atheists and theists. They have no proof to offer either way, but we do"

She paused for a moment before going in.

"Those who have witnessed the Dementors kiss, have seen the soul actually depart the body. When soul magic was still performed, any practitioner of it could offer many visual proofs. Besides this, we have many, many pieces of circumstantial evidence to prove this. Let me make it perfectly clear, however, that the existence of the soul does not prove the existence of a god or gods. That is a common mistake made by those raised in the muggle world. We do not view religion and souls as synonymous. Is that clear?"

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you"

"Pleasure. Now, if we can continue to discuss the souls affects on our capabilities with magic. We were talking about..."

* * *

Halloween dawned brightly upon Hogwarts, bringing a welcome respite from the grey skies of previous days.

' _I must have lost the plot completely. What do we even do, honestly? Just talk? This is gonna be so awkward'_

Harry rubbed his sweaty palms against his robe as he walked into the Great Hall.

' _Was I meant to bring her flowers or something? Should I take her hand? God, why isn't there an instruction manual or something?'_

"Pansy!" Harry called waving her over. She was dressed in the uniform, which definitely eased his mind a bit. He'd been quite worried about whether he was expected to dress up for the occasion.

"Hey," She said brightly, "you ready to go?"

"I think so. Got to go through the crowd and all that"

"Yeah"

She stood there awkwardly for a second before Harry clicked.

"So" he extended a hand, "shall we?"

Hogsmeade was cool. Harry and Pansy store down the village's long, winding street, stopping to check out the shops and greet friends.

By the time they got to the Three Broomsticks, they were laden with packages. Sweets from Honeydukes, some-equipment from Zonko's (the Weasley twins attack on the Slytherin Quidditch team may have been a year ago, but it was not forgotten), a new quill from Scrivenshafts. He was more than glad to arrive at the Three Broomsticks, find a table, and dump the bags on the floor.

"So ridiculous they don't put featherweight charms on these things," Harry said.

"Honestly, it's like they're all muggles!" Pansy added. "Speaking of Muggles, look who just walked in"

Harry turned, to see Granger walking through the door, with her dimwits in tow.

"Hey, Granger! Didn't you think to brush your hair?" Pansy shouted.

Granger went beet red. Weasley looked like he wanted to shout something back, but she put her hand on his arm and whispered something.

"Honestly, I don't know why people like that are even allowed in Hogwarts," Pansy said to Harry.

"I don't know why you guys hate her so much. I mean, she's an annoying know-it-all, but so is half of Ravenclaw"

Pansy looked at him, mouth agape.

"She's a mudblood" she hissed, looking around, "that's what makes her know-it-allness so bad"

"But why does that make her worse than a pureblood know-it-all?"

Pansy spluttered. "Because-because she-"

Right then, their butterbeers arrived. Grateful for the distraction, Harry sipped his.

"It is much better fresh. Flint wasn't talking nonsense"

"Mmm. Listen, Harry. A Ravenclaw who's a know-it-all? That's just normal. A mudblood who's a know-it-all is cause she's trying to prove she's better than us"

"I guess", he said doubtfully, "I mean-"

"It doesn't matter. Why are we talking about something so gross anyway?"

"I dunno. You brought it up, and-"

"How've all your classes been?" She interrupted.

"Pretty cool. It's great how they all fit in with each other..."

A few minutes into his explanation in their latest discussion in Magical Theory, Harry noticed Pansy's eyes were glazing over.

' _Merlin, I'm boring her!'_

"How've yours been?"

"Fine. Care would be much better with a different teacher, but Hagrid is Ok. Divination is such a waste of time though if Trelawney is a seer than I'm a kneazle!"

"Really?"

Pansy rolled her eyes.

"She just talks such nonsense, all the time! Anyway, my mother says you can't learn to be a seer"

"So why'd you take it?"

"Duh. Easiest O there is, except muggle studies, and I would touch that with a ten-foot broomstick"

Just after Harry had paid, but before actually getting up to leave, Pansy started leaning her head towards him. It took a few seconds for him to process, but then-

' _Oh fuck. Oh fuck. It's actually happening. Holy fucking shit'_

He kissed her.

Her lips were soft, warm. He wasn't sure exactly what to do with his tongue, and the table in between them made it awkward to try out his hands around her, but he kissed her.

They surfaced, and Harry found himself staring into her chocolate eyes.

"That was nice," he said breathlessly.

She giggled slightly. "Yes, it was. Let's see if it gets even better"

It did.

They walked back to the castle holding hands, and only stopped for one more snog outside the entrance.

It was much better without a table in the way. Feeling her heart beating against his chest gave the kiss an intensity that had been lacking before.

' _God, I hope she can't feel me too much. Fuck, she can definitely feel that it's pressing right into her!'  
_

They sat next to each other at the feast, looking at each other and smiling every so often.

Even Theo's taunts couldn't ruin the great feeling Harry had. Especially when Daphne slapped him after he got a little too suggestive.

A few minutes after he had arrived back at the common room, still holding Pansy's hand, Snape stormed in. After a quick, muted conversation with the prefects, the whole house was called.

"Sirius Black has been in the castle"

Immediately, excited murmurs broke out.

"Silence! You will all be sleeping in the Great Hall tonight, while the castle is searched"

Snape looked over the sea of faces

"Follow the prefects. You will return in the morning to change"

"Oh, Harry. Are you all right?" Pansy whispered.

"I'm fine. I wasn't joking when I said I'm not worried about Sirius Black"

He didn't pay attention to the adoring look Pansy gave him. Or the calculating one from Theo.

 **AS ALWAYS: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW**


	9. Chapter 7

**AN:I OWN NONE OF THIS**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 7

The school was searched, and Black was nowhere to be found. Apparently, he had tried to get into the Gryffindor common room.

"Maybe he thinks you're in Gryffindor?" Blaise said, over breakfast.

"Why would he think that? I've been in the papers! They even quoted me as the young Slytherin Potter!"

"Harry," Theo said, with a long-suffering sigh, "Black's a lunatic who escaped from Azkaban. Who knows why he thinks what he does?"

"So why are you all assuming he's after me?"

"You tell them, Harry" Pansy said, before giggling to Tracey.

' _She's still quite annoying. Her kisses though'_

"Hello?" Theo said, snapping his fingers in front of Harry's eyes, "are you even listening to yourself? Do you really think it doesn't make sense for Black to be after you?"

"It does" Harry admitted, "but not much"

"Exactly! Won't you just make sure not to be alone?"

"I'll make sure of that" Pansy said

"Leave it, Theo. Harry will do whatever stupid thing he feels like" Draco added. Right then, Flint walked over.

"As long as no killer gets him without giving us time to find a replacement"

"Flint, I'll be-"

"Practice this afternoon," Flint said, ignoring Harry's attempts. "At five"

"Are you serious?" Harry said, pointing to the storm raging outside, "in this?"

Flint smiled. "Good chance the game will be like this"

"Come on!"

"It'll be fine. You know how to cast the impervious?"

Harry and Draco nodded.

"Good. That way we'll be able to see. Well, see you then"

He walked off, Harry and Draco goggling after him.

"So incredible, how dedicated you all are," Pansy said.

' _I swear if it wasn't for her kisses'  
_

* * *

"Hey, Potter. Your girlfriend didn't come to watch us practice today"

Bole nudged Derrick. "She probably didn't want us all to see how wet she gets"

The locker room burst into uproarious laughter. Harry blushed.

It was true that Pansy had been practically following Harry around everywhere. She's been at all the other practices too, cheering pretty much every time Harry did something.

It was cool but did feel a bit-smothering.

"So next week is the match. The first match of the season, and against Gryffindor" Flint began. Bole yawned loudly.

"We're going to crush them, and-"

"Like we've done the last however many years"

Flint shot Bole a dirty look. "That's true, but doesn't mean we should relax! We need to destroy them!"

"We will"

"Till next week then"

* * *

The whole school seemed to be getting into the feeling of anticipation for the match. As usual, the team started moving around in packs.

Finally, the opportunity came to get some level of revenge on the Weasley Twins. Using the invisibility cloak, Harry snuck up to them and planted a bunch of Zonko's products in their book bags.

After he had let some dungbombs off in the trophy room.

One anonymous tip-off to Filch later, and the Weasley's lost Gryffindor fifty points. And got themselves a week of detentions.

It would have been a lot better if McGonagall hadn't stepped in, and got them off detention for Saturday. They would be able to play in the match.

Still, it was worth it. Especially, since they had no proof of anyone setting them up. Of course, they weren't stupid and made a lot of comments against the Slytherins. Still, they would have been making those comments no matter who had done it.

Friday, the day before the match, Harry and Pansy were walking towards the library when they came across something that made his blood boil. From ahead in the corridor, over the thunder and howling wind, Harry distinctly heard a girl saying "God, Looney, could you be any crazier?"

A second voice responded, rather timidly.

"It's not crazy. This weather's obviously been caused by the Wimbourne Wasps bartering with Typhons-"

"Luna! Do you ever wonder why you don't have any friends?"

When the other girl next spoke, she sounded hurt "I have friends"

"Real friends. Not your nargles and wrackspurts"

"You're just jealous of me"

"Jealous?" She sounded incredulous. "Of what? A crazy bitch with no mother and a crazy father? As if"

Harry head a sob, and without even looking at Pansy he strode forward.

"Petrificus Totalus!"

The girl fell to the floor with a thump. Luna looked around and smiled at Harry, as Pansy caught up.

"You're always rescuing me. You should have shining armor"

"Thanks," Harry said, looking at the prone girl. There was fear in her eyes. It sent a jolt of excitement through him. Pansy took his arm, eyes wide and face flushed.

"You're gonna let her go now?" Luna asked.

"No" Harry tried to keep the tremble out of his voice. "I think I'm gonna have a chat with her"

"Don't hurt her" Luna said, urgently. "It's not her fault. Not really"

"Don't worry" _'not gonna hurt her, much'_ "just gonna make sure she won't bother you anymore"

"Harry, I-"

"I think you should go, Luna," Harry said, not taking his eyes of the girl lying before him. His breath was coming faster. "And Luna?"

She stopped before turning the corner.

"I think you should be more careful about who you tell your theories to. Not everyone appreciated them"

Luna walked off, but not before whispering "you should have worn the bracelet".

"What are you gonna do to her?" Pansy said, voice high-pitched. "Are you gonna cru-"

"Shut up," Harry said.

He shot a stinging hex at the girl.

"Just making sure I've got your attention"

"What's her name?" He said, still not turning his head from her.

"Sue. I think"

"Well, Sue. I think we should have a little chat. I don't much like bullies. Might be a bit hypocritical of me, but still"

Tears were pooling in her eyes now. She couldn't blink and clear them.

Harry's heart beat faster.

' _Maybe just one crucio'_

' _ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY? YOU won't GET AWAY WITH IT!'  
_

"And I really don't like when people's parents are mocked" he carried on in a conversational tone. "Now, how can I make sure you remember that? How can I make sure you'll tell all your stupid bitch friends to leave Luna alone?"

Next to him, Pansy watched with excitement.

"There are so many spells I'd love to test on you. And no-one would ever know"

' _Just one'_

' _AZKABAN FOR LIFE! YOU CANT TRUST PANSY, OR THIS STUPID BITCH!'_

He hit her with another stinging hex. By now, the tears were leaking out of her eyes and down her face. Looking down at the fear in her eyes, Harry felt power.

"Serpensortia" he whispered.

"This is a black mamba" it wasn't, but she wouldn't know that, "the most venomous non-magical snake in the world"

" _$Scare her. Let her think you're going to bite, but don't actually$"_

The snake lunged, missing her face by less than an inch. There wasn't fear in her eyes anymore. There was terror.

Harry smiled, beatifically.

"One bite, and you'll be dead in minutes. And in agony the whole time"

Her tears puddled onto the floor.

"You aren't going to bully Lina anymore, are you?"

The snake hissed, tongue actually touching her tears. Harry couldn't help but laugh.

"Right. You still can't speak. Finite"

Through her wracking sobs, the managed "I won't bully her anymore"

"And your friends? You'll tell them not to?"

"Yes. Please, j-j-just let me go"

"Run. If you tell a teacher, I'll kill you"

The girl ran off, rubbing her ass as Harry hit her with another stinging hex.

When they kissed, Pansy didn't stop his hands from roaming.

* * *

The day of the match dawned, and as Flint had thought, it was stormy and cold.

"Good luck, Harry!" Pansy said, kissing him on the cheek as the team left breakfast.

Of course, Theo and Blaise made kissing noises, but that was to be expected, really.

"We're going to fucking destroy them!"

"Yeah!"

"Crush them!"

"Yeah!"

"Draco" Flint added, as they all walked out to the pitch, "you get that fucking Snitch"

"AND THEY'RE OFF! SLYTHERIN SEEMS TO BE KEEPING THE SAME TEAM AS LAST YEAR, AS HAVE THE GRYFFINDORS _"_

The wind and rain buffeting Harry, he barely managed to get his fingers in the Quaffle. He raced forward, trying I keep the ball from slipping through his hands.

"POTTER WITH THE QUAFFLE. IS HE GOING TO SHOOT? COME ON OLIVER!"

He drew near, Wood hovering before him. He feinted left-and Wood fell for it.

"POTTER SCORES. 10-0 TO SLYTHERIN. COME ON KATIE!"

Katie was racing towards the goals, Quaffle gripped tightly. A bludger hit her, and Harry heard Derrick's laughter over the roaring rain.

"NICE HIT FROM ONE OF THE WEASLEY'S THERE, AND ITS GRYFFINDOR IN POSSESSION"

The wind and rain made it hard to see exactly what happened, but a few minutes later, Gryffindor was given a penalty shot.

"AND SPINNET SCORES! TAKE THAT! 10-10"

The rain was freezing, chilling Harry to the bone. He hadn't even had the Quaffle for what felt like hours.

The score was now 40-30, to Gryffindor.

"IS THAT THE SNITCH? COME ON DEAN!"

Harry spun around. Dean was ahead, but Draco was steadily gaining.

And the pitch fell silent.

And the rain, which already had been freezing, got colder.

Harry's stomach did a flip, and he looked down.

Dementors. Tens of them, covering the pitch. All looking up, with their cloaks not moving in the wind.

' _There was panting in his ears as he was roughly pulled. A slapping sound from behind as the length moved deeper into him. A woman, screaming his name'_

Harry fainted, falling off his broom as his hands and thighs relaxed their grip.

* * *

"He's waking up!"

"Give him some space"

"Let him have that water Pomfrey left"

Harry slowly opened his eyes, blinking in the harsh light.

"Wha-"

"Here," someone said, pushing a cup into his hands, "drink"

He did so, trying to make sense of the blurred figures.

' _Where am I? What happened? The dementors!"_

"What happened?" He asked as someone pushed his glasses into his hands. He put them on and saw the team and Pansy standing around his bed. He was in the Hospital Wing.

"Dementors," Flint said, as Pansy pushed some chocolate into his hand. "You fell off your broom"

"I thought you were going to die!" Pansy squeaked, covering her face.

"Dumbledore stepped in," Draco said, "and Snape. They did something to you-you started falling much slower, and you kinda bounced when you hit the ground, like off a mattress. And they shot this silvery stuff at the Dementors"

"Never seen Dumbledore look so pissed," Bole said.

"Yeah"

"The game? What happened?"

"We won, of course. Draco got there before Thomas" Flint said, clapping Draco on the back. "Our unbeaten streak continues"

"And I got your broom," Derrick said. "Blew right into my hand. Put it with the others"

"Thanks," Harry said, yawning.

Just then, Madam Pomfrey came in.

"What are you all doing around my patient? He needs rest! And all of you, in your soaking robes?! Change, before I have you all in my beds!"

They shuffled out, Pansy kissing him on the way.

"Now, Potter. You need rest. Drink this"

She handed him a steaming goblet. He was asleep before finishing it.

* * *

As the days moved towards Christmas break, Harry started to get antsy. Not so much the thought of what he would have to do for the initiation, as much as the thought of doing it with an audience. He could tell Draco was getting nervous as well, even though he wouldn't admit it. His workload though prevented him from dwelling on it too much. Draco didn't have that luxury. Even beginning to learn the Patronus charm wasn't enough to totally bring Draco out of his stupor.

Neither of them had any real success with the charm, not being able to produce more than silvery mist.

"That is more than I would expect from a wizard your age" Snape had said when Harry complained about his lack of progress. "As it is, this will be enough to lessen the Dementor's effects on you. Practice, and in time you will achieve a corporeal Patronus"

And the days marched on.

"Harry," Pansy said hesitantly, after a snogging session. Harry felt practically ready to burst. He had finally gotten his hand under her bra, and then she pulled away.

For a fleeting moment, he thought of the Imperius.

"Yeah, babe?"

She smiled. "Will you come to me over Christmas? My parents want to meet you"

' _Gonna be too busy torturing and killing'_

"I'm gonna be at Draco-"

"I know. Maybe just for a lunch, or a tea?"

"Maybe..."

"We'd have more time alone," she said, grinning impishly.

"Well, if you put it like that, how can I say no?"

"Perfect! We'll arrange it all at the beginning of the holiday"

' _Based on what the Dark Lord said, I think I'm going to be seeing your parents a lot earlier than you think'_

* * *

The night before break began, Harry and Draco had a final session with Snape. He went through exactly what they would be expected to do at their initiation again, and the oaths they would be swearing. Then he set them to practicing their Patronus'.

After a few minutes, he sent Draco to the far side of the room so he could speak privately with Harry.

"Muffliato". At Harry's inquiring glance, he said "a useful silencing charm. Draco, or anyone else indeed, cannot hear what we are saying"

' _That is definitely useful'_

"Tell me, Harry," Snape said, in a softer tone than usual, "have you been having any...violent urges?"

Harry didn't even have to think about it.

"Yes"

Snape sighed. "Harry. This is very, very dangerous. For the average person, there is no worry about addiction to the Dark arts. Draco, for example, does not have to fear that, nor do I, provided we watch for it. For you though-"

"I react strongly to it"

"Precisely. Harry, your mind, your soul desires the pleasure it brings you. And so, it causes your thoughts, your emotions to run hotter, which in turn-"

"Makes me want to use the Dark Arts. I know, but-"

"You do not know, you stupid boy! Harry, you have within you the potential to be a truly amazing Wizard. The potential to be the Dark Lord's most favored follower"

Harry nodded. He'd heard all this before.

"But you also have the potential to spend the rest of your life in Azkaban, if you are not given the kiss, that is. You could be great. I will not see you become a cautionary tale, whispered by mothers to scare their children away from the Dark Arts"

"So what do I do?"

"Occlumency, and-"

"I'm already practicing the ducking thing half the day! What more-"

"Guard. Your. Tongue."

Harry shut up, abashed.

"Not only must you clear your mind, but you must watch your emotions. You must know the instant you begin feeling rage, or hate, or fear, and clear your mind. Wipe them away"

"And that will help?" Harry said, scorn filling his voice.

"In part. You should also stop casting those spells unless you absolutely must. Particularly not for stress relief"

"But-"

"Think! When you use them as to relieve your stress or rage, you are teaching yourself that you receive pleasure after feeling those emotions. How do you think your mind reacts to that?"

"It'll make me feel those emotions more," Harry said slowly.

"Exactly. I also worry about your relationship with Miss Parkinson"

"What? Why? Pansy's great, and-"

"For those like you, it may be difficult to separate pleasures. You may feel a heightened desire to cause her pain, or even-"

"I would never!"

' _You thought about Imperioing her cause you were horny. Don't lie'_

"You say that now. How can you ensure of that?"

"So that's it? I have to stay alone forever? And no casting the Dark Arts because-"

"No-one said that, idiot boy! You just have to be far, far more careful. As for the Dark Arts, stay away from the Unforgiveables unless they are necessary"

"Like when?"

"Like in the coming few days, when you will be on exhibit. Or during battle, or interrogation. Do not use them for your own gratification"

"I won't"

"And you will practice your Occlumency, with a focus on your emotions?"

"I will, sir"

"Good. We will discuss this further, after every one of your training sessions. I mean what I said, Harry. You could be great. I will not see you waste that"

"I won't" Harry swore. "I won't"

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	10. Interlude II

**AN: I OWN NONE OF THIS**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M ME**

 **ENJOY**

Interlude II

 _Severus Snape's office, one week before Christmas break_

"I don't know what to do. I-I- I'm-"

"Draco. Calm down. Breath slowly. Calm down"

Draco did, gulping air at first before his breathing slowed. After a few minutes, he started again.

"I'm gonna have to kill again. I always thought it would be easy, nothing. Just a muggle. But I killed him. And I see his face, and I can't sleep" his voice was rising, shaking, "and I remember it, and I don't even know his name, and-"

"You discovered," Snape said, "that murder is far easier in the abstract than in reality"

Draco nodded. Now that he was actually speaking about it, all traces of the dignity that had been bred into him had faded. Tears poured down his face.

"It gets easier"

"That's it? Meaningless-"

"It gets easier, Draco. You have no choice now, not really. You cannot simply turn aside from the path you have chosen. You would die in agony"

"But-I'm a Malfoy, the heir-"

Snape sighed. "Draco, the Dark Lord would feel no qualms whatsoever about ending your line. He would have no qualms about torturing your entire family to death. Families mean nothing to him. Only service does"

"What do I do?" Draco whispered, looking like he had been slapped.

"You could go to Dumbledore, tell him everything. You would spend the rest of your life hated by one side of the war, and never fully trusted by the other"

Draco looked at him in disbelief.

"You could run away. Far, far away. Out of Europe. The Americas, Africa, or Australia. Join the Wizarding community there. Live incognito. You would have nothing, literally be starting from scratch"

Draco opened his mouth, Snape didn't give him a chance to speak.

"Or you could continue onward. Learn to live with your choices and actions"

"How?"

"You were always taught that muggles are animals, were you not?"

"Yes"

"Tell yourself that. Whenever you see the man you killed, tell yourself what a disgusting animal he was. How you were doing the world a favor by ridding it of him. And when that doesn't work, use Occlumency. Clear your mind of all emotions. And if that fails, tell yourself this: it is them or you. In time, you will find it is far, far easier"

"Really?"

"Draco, you are not the first to suffer emotionally after taking a life. And you will not be the last. Keep telling yourself, you have no choice. Either you kill these muggles, or the Dark Lord kills you"

Draco looked slightly better.

"We will discuss this again, a week after you return from break. In the meantime, do as I have said. Let me know if you feel it is urgent"

Draco didn't say anything for a while. Snaps waited. There was something else, something Draco wanted to talk about.

"I'm worried about Harry," he said finally.

"Why?"

"He's been-ever since summer, he's been different. More moody. His jokes have changed too. Much more violent. And he-he-"

Draco inhaled sharply.

"In our first Defence lesson-"

"I know about Harry's boggart, Draco"

Draco looked at him.

"Do you know what he did after he ran out of the class?"

Something bubbled within Snape. Fear.

He shook his head.

"He conjured rabbits. And he tortured them. He said it made him feel better"

"Has he discussed his Boggart's with you?"

"No. Pansy found him outside. She saw what he was doing. He threatened her, told her not to tell. Told her to tell us all that if we talk about his boggart, he'd-he'd"

"He would do what?"

"He'd kill us. And he would, too. I know him. He'd do it, the way he is now"

"I will talk with Harry"

"Sir, I'm-"

"Draco. I will talk with Harry. This is not unexpected. It still is worrying. Thank you for bringing it to my attention"

' _I only hope it isn't too late'_

* * *

 _Zabini residence_

Chiara Zabini pilled her head out of the fireplace, feeling dizzy.

Any firecall gave an uncomfortable feeling, and an international one only made it far worse. She had just finished her fifteenth call over the last few hours.

' _At least I'm done with Italy, for now'_

She gave herself a few minutes to rest, sipping her tea before she would begin contacting Greece, and after that, Spain.

It was exhausting work.

' _But one does not turn aside the Dark Lord's requests'_

* * *

 _Durmstrang Institute, headmaster's office_

Igor Karkaroff raises his glass with trembling fingers. He drank, the firewhiskey burning as it went down. It soothed him, but not enough. He would have to get blind drunk for it to be enough.

He had thought the Durmstrang wards impenetrable. Oh, they weren't quite on the level of Hogwarts', but still.

And the Dark Lord had casually walked through them like they were not even there.

And the Dark Lord was back.

He'd always known, on some level, that gone though he may be, his master was not dead. The continued existence of his Mark served to prove that.

But he'd allowed himself to hope. To hope that the mark would never fade, that it was not just tied to the Dark Lord, but to everyone bearing one.

He'd allowed himself to hope.

"Hope is the ambition of the weak," he said and cackled.

He drank some more.

And the Dark Lord had come to him. And had not been pleased with him.

It wasn't surprising, not really. After all, he had betrayed so many of his fellows.

But now he had a way forward.

He would be allowed to serve, again. He would be protected from those he had sent to Azkaban.

He shivered, thinking of Rookwood's dead eyes.

He had many, many contacts throughout Europe. He knew many who would be happy to serve his Lord.

It was time to start making calls.

He grabbed his box of Floo powder and turned towards the fire.

* * *

 _Malfoy Manor_

Lord Voldemort sat and thought. His plans were progressing well. Faster than expected. Once Severus finished brewing his potion, Barty could be freed, and their work would move along at a greater pace.

' _And I will not be making the same mistakes as last time. I will not focus all my energy in Britain, allowing the rest of Europe to give aid and gather strength. No, I believe they will be having their own problems to deal with'_

He smiled. The work truly was progressing well.

Perhaps he would even actually protect Igor, after all.

Perhaps not. His people in Azkaban deserved a home thrown to them when they got out.

' _What do I tell Potter? The truth? He will learn it soon enough if all goes well. This must be done very, very carefully. He cannot turn against me'  
_

Lord Voldemort began to plan what exactly he would say to Harry after the initiation.

And outside his room, Lucius Malfoy was writing a letter, to be sent to a cousin in France.

And Narcissa was firecalling Germany.

The Dark Lords web stretched over Europe.

And no-one was aware.

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 **FEED ME WITH YOUR THOUGHTS AND CRITIQUE**


	11. Chapter 8

**AN: THERE IS A LONGER AUTHOR'S NOTE COMING AT THE END OF THE CHAPTER. PLEASE READ IT**

 **I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 8

"Welcome, my loyal followers"

The crowd of witches and wizards stood silently. Their eyes were all focused on their master, and not on the four figures beside him.

None of them were masked. The torches floating above their heads cast images upon their faces as they flickered. Images of blood, of bones, of death.

"All of us are here, together. All of us who are free, that is"

One of the wizards, someone Harry didn't know, trembled at that.

"Soon enough, we will all be reunited"

The kneeling figure before Harry moaned.

"For now, we have a celebration. Two promising young wizards are joining our ranks"

The crowd's attention shifted.

Harry recognized some of them. Parents of his friends, Professor Snape.

Others, he had seen around. At platform 9¾, in Diagon and Knockturn Alley.

Many of them were new faces to him.

His mask was hot. Sweat began to run down his forehead.

"And so, in addition to our fine gentlemen, we have guests"

The muggles in the floor were cast into the light. Their hands tied behind their backs, gags in their mouths.

The Dark Lord's wand waved, and the one in front of Draco's gag fell out.

"Please, please-"

"What is your name?"

"John-Jonathan Waksman. Plea-"

"What is your profession, Jonathan?"

"I-I-I'm a pastor. I help the needy. I have a church, ple-"

"Do you have a family, Jonathan?"

The man shook his head, tears running down his face.

"N-I have a sister. Please, I'll do wha-"

"She will miss you terribly"

"NO! Please!" The begging cries ripped from his throat.

"For centuries, muggle religion has been our greatest enemy. They have hunted us down, killed us. Suffer not a witch to live, indeed"

Jonathan was shaking his head, repeating, "no, no, no"

"And why? Because we are better than them! The greatest feats their saints performed, any of us, even fresh from Hogwarts could best. But they fear us. So they kill us"

"Please. I'll do-"

The Dark Lord nodded to Draco.

With a tremor in his voice, the boy spoke.

"Crucio!"

Jonathan screamed, and screamed, and screamed.

Draco lifted the curse, arm shaking.

The crowd watched, a feeling of anticipatory excitement in the air.

"P-p-please. D-don't-"

The Dark Lord nodded again.

' _Please don't throw up, Draco'_

"Avada Kedavra"

The green light flashed.

Jonathan fell with a crash.

The muggle in front of Harry widened his eyes.

"And so, we take our place, as the rightful rulers of the world. One death at a time"

Draco kneeled.

"Remove the mask"

He took it off. There was a gasp from the crowd as someone recognized him. Lucius and Narcissa stood tall, stoic.

"I, Draco Lucius Malfoy, do so swear myself to your service. I am yours, body, mind, and soul. I will fight at your command, kill at your order, die at your word. I am yours, as long as I may live"

The Dark Lord gently kissed Draco on the forehead, before pulling him up.

"Your oath is accepted. May your service be long and fruitful"

"Thank you, my lord" Draco kept his eyes on the floor as he walked off the stage, and stood beside his parents.

He looked up and met Harry's eyes for an instant.

The gag fell off from the muggle before Harry.

' _This is it'_. A tremor ran through him.

"What is your name?"

"Oh father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name"

The Dark Lord nodded to Harry.

With slippery fingers, he raised his wand.

"Crucio!"

Absolute pleasure.

The Dark Lord's fist clenched. Harry dropped the spell.

"What is your name?"

"Th-th-thy k-kingdom come, t-thy will-"

"Again"

"Crucio!"

Harry shook as the room filled up with screams.

The fist clenched. The spell dropped.

"What is your name?"

"G-Gordon" the man gasped.

"Well, Gordon. Do you have any family?"

"I have a father"

"He will soon have no son"

"You misunderstand me" Gordon smiled at the Dark Lord. "He is your father, too. All of yours. And he-"

"Again"

"Crucio!"

An eternity seemed to pass before the Dark Lord clenched his fist. Gordon continued screaming even once the spell was over.

"Make him renounce his faith," the Dark Lord said to Harry.

' _How the fuck do I do that?'_

Still coasting in the waves of ecstasy, he merely nodded. When Gordon calmed down, Harry spoke to him, gently.

"Will you renounce?"

"F-f-for s-six hours did the s-savior s-suffer on th-the c-c-cross. I-I-I can h-handle a bit more"

"Crucio"

He screamed like an animal. Something tore in his throat, and he coughed out blood along with his screams.

Through the pleasure, a troublesome thought came through.

' _You're trying to take away his last, his only comfort. What the fuck is wrong with you?_ '

He dismissed the thought. If he disobeyed the Dark Lord, here, now.

He shivered at the thought.

' _Besides, you never got any comfort in their world. Why does he deserve any?_ '

Harry dropped the spell.

"My lord," he said, half bowing, "may I try something different?"

Voldemort nodded.

' _If I fuck this up, I'll look like such an idiot. Oh, fuck. I should have practiced this before, instead of just reading about it'_

He jerked Gordon's hands over so that they were now in front of him. Something gave a crack in the man's shoulder at the rough treatment.

He aimed his wand, trying to keep his concentration steady.

' _Remember what the book said! If you lose concentration, he could die!'_

A part of his mind gibbered at what he was about to try.

"Do you renounce your faith?". His voice was far steadier than his nerves.

"I-I- you're just a boy!"

Hot rage filled him for a second.

' _Everyone is watching. You have to do it, now'_

Pointing his wand at Gordon's fingertips, he cried out "Capiopellis!"

His concentration stayed steady.

The spell worked.

Gordon's skin began peeling backward off his fingers, in thick, large strips.

It moved backward swiftly, first exposing up to one knuckle, then the second.

Drops of blood fell, the rest stayed pooled in his fingers.

Gordon watched in horror and seemed not to process what was happening. Then he screamed.

' _What the fuck am I doing! How can I do this?! It's not-'_

Harry's concentration wavered. Just for a second.

A spray of blood erupted from Gordon's hands. It splattered Harry, covering his eyes with a red film. Gordon's screams reached a crescendo.

Sickened, Harry said "Reddiopellis"

The skin curved back down, covering the exploded flesh. It was much paler than it had been before.

Harry almost threw up as a drop of blood rolled into his mouth.

"Cr-Crucio!"

Gordon screamed. Harry smiled.

"Let's see if we can get all the way to your elbows this time"

"NO! No, no, no"

Gordon was shaking his head, blood dripping from his mouth.

"Will you renounce your faith?"

"No"

Harry raised his wand.

"No, no, no, n-"

"Capiopellis"

Through the tortured screams, Harry made out words.

"Reddiopellis"

"P-p-please. J-just kill me already. Just kill me!"

The Dark Lord spoke "not until you renounce your false god, and accept your true rulers"

"N-no. P-please, j-j-just-"

"Crucio"

It took much longer for the screaming to stop after Harry ended the curse.

' _Did I break him?'_

"St-st-st-stop. Pl-please"

"Only you can make it stop," Harry said, gently.

"Capi-"

"No! I'll do it"

Voldemort gave a small chuckle.

"I r-r-renounce my faith," Gordon said, ugly tears coursing down his face, mingling with the blood.

"I-I accept you as my masters," he said with a sob.

Voldemort nodded to Harry.

"Avada Kedavra!"

Gordon died with a grateful look on his face.

Harry kneeled, suddenly conscious of all the eyes focused on him.

' _They're all gonna know exactly what I just did! They're gonna know!'_

' _It's too late to turn back. Far, far too late'_

He pulled off his mask at his Lord's command, revealing a blood and sweat-streaked face. One, that most of the Wizarding world would still be able to recognize.

There was a lot more than one gasp this time.

He clearly heard a man's voice saying "what the fuck!"

He almost laughed.

"I, Harry James Potter, do so swear myself to your service. I am yours, body, mind, and soul. I will fight at your command, kill at your order, die at your word. I am yours, as long as I may live"

Cold lips grazed against his forehead. Directly against his scar.

Long fingers gripped his shoulder as he was hauled up.

"You who have been called my downfall. Your oath is accepted. You are accepted. You are mine! Long may you serve, and may your service always be as exemplary and wondrous as it has been this evening"

"Lucius"

"Yes, my lord"

"Have your elf clean this up. Unless you enjoy having your ballroom polluted with filth"

As Lucius summoned Tufty, who set to her task without the tiniest hint of shock, the Dark Lord continued.

"For now, let us celebrate. We have just inducted fresh blood. Alas, until Hogwarts is more firmly in our grasp, they shall not be marked, but know this"

Fire burned in the Dark Lord's eyes as he spoke to the crowd.

"They are mine. Any who think to gain favor by pushing them down will face my displeasure. They are mine"

* * *

Far away from the extravagant celebrations, far away from where Draco and Harry were being clapped on the back and poured cups of burning drinks, stood the Ministry of Magic.

Amongst the lowest floors of the Ministry of Magic could be found the Department of Mysteries.

Within the Department of Mysteries, was the Hall of Prophecy.

No-one entered the Hall of Prophecy, not often at least. Since the banning of soul magic, there had been fewer witches and wizards willing to force their souls into strange and unnatural pathways. Into pathways that allowed them to glimpse a future.

Very, very few people alive even understood how prophecy worked.

Some believed that prophecies were by their very nature self-fulfilling. That by hearing and acting upon a prophecy, one created a chain of events leading to its fulfillment.

Albus Dumbledore subscribed to this view, based on his understanding of divination.

He was wrong.

Some believed that a prophecy spoke absolute truth, of what was to come. Tom Riddle, better known as Lord Voldemort subscribed to this view, based on his understanding of divination.

He was wrong.

In every situation, myriads of choices arise. For every choice, a new stream of events occurs, leading to more choices, more possible futures.

A seer was someone who was able to catch a glimpse of the threads that ran through all of these possible futures, no matter the choice.

The threads that ran through almost all possible futures, at least.

There was a reason that the words of a prophecy were always unclear. Always giving room for multiple interpretations. The future is not set in stone.

In a million worlds, the Dursleys did not turn away from their nephew in his time of need.

In a million worlds, Dumbledore did not leave Harry in an orphanage.

In a million worlds, Harry was not raped. Harry was not bullied. He had a healthy childhood. He was loved and cared for. He grew up to be a balanced individual.

In a million worlds, Harry was not sorted into Slytherin.

In a million worlds, Harry did not form a relationship with Quirrel, Snape, or the Malfoys.

In one world, one solitary world, Harry swore to serve the Dark Lord.

It was a pity no one was in the Hall of Prophecies right then. They would, if their senses were attuned correctly, have witnessed something incredible.

Centered around row 97, around a rather unassuming cloudy ball at the end of the row, reality shifted.

There was a feeling like the world moved sideways.

And the little plaque changed. A very slight change, but one with enormous consequences.

It now read.

 **S.P.T. to A.P.W.B.D**

 **Dark Lord**

 **And (?)(?)**

But no one came down there.

And it would be a long time before someone did.

 **AN:ITS VERY POSSIBLE THAT THIS CHAPTER WAS DISTASTEFUL AND OFFENSIVE TO SOME, PARTICULARLY IF YOU ARE RELIGIOUS. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE RELIGION IS AN IMPORTANT AND HOT POINT IN MANY PEOPLES LIVES.**

 **I DO NOT MEAN TO DISPARAGE ANY RELIGIOUS GROUP AT ALL. I PERSONALLY FIND SOME OF THE THINGS DONE IN THIS CHAPTER ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING, BUT VERY IMPORTANT TO THE STORY. ALSO, VOLDEMORT WILL USE ANYTHING AS A SCAPEGOAT TO FURTHER HIS POWER. MUGGLE RELIGIONS HAPPEN TO WORK WELL WITH THAT.**

 **NEXT TIME WE SEE FROM VOLDEMORT'S P.O.V, YOU'LL UNDERSTAND WHY HE SET THINGS UP THE WAY HE DID**

 **AND JUST TO MAKE THINGS ABSOLUTELY CLEAR, THIS IS NOT A DIMENSION/REALITY/TIMELINE HOPPING STORY. THE WORLD AS A WHOLE IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE DRASTICALLY (AT LEAST, NOT IMMEDIATELY) BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED AT THE END OF THIS CHAPTER.**

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	12. Chapter 9

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 9

Harry woke up with his head pounding.

' _What the fuck'_

His whole body ached. He felt like someone had beaten him with an iron club.

He groaned, clutching his head.

Blurry eyed, he managed to find his glasses. He blinked at this state of dress.

He was still wearing the same clothes he had worn the night before.

There were splatters of blood all over them.

' _How the fuck could I have done that? What's wrong with me?'_

His thoughts were coming sluggishly.

With another groan, he turned over. On the bedside table, there was a smoking potion in a black goblet, placed beside a jug of water.

He read the note below it.

 _ **Hangover potion.**_

 _ **Drink upon awakening. Follow with water.  
**_

He drank it. It tasted gross but still better than his tongue had.

By the time he finished showering, he was feeling human again.

Hazy memories of the night before began coming into his mind.

'" _So, you're the one Pansy's so enamored with", the familiar looking wizard had said, after congratulating Harry on his induction._

" _I hope so" Harry had replied, causing Mr. Parkinson to laugh raucously._

" _Well, I'm glad to see you're worthy of her attention. Be seeing you later this week"_

 _As he walked away, someone else refilled Harry's cup'_

Harry got dressed and made his way downstairs.

' _They all saw what you did! How brutal it was and-'_

' _I obeyed the Dark Lord's order, that's it. Besides, they were all respectful last night. I think'_

He could clearly remember up until the third firewhiskey. After that, things started getting blurry.

From what he could remember though, he had been treated with-respect. Respect, and acceptance.

He smiled at the memory.

* * *

"The sleeper awakes!"

Draco was sitting at the dining room table, a plate full of crumbs and bacon bits in front of him.

"Tufty! Bring Harry his food!"

Seconds later the elf appeared, bearing plates piled up.

"So, how did that potion work?"

"Like magic," Harry said, grinning.

"Good. You really overdid it last night, mate"

"I was just doing what the Dark Lord-"

"Not that" Draco flushed. "I meant how much you drank. We had to carry you to bed. Wasn't pretty"

' _Shit'_

"Damn. Sorry"

"Don't worry. Do you even remember any of the party?"

"Bits of it. You?"

Draco laughed. "I didn't drink quite as much as you. Not even close"

"Still. We're in, now"

"Yeah. I can barely believe it. I mean, we're just kids."

"Not anymore," Harry said softly.

"No" Draco looked down. "Not anymore"

Silence descended on the table as Harry ate.

"When were you planning on visiting Pansy?"

"Dunno. Was gonna just owl her. Maybe tomorrow? Got any plans?"

"Not really. I don't know if you remember, but there's a meeting coming up. He wants everyone to be there"

There was no doubt who Draco was referring to.

"Do you know when?"

"Nope. Sometime the week before we go back, though"

"Where's it gonna be?"

"Here, of course"

"Cool"

Draco exhaled loudly. "Yeah. He wants to talk about His plans, and what He wants us all to be doing"

Harry frowned. "He can't want too much from us, can he? I mean, we're still in school?"

Draco looked at Harry blankly.

"He can want anything from us. Remember what we swore?"

' _To die at your word'_

Harry shivered.

"Let's do something fun," Draco said, breaking the awkward silence. "Wanna go fly a bit?"

"Sounds great. Let's do it"

* * *

"Where'd you learn that spell from?"

"What, the flaying one?"

"Yeah"

"That book your dad gave me. Shit, I was so scared. I'd never actually tried it before. I was so sure I was gonna fuck it up"

"You managed it on your first try?" Draco asked incredulously.

"Having the Dark Lord staring at you does wonders for your concentration"

"Yeah. Never mind all the other people"

"You can say that again"

"You know, I still can't believe we're in. It's just so crazy"

"Totally. I wish he'd have Marked us, though"

Draco goggles at him.

"Seriously? I heard it hurts almost as bad as a Crucio. And that's beside the fact that there is no way we'd be able to hide it. Especially not in the locker room"

Harry floundered. How could he explain, that being Marked would signify a total acceptance, something he'd practically never experienced before? How to explain that it would mean being a part of something, just being another person who's a part of it, not having people staring all the time? That not being Marked meant that there was something different about him than the other Death Eaters. He couldn't. So he settled with saying, "yeah, but still".

"Did you write to Pansy?"

"Yup," Harry said, with a popping noise.

"And?"

Harry tried to imitate his girlfriend's voice. "I can't wait! My parents are so excited to meet you, and I'll show you my manor and everything"

"Her parents are so excited to meet you?" Draco laughed. "Merlin, they're keeping it secret well"

"Yeah. I'm just looking forward to having some time alone with her"

"Of course you are," Draco said, raising his fingers in a v in front of his mouth, "but I think she might be even more excited".

"Stop it," Harry said, laughing. "We haven't quite done that"

"So what have you done?"

"None of your business," Harry said primly. Draco chortled.

"Has she given your wand a shake?"

"Dracooo" Harry whined.

"Has she caught your Snitches?"

"Come on man. Don't make me practice spells on you" Harry raised his wand as he spoke.

Instantly, Draco's entire demeanor changed.

"Don't even joke about that" he hissed, "Don't".

"Dra-"

"No, I'm fucking serious Harry. Don't"

' _He's scared of me. He saw what I can do, and now he's scared of me'_

A part of Harry wanted to cry at that. Another part started getting angry.

He heard Snape's voice.

' _Clear your mind'_

And he did.

He banished all the emotions he was feeling and discovered something very interesting.

He could understand exactly where Draco was coming from.

"Sorry, Draco. I get it, I do. After what you've seen me do, I get why it would be scary for you. I really do"

Draco was quiet for a moment, before asking, in a soft voice.

"How do you live with it? The things you've done?"

Only one fact held back Harry's anger. There was no accusation in Draco's voice. There was fear, and worry, and stress.

' _He's asking for himself, idiot'_

"You just-learn to, I guess. It's like you told me once. They're not human"

"But-"

"Yeah, yeah. They look like us, and they sound like us. But I've been thinking about it a ton. The shit they put me through. No wizard could sit back while that was happening to to a magical child"

' _Dumbledore did. And don't forget what those Ravenclaw girls did. They're not really that different-'_

"But they do. They did. They're just not like us-"

"That doesn't help! I can tell myself that, but I still just see him pleading and-"

"That's cause you don't believe it. You need to totally believe it. You don't care that those rabbits squealed when we practiced on them, do you?"

"No, but it's not the same-"

"That's up to you to decide"

"I guess"

* * *

Harry visited Parkinson Manor the next day. It was a beautiful place, not quite as large or as richly decorated as Malfoy Manor, but then again, few places were.

Mr. and Mrs. Parkinson were very pleased to finally meet Harry and introduced themselves to him as Lance and Maeve. Harry managed to keep the grin off of his face as they made their introductions.

' _Last time they saw me, I had blood all over my face'_ , he thought, simultaneously wanting to laugh and feeling disgusted.

Pansy was pretty excited to have Harry in her house. She took him on a tour of it, (not letting him spend more than a few minutes browsing the library), which ended in her room.

Her bed was-freaking enormous. And soft.

Harry sank into it gratefully, legs aching from walking around the large property.

"You like it?"

"Yeah. Its a bit lonely though, without you on it"

Smirking, Pansy dropped into the bed next to him.

Almost immediately, they were kissing, his hand running through her long her.

His other hand gripped one of hers.

She didn't pull away when he moved her hand down to his throbbing tumescence.

"Wow"

He lowered his robes and underwear.

"Harry, I don't kno-"

"Please, babe. Please. Help me out, here"

"She bit her lip as he looked at him, innocent worry naked on her face.

' _One word and I could make her do anything-'  
_

' _What the fuck is wrong with you?'_

"What do I do?"

"Just stroke it".

After a scourgify, Harry kissed her again, basking in the afterglow.

"I love you" he whispered, hugging her close.

"Not as much as I love you," She said back.

"Do so"

"Totally not"

"Totally do"

* * *

They settled into a nice routine over the break. Flying, when the weather allowed it, relaxing, reading.

Practicing spells.

Harry would Floo over to Pansy almost every day. At some point during his visit, she would ease his aching need. He returned the favor, of course, reveling in her smell and taste on his fingers.

' _Mine'_

And yet, he wanted more. She was amazing, no doubt, and it was nothing to even compare to getting himself off, but he wanted more.

And he was afraid of even bringing it up, afraid of ruining the amazing thing they had going.

But he could just imagine her head bent over him, running his fingers through her hair, and-

' _One word is all I need. Just one word. She would never need more than one crucio'_

He cleared his mind, removing all emotion, all need.

' _We'll move further when we do. This is great, for now'_

They had the usual party with all their friends. Daphne scowled when Theo, of course, made some lewd comment when Harry and Pansy tried, unsuccessfully, to sneak back in after disappearing. Harry just smiled while Pansy blushed furiously.

* * *

And then, a few nights before returning to Hogwarts, the Dark Lord called a meeting.

The East Ballroom was set up totally differently.

' _Well, of course. They weren't gonna just leave the stage and blood and bodies, were they?'_

There was a long table running down the length of the room, with place for a good sixty or so seats.

The Dark Lord sat at the head, in his throne-like, gilded chair.

He beckoned for Harry and Draco to sit at the two seats closest to him- Harry on his right, Draco, on the left.

Slowly, the seats filled up.

Harry recognized the faces from his initiation.

He remembered some of the names and half-remembered bits of conversations they had.

Once the table was full, the Dark Lord raised his hand. Silence immediately fell.

"For now, my return is still unknown by the Wizarding world. For now, it must be kept this way. We have time to prepare, to plan for their reactions when it is revealed.

Lucius"

"Yes, my Lord?"

"If Fudge is removed from power, as he most certainly will be once war is declared, who would take his place?"

Lucius seemed to think for a few moments.

"Assuming Dumbledore does not take it, probably either Amelia Bones or Rufus Scrimgeour. Possibly Artemius Faulkner, but I don't believe that as likely, my Lord"

"I want articles to discredit them. Not much, but some. Do it slowly. In the meantime, who can you position to take the role as minister? Someone who would be susceptible to the Imperius."

"I believe Pius Thicknesse would be perfect for that, my Lord. He is not well known for his strength of will or mind"

"Excellent. Do it very slowly, all of you with pull."

"My Lord?"

"Yes, Ian?"

"What is the time frame we're looking at? How long do we have to get him into position?"

The Dark Lord was silent for a moment. "Between one and a half and two years"

"It shall be done"

"Good. Lucius, you will be spending some time with the group in France. Narcissa will be visiting Hungary. Chiara, you will go to Italy, Greece, and Spain. Rowle, I want you to take the group in Estonia. They must know not to act at all until they receive my order. I will be visiting them as well"

The Dark Lord looked at the people he had named.

"Not even the most minor actions. For now, they are to train and prepare. I will be most displeased if my orders are disobeyed. In fact"

He smiled at Harry, "Perhaps I will have Harry punish any who deserve it"

There was light laughter around the room.

For an instant, Harry bristled, before the realization came to him.

' _They're not laughing at me!'_

"Severus. What is Dumbledore planning at the moment?"

Snape spoke with his usual, lazy drawl.

"He is planning an event to foster greater international relations. He wishes to host the Triwizard Tournament at Hogwarts, next year. I believe he is currently in talks with Madam Maxime of Beuxbatons"

"Interesting. What else?"

"I do not think he believes you have regained physical form, my Lord. However, he never believed you to be dead, and the events of last year, as well as Quirrell's disappearance, have definitely raised his suspicions about you. He also plans to bring Harry closer to him"

"Oh?" The Dark Lord said, watching Harry.

"Yes, my Lord. He is afraid that Harry is in prime position to hate muggles and fall to our ideology"

"He should be afraid"

The room laughed, again.

"What does he plan to do about this?"

"I believe he will offer Harry private lessons. On Magical Theory, or Transfiguration, whichever Harry is more interested in"

"You will take him up on his offer, Harry. Of course, give him no indication of your allegiance. You could be a most useful spy"

"Yes, my Lord"

"Now, Harry, Draco, Severus. I want you watching the sixth and seventh-years. I want a list of those who you think are appropriate for recruitment"

They nodded.

"Very well. I will be checking up on all of your progress. Do not disappoint me"

The day before returning to Hogwarts, Harry had a private meeting with the Dark Lord.

"Well, Harry, you performed most admirably at your initiation. I am proud to count you as one of my followers"

"Thank you my Lord," Harry said, eyes downcast.

"As I recall, I said I would tell you about the events leading up to your parents' death, did I not?"

"You did, my Lord"

"Let it never be said that Lord Voldemort does not keep his word. Very well. There had been a prophecy, which one of my spies overheard, announcing a possible threat to me. As a result, your parents, and another family, went into hiding"

"Why? My Lord"

"Because, Harry, the prophecy foretold a child who would have the possibility of challenging me. You, Harry, fit the other criteria the prophecy said of such a child"

"Me? But, but I wouldn't-"

"The prophecy never said you would have the inclination to be a challenge. Or indeed, be successful. Nevertheless, I would not sit idly by while there is a possible threat"

"I-I-"

"Harry, Harry. You have given me ample reason to trust you. See that you never give me reason to mistrust you"

Harry gulped. He didn't even want to imagine what would happen in that case. Only that it would make what he had done to Gordon seem like a kindness.

"Your parents hid well, making use of the Fidelius charm"

"What is that?"

Voldemort smiled coldly, no humor reaching his burning eyes.

"It is a brilliant charm. A secret is given to one person to guard. Unless that person gives it up, the secret cannot be revealed. If the charm is cast correctly, as indeed, it was, it is unbreakable. I could have been standing outside your parents house, but without the information directly from the secret keeper, I would not have been able to see it"

"Wow"

"Indeed. Dumbledore cast the charm. At first, Sirius Black was the secret keeper. He was your father's closest friend, his best man. Your godfather. And then, something wonderful happened"

"What?"

"One of your father's other friends was secretly one of my followers. Black became concerned, he felt it would be too obvious that he was the choice, and that it would only be a matter of time until he was captured and had the secret tortured out of him. And so, telling no-one other than your parents, he switched secret keepers, giving it over to my servant. The rest, as they say, is history"

"But why is Black believed to have served you?"

"As I said. He told no-one of the switch. However, he figured out what must have happened, and went after my servant. My servant, Peter Pettigrew, must have faked his death, made it seem like Black had killed him. He still lives though"

"Really?"

' _The man who caused my parents death is still alive? I should-'_

' _On your Lord's orders! You would have to kill yourself too! You dare not betray him! Besides, Black indirectly caused it, too'_

"Truly. His Mark is still active. Where exactly he is, I can't tell. He could be behind powerful wards, or he could simply be transformed. He is an animagus"

"Oh"

' _Even if you were willing to betray him. If the Dark Lord can't track him, you definitely can't'_

"Harry, I wish to ask you something. How would you feel about your childhood being revealed in the newspaper?"

' _Not a fucking chance-'_

' _You swore an oath! To die if he wants!'_

"You see, it could accomplish much. It would lead to some distrust of Dumbledore. It would make people more distrustful of Muggles. It could do a lot"

"It is my Lord's choice"

"Harry, Harry" the Dark Lord laughed. "I would not suffer any ill effects as a result of this. You would. Tell me, truly. What do you think?"

' _NO! I don't fucking want to be looked at with pity! With-'_

' _You swore an oath!'_

Swallowing thickly, Harry spoke. "There's stuff I wouldn't want to come out"

"Like what?"

"I killed two muggles. I don't want to be looked at as a murderer-"

"If your actions were left out, and only the fact that you had been abused was discussed, without too many details. How would you feel?"

' _I don't-'_

' _You swore an oath!'_

"If it would really achieve so much," Harry said slowly, "then I guess I'd be ok with it"

"Excellent. We will discuss what will happens closer to the time"

The Dark Lord watched Harry leave the room with a feral grin twisting his snake-like features.

' _Mine!'_

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	13. Interlude III

**AN:I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Interlude III

 _Severus Snape's office_

Severus Snape set his empty cup on the table. He refilled it.

Drank.

Refilled it again.

' _This is becoming quite problematic'_ he thought wryly.

After many years of not having more than a single drink in company, he found himself drinking himself into oblivion on a regular basis. Alone.

' _Its the only way to silence the thoughts'_

How ironic, that he had been the one to advise Draco on dealing with guilt.

' _Physician, heal thyself_ '

But he had seen what Harry had done. He had seen how the boy looked afterward. Lily's eyes, reveling in torture and murder.

He drank.

He had seen how the Dark Lord had looked at the boy.

Harry belonged to Him, now.

And he, Severus Snape, who had been trying for years to heal the rifts between his Slytherins and the rest of the school.

He would have to encourage them. To push students into traveling the same hellish path that he had taken.

And Harry. Lily's son. The child who had been unable to even get off his bed now had an outlet for his rage and hate. He now had a Master who would be more than happy to have him indulge in those feelings.

Severus Snape drank and wept.

Behind him, a small cauldron bubbled.

It would soon be ready.

* * *

 _Parkinson Manor_

"Surely there is-"

"Give up, Maeve! There's nothing we can do!"

"There must be!"

Lance sighed. "Maeve, tell me, dear. Did you see how the Dark Lord looked at him?"

Flustered, Maeve nodded.

"Did it remind you of anything?"

"Well-"

"Because it reminded me of exactly how he used to look at Bellatrix or Barty when they did something to please Him. And you know he would forgive them anything"

"I know, but-"

"No buts. We have to face the reality. Our daughter is involved with one of the Dark Lord's chosen. Harry stands higher than us"

"I know" she shrieked. "That's exactly why I'm afraid!"

"Because you know that there is nothing we can do! The Dark Lord would allow him to get away with anything! If we complained, He would punish us!"

Sobbing, his wife clutches him.

"His eyes, Lance. I would rather Pansy was alone with Greyback than with him. That look he had-"

"I know! But there is nothing we can do! You have to accept that! We just have to hope Pansy doesn't upset him"

"What if she does? What is wants to hurt her, to-"Maeve sniffed.

"I don't think he is that far gone. We have to hope. Hope that he isn't as far gone as that. If he is, well then. May Mordred and Morgana protect our little girl"

* * *

 _Shrieking Shack_

Sirius Black paced the room, looking down at himself every so often to make sure that he was still a man.

He hadn't yet worked out a foolproof plan to ensure that this wasn't a dream. That this wasn't a hallucination created in the moments as his soul was sucked out.

' _I'm going to eat that rat's heart. I'll make him watch'_

Dimly, he realized that he wasn't exactly sane. Well, twelve years of no company but Dementors and the ravings of his mad cousin could definitely do that to anyone.

' _The screams'_

He laughed. It was so simple. There were no screams pervading his thoughts. There always had been.

"Ergo, I'm really not there"

He giggled. _'Did I really make friends with a cat?'_

He thought so. It didn't have a feel of a dream, at least. It must have been real.

' _Once I've turned the rat in, I'll be free! I'll be able to look after Harry!'_

That would be especially necessary if Bellatrix was right. Bellatrix and the others. They seemed so convinced that Voldemort wasn't gone. Maybe they were right?

' _All the more reason for Harry to have someone looking after him. Once that cat brings me the rat'_

He laughed at that thought, ' _I'll be free! Maybe I'll even let the cat have the rest of its toes?_ '

He kicked the chair. ' _I can't kill him. I shouldn't have ever tried. I should have been there for Harry. I should have been there for James and Lily'_

He covered his face with his hands and wept, hysterical laughter breaking through now and then.

* * *

 _The White Wyvern_

Mundungus Fletcher carefully did not look at the table behind him, instead sinking deeper into his chair and sipping his rum.

' _Another inch or two'_

He could nearly hear what they were saying. Not more than brief snatches, a word here and there, but nearly.

Greyback, Yaxley, Rowle. Nothing good came when those types got together. Especially when they began meeting with greater frequency.

Someone joined the table behind him, giving a grunted greeting.

He raised his glass and inspected it, before drinking.

' _Crabbe today. Nott yesterday. Malfoy the day before. And some mention of their Dark Lord. Not enough real info for Old Albus. He wants something substantial'_

After a while, the meeting behind him came to a close. He pulled his hat down further as the motley crew left the bar.

' _Nothing interesting today. Could tell Albus I heard them say Potter's name, but he'll want more. Need to get nearer'_

One of these days, he'd get near enough to actually hear what they were saying.

One of these days.

* * *

 _Malfoy Manor_

Lord Voldemort warmed his hands in front of the fire, content. His plans were moving along swiftly, his goals slowly drawing into sight. Not as swiftly as he could hope for, but _'at this stage of the game, secrecy is paramount. Let the enemy only know you have made a move once winning is already in sight.'_

After all the years, all the decades. Control of Britain was in sight. In under ten years, unless he totally missed his guess.

And after that, the rest of Europe.

He smiled, stroking his snake's head.

And Harry.

Harry was his, now. Truly his.

Killing was one thing. Killing in public, another. Breaking a man's spirit, on your lord's orders?

Well, that was another thing entirely.

It had been a risk, that. Placing Harry on the spot. Of course, it wasn't entirely up to chance. Had Harry seemed unable to continue with his work _would have simply used the Imperius to force Gordon to give up earlier'_.

But that had not been necessary. In fact, Gordon had only been compelled to renounce once Voldemort feared Harry would accidentally kill it.

' _But now he has seen. They all have. Muggles will never bow down to us. It is not enough to have them subservient. They must be destroyed, entirely. Their allegiance will never truly be to us'_

Let muggles keep their religion. It would only continue to make an excellent scapegoat.

And Harry. He was almost too easy to manipulate. He simply needed to be shown some care and he crumbled. So simple. ' _Unless I am mistaken, Bella will have to compete with him for my compliments'_

Lord Voldemort laughed softly. Harry was his. And soon enough, the whole world would be.

' _Mine'_

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	14. Chapter 10

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

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 **ENJOY**

Chapter 10

Not long into the ride back to Hogwarts, Harry and Pansy disappeared together for a little.

Theoretically, they were going to get some alone time (and for some sweet fun), but Harry had an ulterior motive as well.

On their way back to their compartment, Harry dragged Pansy with him to Flint.

When Draco and he had discussed their orders from the Dark Lord, they had immediately began brainstorming. Who would be suitable? Who had not just the right ideology, but the strength of mind, the raw brutality to go through with it?

They both had come to the same conclusion.

Marcus Flint.

They had other ideas too, of course, but none that made as much sense as Flint. You only had to see Flint get in a rage and have a rant to know where his feelings lie. As for his willingness to act on those feelings. Well. Flint hadn't spoken to Harry outside of quidditch stuff from the time the basilisk had been killed until the beginning of the new year. Bole had told Harry that Flint was extremely pissed off that Harry had helped get rid of the basilisk, thereby preventing any mudblood deaths.

Flint could definitely fit.

And Flint's best friend was Octavius Avery.

Avery's had Death Eater family members-an aunt and uncle. Harry had met them at his initiation. And his parents were supposedly sympathetic to the cause. Him being best friends with Flint, simply made it more likely that Flint would be willing to join. And Avery too, of course.

So Harry planned to find them, maybe mention something about what a great break he had away from the muggles of his orphanage. Try to lead them on that way.

Unfortunately, and honestly quite predictably, they weren't alone.

All Harry really achieved was saying hi to the group of sixth and seventh years. He managed to cover up his random intrusion by asking Flint about Quidditch practice, and left shortly after that.

Of course, Theo made a comment when they came back into the compartment. Something about how they were gone a while and Pansy's knees must be hurting.

This time, Astoria reached him first.

While he rubbed his cheek, he asked: "why do you guys always have to slap me?"

Astoria answered primly, "Because you say stupid things, and you don't know how to talk to a lady"

"Exactly Theo" Blaise commented, "women like to be spoken to softly, gently. Unless they like dirty talk, in which case-"

Astoria slapped him, too.

"Daphne! Get your sister out of here!"

"Are all boys like this?"

Daphne looked at her little sister with fond exasperation. "Pretty much. There's only one thing on their minds-"

"Two things. And they're on your chest"

Theo managed to dodge the next slap, and quickly cast a body bind on Astoria.

"Ha! Got you!"

He looked up to see Daphne's wand in his face.

"Fuck"

"Wouldn't you like to?" Daphne said softly, lips curled into an odd smile.

The compartment echoed with laughter as Theo removed the spell.

"Well" Astoria squeaked as she flounced out the compartment, "I'm going to find a more mature group of people to sit with"

* * *

Daphne's hand twitched a few times before she lowered her wand.

"Settle down, settle down. I'm glad you're all refreshed from your break, but we only have one hour a week, so settle down"

Professor Waffling looked over her class. Then she heaved a great sigh, before beginning to speak.

"Every year, at least, every year that there is a class, I have this same difficulty. This will perhaps be the most difficult lesson of the year, for numerous reasons. One is that the subject matter is extremely foreign and esoteric. Another is that none of you have the background knowledge needed to even begin to comprehend this. The third is that you all will, inevitably have preconceived notions. I ask that you set aside anything you think you may know about the soul, for the duration of this lesson"

The room was absolutely silent.

"Now, when asked what the soul is, many people will answer something about it giving you personality, or sentience, or the like. We, who have spent time discussing how it affects our magical abilities, will think of an additional property to it. However, the soul is..."

She paused for a few moments, deep in thought.

"The soul is far more and far less than all that. The soul has an...anatomy to it. The discussion of this anatomy is what makes this class particularly difficult"

She raised her hand, arm outstretched.

"Even those of you who have no particular interest in anatomy would still be able to draw a diagram of the human hand. You would be able to point out the palm, the fingers, and thumb, the knuckles. Purely through experience, you know of the anatomy of the hand. However, none of you have ever seen a soul. It is invisible the vast majority of the time. Even if you have, somehow caught a glimpse, you would simply see an amorphous silver blob. We need to discuss that which has no visible form"

When the sound of scratching quills died down, Waffling continued.

"As we have been discussed, it is the properties of the soul which separate us from muggles. It is the properties of the soul which separate magical and non-magical creatures. What else in nature can be divided into magical and non-magical groups?"

There was an instant of silence before Granger's hand shot into the air. When Waffling pointed at her, she spoke in a tone of breathless wonder. "Plants"

"Indeed. Now, if the soul is what gives magical properties, and the soul also gives sentience and personality, what gives magical plants and fungi the magic they possess? None of them can be said to have true sentience. Even Mandrakes, are not truly capable of thought. How does it work? What separates them from the non-magical plants?"

Harry's mind raced. _'I never even thought about that. Maybe the way they're planted? Or magic is used on them, to make them how they are?_ '

"This leads us to the anatomy of the soul. Let us image the soul as having multiple parts. One part governing magic, one part governing sentience, one part governing personality, and so on. Magical plants' souls differ in that, even though they have the part of the soul that governs magic, they do not contain the other parts"

"How can we be sure?"

"10 points from Ravenclaw. If you ask a question without raising your hand again, Boot, it'll be 50 and a detention. Soul Magic experimentation on plants has conclusively proven that there is no sentience to be found whatsoever. Yes, Patil?"

"You mentioned that the soul can be visible sometimes. When is this so?"

"Good question. During the Dementor's kiss, is one such time. Certain diseases cause the soul to be visible for a few instants at the time of death, as do some highly illegal spells. There is an artifact in the Department of Mysteries as well, which allows one to view their soul"

' _I wonder what I would see'_ Harry thought, fascinated.

"Now, there are other differences between the souls of plants and those of humans. The soul of a human leaves the body upon death. However, even once a plant is 'killed' the soul still remains bound to it. Yes, Potter?"

"Where do human souls go after death?"

Waffling looked at him with an odd expression.

"No one knows for sure. Is it a time of reward and punishment? Do souls get recycled? So they simply move on, to a different world, a different dimension? No one knows. As a general rule, ghosts will not answer these questions at all. They will simply ignore them. The most any ghost has been willing to say is that they had the option of 'moving on' and they didn't take it. No one has been able to conclusively prove what happens to a ghost after an exorcism either. We simply don't know"

She glanced at her watch and shook herself.

"As a result of a student's foolish actions some five years ago, I no longer give permission slips for the Restricted Section. As such, here" she waved her wand, and a large stack of papers rose of her desk, splitting into smaller groups and flying to the students, "is your reading for the week. I want an essay as well, detailing how what you have learned could interact with potion making. Let's say, 12 inches? Have a lovely week"

' _Lovely week'_ Harry thought, snorting to himself as he made his way back to his room. ' _Yeah, right. Meeting with Dumbledore coming up. Should be loads of fun'_

At least he and Draco had their lessons with Snape.

And at least he had Pansy.

He smiled, thinking of how close he was getting. She finally had allowed him to see her fully nude.

It had been awesome.

He'd been so close to just grabbing her, though. Or cursing her into doing whatever he wanted.

' _Thank god for Occlumency. Snape's a fucking genius'_

He hadn't grabbed her. He hadn't forced anything on her. Not even for her to just bend down and-

He cleared his mind. He couldn't think about what he wanted from her. It drove him mad.

She had flinched back when he leaned in close to-

He cleared his mind.

His lessons were going well, of course. It wasn't so easy to concentrate on transfiguration or charms, but he thought he knew why.

He kept seeing what he had done. What he had done to Gordon.

Kept mentally going over the spells in the book that Lucius had given to him, the spells he was waiting to try.

' _If they come to me so much easier than transfiguration and charms, shouldn't I focus on them?'_

That was a rebellious thought. He had said as much to Snape in their last lesson, and the surly man had been most displeased.

"The Dark Lord does not desire followers incapable of simple spells"

Harry snorted. "Seriously? What use could my changing a guinea pig into a guinea fowl be?"

Snape stood absolutely still for a moment.

"Attempt to stun me" he ordered.

"What?"

"You heard me, Potter. Attempt to stun me"

"Stupefy!"

Snape barely even flicked his wrist, and the room's large wooden desk flew into the spell's path. When the red jet hit it, it cracked down the middle.

Snape flicked his wrist again, and the desk flew apart into a thousand splinters, which then blasted at Harry.

"Protego!" Harry managed to get the shield up just before the shards of wood collided with him. They hit the shield, throwing up streams of blue light and flying back.

Snape flicked his wrist again.

Where the splinters had been, now hovered dozens of birds. Their cruel eyes glinted at Harry as they dove towards him, talons outstretched.

As the first one scratched his cheek, they all vanished.

"That, Harry, was battle transfiguration. I was only able to accomplish any of that through having worked at the basics first. Do not limit yourself to nothing but the Dark Arts"

Harry looked at Snape in awe. Across the room, Draco mirrored his expression.

Snape had been pleased that Harry was using his Occlumency whenever 'dangerous' thoughts or desires crept in.

He had been less pleased with Harry's inability to sense him in his head in a shorter time than before.

"You need to simply keep practicing. That is all I can say. And we will keep practicing as well"

Harry had grimaced at that. Having Snape in his head always left him feeling- uncomfortable in a really hard to define way. Like there was water in his ear.

Their Patronus casting was improving, as well. It was still formless, but the mist was larger and stayed longer. Most importantly, perhaps, it made Harry feel good.

Not in the same way the Unforgiveables did, but still.

Casting the Unforgiveables was something like having a full body orgasm. Casting the Patronus was like drinking delicious hot chocolate on a freezing day. Something really good, but in a totally different (and smaller) way.

Lost in his recollections, Harry barely noticed when he arrived at his common room.

"Felix Felicis, " he told the wall, and it swung open for him.

The common room was mostly empty, a few groups sitting around the room talking.

One of those was Flint and Avery.

Harry walked towards them.

Snape has agreed with him and Draco, that those two would be appropriate for recruitment. Still, it never hurt to emphasize.

"Hey guys"

"Potter," Avery said, nodding. Flint merely grunted.

"Interesting thing we learned in Magical Theory tonight. Muggles barely have a soul! Crazy no?"

Avery gave him a calculating look. Flint snorted, and said, "what, you surprised?"

"Not really. I mean, growing up with them it's pretty obvious they're barely human. Just cool to know the reason for it"

Flint laughed harshly. "Who cares about the reason?"

"Just found it interesting. G'night, guys"

Harry headed to bed, ignoring Avery's stare. ' _He's smart. He knows something is up. I wonder if his family told him anything?'_

Arithmancy and Runes were going well. Even though they were still focusing on the basics in both classes, they were interesting.

* * *

In Arithmancy they had moved onto Geometry and Trigonometry. Vector had promised that after Easter they would begin studying the magical properties associated with specific numbers.

In Runes, they were still studying the languages themselves, as opposed to anything they could be used for. But Babbling did feel the class had a good enough grasp to start working on translating sentences, so they weren't exactly stagnating.

All in all, even excluding Quidditch practice and time with friends, Harry had a pretty full schedule.

So he really wasn't looking forward to lessons with Dumbledore, exciting as the idea may once have been.

* * *

"Harry, right on time. I trust your return to Hogwarts has been smooth?"

Harry calmed himself. _'There's no way he could know. If he did, he'd have attacked already. He doesn't know'_

"It's been ok. Always a bit tough to get back into it after a break, but it's ok"

"Excellent. I'm glad to hear it" Dumbledore said, over his Phoenix's soft chirping. "Now, Harry. I thought, perhaps if you're interested, I could give you some lessons? Perhaps once a week? On whatever you're particularly interested in. My forte, of course, lies in theory and in Transfiguration, but I dare say I would be able to teach you something in any area you desired" he gave a small chuckle.

' _What about the Dark Arts? Or Blood Magic? You know anything about those, old man?'_

Hesitantly, Harry said. "It sounds wonderful, sir. Really. But, why me? I mean, do you offer everyone this?"

Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, still smiling slightly.

"You are correct. I don't offer this to everyone. But I thought, well. In placing you with muggles for your protection, I robbed you of many years of knowledge of magic. I'd like to repay some of that knowledge"

Harry almost screamed. _'FOR MY PROTECTION! YOU STILL REFUSE TO LET GO OF THAT! FUCK YOU'_

His wand twitched.

He cleared his mind.

"And, more than that. You are achieving excellent grades, which is lovely to see. But you have a quality teachers prize above all else. You thirst for knowledge. You want to learn. I became a teacher because of students like you, Harry. It has been far too long since I have last given a lesson. What do you think?"

It wasn't a choice, not really. The Dark Lord has already told him to accept the offer. And besides, even if he absolutely detested Dumbledore, which he still wasn't sure he did, he would never be able to turn down the chance to learn from as proficient a wizard as Dumbledore.

"I'd love to," he said, with a fake smile plastered on his face. "When can we start?"

Dumbledore smiled back, absentmindedly pulling at his beard.

"We could begin from next week. Let's agree to once a week, at night? Sometime when it won't interfere with any classes or quidditch practices?"

"Monday or Tuesday night would work for me, sir"

"Let's say Monday nights then, at eight. Tuesdays I meet with some members of the Wizengamot"

' _Good to know'_

"As much I would like to, I can not commit to being available every week. Too many responsibilities rest in these tired, old shoulders. But I will inform you each Monday if we will or will not be meeting"

"Ok"

"Anything, in particular, you'd like to study? Or more like bits and pieces of everything?"

"Everything, sir"

Dumbledore chuckled.

"Ah, the enthusiasm of youth. Very well. Perhaps put together a list of what you would like to discuss and learn, and together, we will endeavor to get through it all?"

"Sounds great"

"Lovely. Till next week. Have a wonderful evening, Harry"

Albus Dumbledore watched the door close behind young Harry with a smile. Perhaps he would finally get the chance to heal some of the rifts he had caused.

It could not happen too soon. If, as he suspected, Tom was gaining power again, Harry would be needed.

More importantly, Harry needed to understand that he was cared for. Even if Tom never returned, Harry would still deserve the chance for a normal life. For a happy life.

Albus Dumbledore smiled contentedly. ' _Perhaps I can make some measure of amends for my mistakes'_

* * *

"So. What did he say?"

"What Snape said he would. He'll teach me if I want, once a week if he doesn't have a sudden meeting or something"

"And?"

Harry gave Draco a scornful look. "Of course I'm gonna do it. He said He wants me to"

"Just, be careful, Harry. You heard Snape, Dumbledore's a Legilemens. Even if he's too kind to use it, you never know"

"I know, I know. I'm not looking him in the eyes for more than a second or two, and I'm watching for intrusions the whole time. Don't worry"

Draco hissed back. "Don't worry? I don't want to see Him angry at you. I've heard enough stories to know that"

"You think I want that? I won't give Him any reason to be angry"

"You better not"

"Fuck's sake, Draco. Leave it, ok? Besides, if we're right about Flint and Avery, He'll be happy with us"

"Yeah" Draco looked into the fire for a bit. "I think Jugson might be a good choice also"

"Jugson?"

"Preston Jugson? The seventh year? He just gives me that feeling, you know what I mean?"

Harry thought of the vibe many of the Death Eaters he had met had given off. A feeling of coiled menace, like a snake waiting to strike.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Which one is he?"

Draco looked around the common room. "He's not here now. He's a heavyset guy, big shoulders. Brownish hair. Hangs around with Jason Fawley, that Hufflepuff dude, a lot. I think they're cousins or something"

"You should tell Snape. Let him take care of the next bit"

"Yeah. You think he's already started with Flint and Avery?"

Harry thought for a few minutes, trying to picture how they had been acting the last few days.

"Maybe. They've been a bit more intense, lately"

"Yeah. But the same could be said for us"

"True. At least we're already in"

"Yup"

From across the common room, Theo watched the animated and quiet conversation going on. His eyes narrowed as he thought.

 **AS ALWAYS: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW**


	15. Chapter 11

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 11

As the days moved forward towards Easter, Quidditch practice started being more frequent. Their game with Hufflepuff was coming up.

It freaked Harry out, a bit.

' _What if the Dementors come again? Everyone will see me as weak'_

So Harry became more and more insistent about learning to cast the full Patronus.

It seemed to annoy Snape.

"I have told you countless times. What you are currently casting would be enough to hold Dementors off for enough time that someone else will step in. I have told you that Dumbledore has expressly forbidden the Dementors from coming to another Quidditch game. Stop letting your fear control you"

Harry tried to explain. "I don't want to just get away from them. I want to make them get away from me"

"Control your arrogance"

"I'm not arrogant-"

"Then why are you acting as if you are? Your Patronus is not perfect, true. But it is functional. Your Occlumency is not. Your dueling skills are not. Focus on that which needs greater help first, and push your ego aside"

"My dueling skills-"

"Are excellent for one of your age. But you would not be coming up against your contemporaries in a true battle, would you?"

"No, but-"

"And surely you would want to totally crush your enemies? Or does your desire for victory only extend to amortal, alien creatures?"

"Of course, but-"

"Then continue to train your mind and your fighting abilities"

* * *

The lessons with Dumbledore were...interesting.

Harry couldn't quite decide what he felt about the man. He detested him, and they were on opposite sides. He respected him, and the Headmaster clearly had good intentions. And his lessons were intriguing. They always ended up going for longer than the planned hour, the two of them caught up in some discussion and not noticing the time.

And Dumbledore was willing to flit from topic to topic as Harry asked.

From the crafting of magical objects, which Dumbledore used the Pensieve to demonstrate, to Transfiguration, to the discussion of Magical Theory. Dumbledore was game for all of it. And seemed to take great pleasure in all of it.

Of course, it would be a long time before Harry would be able to put most of what he was learning into practice. He simply didn't know enough Arithmancy or Runes to even think of making a magical object, and he would need to get better at Transfiguration before he could come anywhere near the instantaneous changes Dumbledore and Snape had both demonstrated.

Still, it was cool to see the eventual outcomes of his studies. If he kept working at them, at least.

* * *

"Are you prepared?"

"Yes sir"

"Keep your concentration steady. I will be standing by"

Harry focused on the rat in front of him. This was part of his deal with Snape. Snape would help him practice one spell he wanted a week, usually something from Lucius' book.

In return, Harry would work as hard as he had been in previous years in his normal subjects.

"Kamtzi deraavan"

It took a few seconds for it to begin. Then, a black mist formed in front of Harry. After a little bit of intense thought, Harry managed to make it coalesce.

There were dozens, if not hundreds of ants where the mist had been.

They were larger than normal ants, their mandibles clicking.

Harry flicked his wand towards the rat.

The ants marched forward. They tore into the rat, ripping it apart. Bit by bit, fur flew, the skin was shredded, organs appeared. Within five minutes, the rat was nothing more than a gleaming skeleton.

Their work done; the ants vanished.

Harry straightened, sweating.

"You seem to have talent with the Dark Arts," Snape said quietly. "More so than in other fields of magic"

Harry nodded.

"Keep in mind, Harry. Useful as they may be, the Dark Arts are not suitable for every occasion"

Harry nodded again.

"Now. Let us see how long it take you to notice my intrusion. As usual, I will not tell you when I am actually entering your mind"

After a few minutes, Harry called out.

"You are improving. If you continue to do so, after your next break we will begin with fighting off an enemy who is attempting to steal your secrets"

Harry gulped. Draco had already begun on that. It didn't look fun, to say the least.

"How long were you in there for?"

"Four minutes"

"A lot better than the ten I started with"

"I said you were improving, did I not?"

"Yeah, but-"

"Are you a puling child who requires compliments for every achievement?"

"No, b-"

"So act like it. Let me see your Patronus"

' _Pansy's lips, soft on his. The feeling of power coursing through him as he ran his hands over her body. The knowledge that she was his. The knowledge that he was accepted, respected'_

Harry raised his wand. "Expecto Patronum!"

The silvery mist shot out of his wand, hovering in the center of the room. It seemed to shrink in on itself, becoming smaller, and yet, brighter. It stayed like that for a few minutes, before dissipating.

Sweat dripping from his forehead, Harry lowered his wand.

"Better. It is not impossible that you will achieve a corporeal Patronus by the end of the school year"

"You really think so?"

Snape sneered at him. "Am I in the habit of offering false hope? I believe it is possible. Draco, let me see yours"

After a bit of deep thought, Draco cast it himself.

His mist was much larger than Harry's had been, but it didn't grow brighter. He held it for a few minutes before it too vanished.

"Good enough. We will continue next week"

As Harry and Draco were leaving the room, Snape called out, "do win the game. If you lose to Hufflepuff I will be...unimpressed"

* * *

No Dementors came to interrupt the game.

It was a good game, not too hectic. Harry didn't have too much to do. He scored twice, helped set up another few goals, but otherwise he basically just flew around, listening to the commentary.

' _Jordan isn't so bad when Gryffindor isn't playing. Why can't they just get someone else?'_

Harry spotted the Snitch first. He spent a few minutes trying to figure out how to let Draco know about it without alerting Diggory. As he was flying towards him, Draco flew into a swift dive, with Diggory following a few moments later.

Of course, in a battle of speed, the one with the head start and the faster broom was going to win.

" **AND THAT'S MALFOY WITH THE SNITCH. SLYTHERIN WINS"**

Jordan's groan was almost as loud as his shouting.

" **260-130. SOMEONE SERIOUSLY NEEDS TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THOSE BROOMS"**

' _As if it's all up to the brooms. Talent goes into it as well'_

The party in the common room that night was particularly raucous. After all, if Ravenclaw beat Gryffindor in the next game, all they would have to do is beat Ravenclaw, and once again, the cup would be theirs.

And the way Gryffindor had been playing, it seemed more than likely.

* * *

In mid-February, the Lions and Eagles faced off.

The whole Slytherin team went to watch, sitting together, and making notes of the Ravenclaw strategies.

Hoping and praying that Ravenclaw would win.

Of course, even if Gryffindor won, they still would probably win the cup. Just, at that point, point differentials would come into play.

And since they hadn't beaten the Hufflepuff by that much, it would still give the Badgers a chance.

As amazing as quidditch was, Harry still found it quite boring to watch. Seeing other people play wasn't nearly as breathtaking as flying himself, having the wind blowing through his hair and robes.

Especially the game that was currently going on.

The teams were very evenly matched. Barely keeping possession of the Quaffle for long enough to score.

By the time an hour had passed, the scoreboard read 50-40 to Gryffindor.

The boredom was palpable. There had barely even been any sight of the snitch.

Bole and Derrick were playing exploding snap, ignoring Flint's growls to pay attention.

As their deck exploded, Chang went into a dive, Thomas on her tail.

"Come on, Chang!"

"Where's it?"

"There! Hovering by the stands, just above the ground!"

A glint of gold and the Snitch flew off, rising as it did. But Chang and Thomas were gaining, straightening out of their dives. Chang was still ahead, but not by much.

She dove again, Thomas following.

She pulled up quicker then he could and carried on rising, chasing after the Snitch.

In the previous seconds that it took Thomas to recover from the feint, he had fallen behind. Far enough to allow Chang to-

The Ravenclaw stand exploded in cheers.

With a dejected tone, Jordan called out. " **RAVENCLAW WINS. 190-50"**

"And, gentleman, we go through to the finals," Flint said, grim triumph filling his voice.

* * *

In the middle of the night, they were woken up by Snape. Apparently, Black had broken into the castle again.

Once again they moved to the great hall and slept there.

Once again, the castle was searched.

Once again, Black wasn't found.

The next morning, of course, the rumors were flying. One story that seemed to be true, though, was that Black had actually entered the Gryffindor dorms.

He had been standing over Weasley, brandishing a knife. Weasley yelled, and Black ran.

"Trust the Gryffindors to have dorms that can be broken into by a madman with a knife. You wouldn't find anyone infiltrating our rooms"

Draco said, smugly.

"Harry, are you sure you're not worried? Apparently, Black was shouting at Weasley. Asking him 'where is he?' He must have been talking about you"

"Fuck! Theo, I'm not worried about him, ok?!"

' _Unless the Dark Lord was lying to me. And if he was, I probably have bigger problems than Black'_

"You say that, but-"

"Leave it, mate" Draco muttered.

"Yeah. Harry knows what to be afraid of" Pansy added snuggling against him.

"Fine, fine" Theo raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. "Merlin, you try to show some concern, and this is what you get"

* * *

"So, Harry. How has your week been?"

Harry settled in the chair before Dumbledore.

"Interesting, sir. Did you find any information about Black?"

The smile left Dumbledore's eyes as he sighed.

"Unfortunately not. How he entered and exited remains a mystery"

"Sir?"

"Yes, Harry?"

"He-he was friends with my parents right? For years, before he betrayed them. Did he ever do anything to make him seem suspect?"

Dumbledore looked at Harry sharply.

"Why do you ask?"

"It's just" _'be careful now, very very careful'_ , "I've heard about what good friends they were, and how my parents trusted him with their location. How did he pull that off for so long, without giving it away?"

Dumbledore gave another sigh.

"I would never have believed him capable of it. Your father and Sirius were close friends, from the day they arrived at Hogwarts. You know the Weasley Twins?"

"Of course"

"Then you can understand how close your father and Sirius Black were. You never saw one without the other. Always pulling some jape. And their friendship only grew. When Sirius ran away from home, he moved in with your father and his parents"

"He ran away from home?"

"Sirius had a ... difficult family. They were very proud blood purists. Many members of his extended family joined the Death Eaters. Your grandparents were quite the opposite"

Dumbledore sighed, again.

"You know Sirius was your father's best man and your godfather. But I saw them fighting together many times, in the war. They risked their lives for each other. I once personally saw Sirius dive in front of a Killing Curse that had been aimed at your father's back"

"How did he survive that?"

Dumbledore chuckled absolutely humorlessly and simply answered.

"I was there"

After a short pause, he continued. "I admit, I've often regretted saving his life. But one cannot overthink their past actions. Only madness lies that way"

' _I'm sure you think that a lot. About what you put me through'_

"When I cast the Fidelius, there was never any doubt about who your father would choose. I offered to be the Secret Keeper, but more due to my worries that your parents' friends would be made into targets"

"Why weren't they their own Secret Keepers?"

"Every charm, every spell has a weakness. The Fidelius' only weakness is that it relies on trust. The secret has to be given over to someone else to guard. Your parents could have been their own Secret Keepers, but that would have weakened the spell. A Fidelius, cast correctly, is unbreakable. And I cast the Fidelius for your parents"

Harry simply nodded.

"When your parents were attacked, it didn't even occur to me that Sirius could have betrayed them. It seemed impossible. I found it more likely that Voldemort"

Harry flinched

"Had somehow found a way to break it, even though I knew that to be as impossible. It was only later, after the altercation with Peter, that I realized how deep the betrayal had been"

Harry was shocked to see how deep the pain was in Dumbledore's eyes. Agony.

"Harry. Don't let this teach you not to trust. We don't know what Voldemort"

Harry flinched, again. Dumbledore frowned slightly but carried on talking.

"Did to pull Sirius to his side. Trust, and love, and hope. These are our greatest assets"

Harry nodded, not willing to speak.

"I believe we should leave it here. As usual, we are over our time period. I'll see you next week, for our last meeting before the Easter break"

Harry nodded, standing.

"And Harry. Fear of the name only increases fear of the thing itself. Voldemort does not deserve our fear"

' _You really believe that, don't you?'_

As Dumbledore had promised, they met the following week.

Harry had been trying to research the Fidelius charm but had found nothing.

Even a cursory search of the Restricted Section didn't help. Maybe if he would have been able to go through it more slowly, but still.

He told Dumbledore that, and the man simply chuckled.

"I'm not surprised you searched. Nor am I surprised that you found nothing. The Fidelius borders on forbidden magic"

Surprised, Harry asked "what kind?"

"Soul Magic. The secret is entrusted to the soul of the Secret Keeper"

"I just wouldn't expect the Chief Warlock to be-to use banned magic"

"As I said, it's not quite banned. More bordering the ban. Regardless, I wouldn't simply allow people to stay in danger when I could protect them"

' _Maybe we're not really so different'_

"It's just- I've been told that some magic is banned because it's so dangerous, so how-"

"How can I justify using it? It's simple, really. I know which magic twists the user, and which doesn't"

"Shouldn't magic be judged based on the results? Not on what is arbitrarily decided?"

For a second, Harry thought he had gone too far. Then Dumbledore smiled again.

"I detest the fact that it is necessary to ban the use of any magic. But I will not argue that it is necessary. Some magic is simply too dangerous for people to be trusted to use it correctly"

' _Hypocrite'_

"But you just said that not all the banned magic is so bad?"

"This is an old argument, but one that should still be debated. Most of Soul Magic, for example, is benign or even beneficial. But there is some that is so horrendously terrible, that it cannot be allowed into public knowledge. With enough knowledge of the benign parts, however, one could gain the understanding needed to perform the evil, for lack of a better word, type"

"So Soul Magic is simply off limits, cause it can be misused?"

"Not entirely off limits. Someone pursuing a Mastery in Magical Theory could learn it. Most healers have at least a basic foundation in it"

Dumbledore frowned, staring at Harry.

"Tell me, Harry. Why does it bother you so much? Do you wish to learn any of these types of magic?"

"N-not now. I want to learn all magic, someday"

"An admirable goal," said Dumbledore, nodding. "So why does it affect you now?"

"It's just. Magic is so amazing. So-so-"

"Wondrous?"

"Yeah. And the thought of someone just deciding that some of it is bad. It-it doesn't sit well"

"I understand. I commiserate, in fact. But consider this. If there were stricter laws in place earlier, perhaps Voldemort would not have gained the power he did?"

"Maybe..."

"Grindelwald wouldn't have, I know that for a fact"

"But neither of them really cared about the law in the first place!"

"Good point. But our goal isn't to prevent all crime, all terror. That would be marvelous but is unfortunately simply impossible. Our goal is to make it more difficult for them"

"Wouldn't this also make it harder to fight them?"

"Another good point. And it is also the reason that Aurors receive training in identifying and fighting against these types of magic"

There wasn't really much Harry could say to that, other than a muttered "Yeah, but still"

The conversation with Dumbledore went on much longer than their meetings usually did. Harry walked back to his common room through the quiet and empty castle, deep in thought.

' _He's still wrong. No laws could have prevented the Dark Lord from doing whatever he wanted, from learning whatever he wanted. It's not fair to just decide some stuff is evil'_

He walked in to find the common room empty.

Almost empty.

One chair, the one right next to the fire was occupied. Theo sat in it, a brooding look on his face as he raised a cup to his lips.

' _Is that firewhiskey?'_

"Theo? Are you ok?"

Theo didn't even turn his head.

"Why wouldn't I be?" The exuberance that usually filled his voice was gone. He sounded dead.

"Um. You're drinking. On your own. I don't think that's very healthy"

"It shuts my thoughts up. That's all that matters"

' _What happened? Is his dad all right?'_

"Theo, mate. What's wrong?"

"You really want to know?"

"Of course! Theo, I-" Harry slid into the chair next to Theo's as he spoke. Theo still hadn't looked at him.

"Put up a privacy charm and I'll tell you"

Harry did, using the one Snape had shown him.

"Done," he said.

Theo turned his head. There was something heavy and unreadable in his dark eyes.

"The Dark Lord's back and you and Draco joined Him. That's what's wrong"

Someone had replaced Harry's blood with ice.

' _Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck'_

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Harry managed, trying to keep his voice normal.

"You heard me. You and Draco joined Him. I know"

"Theo, I-"

"Come off it, Harry. I know people think I'm stupid. I do stupid things" he glanced at the firewhiskey in his hand, "and I say stupid stuff, but I'm not an idiot. I notice things"

"What do you think you noticed?"

In his head, the litany continued.

' _Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. He knows. I'm gonna have to-'_

"How's this. Christmas time, last year, right. Draco's parents were just too busy for him to go home. Well, so were Pansy's, Crabbe and Goyle's, my dad, and Selwyn's"

Selwyn. Harry had met a Selwyn. At his initiation.

"So? Just because-"

"They all were Death Eaters" Theo's mouth twisted in a sardonic grin. "Sorry. They all were imperiused or framed"

"Mate, I really-"

"Ok. Then comes summer break. We barely see you and Draco. I know my dad's been meeting his old friends, but so what, right? Then we come back to school. And you guys are different. More intense. Like something happened to make you all mature or something"

"Theo, you're seeing stuff where-"

Theo talked as if Harry hadn't even tried.

"Meanwhile, I know my dad is meeting with all his old friends a lot. He starts talking about things like honor, and glory. The only time he would talk about those type of stuff was when he was talking about the Dark Lord's goals. Now he's talking about them again"

Harry didn't try to speak. His wand felt hot in his hand.

' _I can't do it. I can't. He's my friend'_

"Then winter break. My dad goes to a meeting one night with Lucius. After that, he's telling me how far you and Draco are gonna go in life, how I should stick with you guys, try to be more like you. And when you come back, you're even more intense. Spending a lot of time whispering to each other"

' _I can't do it. But I have to. He knows'_

"And you're just so unconcerned about Black. Like someone told you not to worry. But who would be able to convince you that Black's not a danger to you?"

"Theo, come on, mate. You're seeing stuff that isn't there"

"Am I? And then I get a letter from my dad, today. He wants me to meet someone over Easter break. He says it's time I do my part to restore our family name to its former glory. So am I really overthinking everything? My dad isn't going to take me to meet the Dark Lord?"

"Would that be so bad?" Harry whispered.

"Merlin, Harry. I'm thirteen fucking years old. I'm a kid-"

"So was I"

Theo nodded. "I don't want to fight in a war. It doesn't do any good"

"What do you mean? Of course it-"

"Bullshit. All that talk is bullshit. It just leaves everyone pissed, and just makes a cycle of death"

"No, it-"

"Did I ever tell you how my mum died? The real story"

' _What?'_

"You said she was sick, and-"

"That's the cover. My dad worked it out with Lucius and Avery. She was murdered. Revenge"

Theo sipped deeply, coughing afterward.

"In the war, my dad killed this woman. Some mudblood who had been making waves. Took her husband a long time to find out who had done it. I was eight"

Harry listened, spellbound.

"Dad was sick, dragon pox. This man breaks into our house. He killed my mother. Almost killed me, too. Dad hobbled out of bed, he heard the shouting. Fought the guy. Barely survived, he was so sick. But he drove him off. He ran. And it was just me, dad, and my mum's body"

"Shit, Theo, that-"

"My dad got some people in, his old friends. Made it look like she had been sick. Like she caught dragon pox from him. But her brother, my uncle. He went after the guy. Managed to kill him. But that man had a son. Killed my uncle"

' _Fuck'_

"When dad was better, he went after him. Killed him. Killed every member of that family, too. Cousins, aunts, uncles. Wiped them out. It didn't help. He was still left with the memories of the woman he loved, and the son he wished had died in her place"

He drank, deeply.

"My dad killed that guy's wife. He killed my dad's wife. My uncle killed him. His son killed my uncle. My dad killed his son. The cycle doesn't end, Harry. It just doesn't fucking end. I don't want to keep it going forever"

"Your dad ended it, though," Harry said softly.

"What?"

"He ended it. He killed anyone who stood against him. That's how you end the cycle. Leave no-one standing to fight you"

"I don't fucking want to kill" Theo almost screamed.

"You don't have a choice" Harry hissed. "You really think you can just sit it out? What are your options? Be a traitor to one side, have the other side never trust you. After all, you're a Slytherin, your father's a death eater. Dumbledore wouldn't help you"

"I just don't want to be in a war"

"I didn't want to be in an orphanage. You don't get what you want"

"Harry-"

"Listen, Theo. I'm not gonna do anything, but you need to make your choice. You can't just sit in the middle. Pick a side"

Harry left, canceling the muffliato.

It was a long time before Theo came to bed.

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	16. Chapter 12

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

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Chapter 12

Before disembarking the train, Harry made plans to visit Pansy over the break.

"Got to give you your birthday present, don't I?"

Pansy blushed as Blaise chimed in. "Of course. You give it to her, Harry"

Theo barely even looked up. He'd been far quieter than usual, ever since his conversation with Harry.

As everyone was getting off, though, he caught Harry's eye and nodded.

' _Good. He made his choic_ e. _That reminds me'_

He rushed ahead, dragging his trunk until he caught up with Flint and Avery.

"See you over the break, guys"

"What?" Flint grunted. Avery stared, eyes widening.

Harry just winked at them and rushed off to find the Malfoys.

As always, Pansy hosted a party to celebrate her birthday.

She looked amazing, decked in a long flowing gown that shifted colors and clung to her figure, accentuating it.

She was wearing the necklace Harry had gotten her, fire drops glinting against her pale skin.

' _Still, she'd look better wearing nothing'_

He danced with her before heading to the buffet and asked her.

"You liked the gift?"

"Of course I did. I'm wearing it, aren't I?"

"Good. I've got another one to give you, in private"

She gave him a look. "Harry, I don't know-"

"Shh," he pressed his finger to her lips. "I promise, you'll enjoy it"

"Yeah, but-"

"Come on. It's for you"

She kissed him on the cheek before leaving the dance floor.

He noticed her father watching from the side. He nodded at Harry, respectfully. Harry's smirk grew wider.

* * *

"God! Harry, that's-thats-"

He raised his head, her fine hair brushing against his chin.

"Told you you'd like it"

She moaned and squirmed under his tongue as he bent back to his task, lapping and rubbing her.

When her legs shuddered, squeezing his head, he finally stopped, jaw aching.

"How did you learn to do that?"

Harry shrugged, dislodging her arm from around him.

"Dunno. Although you hear a lot of tips in the locker room" he said with a leer.

"Gross. I don't want to be thinking about Flint, next time"

"Oh, so you want there to be a next time?"

Pansy blushed.

' _Amazing. I'm sitting here with a hand on her tit, having just eaten her for like ten minutes, and she blushes'_

"It was really good" she admitted.

"I give the best presents, don't I?"

"My presents aren't that bad," she said with mock indignation.

And she wrapped her hand around him.

He held back a groan, barely.

"Not bad, just not new"

She looked at him, naked uncertainty written clear across her face.

He wanted to scream.

' _You know what I want! Do I have to fucking spell it out for you?!'_

She turned around, bending in front of him. He seized a fistful of her hair as her head bobbed.

He pulled her forward, making her take it all in.

It was as good as he had ever imagined it to be.

When he was finished, she lay back beside him on the bed.

"I love you," he said, kissing her forehead.

"You too," she said, in a small voice.

* * *

Harry and Draco watched as Flint and Avery were initiated. It was a far smaller crowd than their own had been, the Malfoys, Theo's dad, Avery's family, Flint's uncle, and Snape. And a few randoms, of course, but not that many important people.

The muggles hadn't been chosen for any specific reason, either. There were no questions about their names, or jobs, or beliefs.

Just a Crucio, and then an Avada Kedavra.

And then they swore the oaths, and Flint and Avery were in.

After speaking to his uncle, Flint swaggered over to Harry.

"You knew?"

Harry laughed.

"Who do you think suggested you to our dear Head of House?"

Flabbergasted, Flint spluttered "h-how long?"

"How long have I been in?"

Flint nodded.

"Christmas was mine and Draco's initiation. We met the Dark Lord at the beginning of the summer, though"

Eyes wider than Harry would have thought possible, Flint gestures up to the stage.

"So you guys did that?"

Harry laughed, again. "Ours was a bit different. Ask your uncle, he was there"

"He was?"

"No joke"

"Wow"

"Yup"

Flint clapped Harry on the back. "Don't think I'm gonna go any easier on you in practice because of this"

"Wouldn't dream of it"

* * *

Harry and Draco waited for a shaken Theo to make his way to one of their rooms after meeting the Dark Lord.

They weren't surprised by his ashen appearance. Meeting the Dark Lord was an intimidating experience.

He stumbled in, sitting down roughly on Harry's bed.

"Holy shit" he muttered.

"What did you say?" Draco demanded.

' _If he hadn't agreed to serve Him, the Dark Lord wouldn't have let him leave. Not in one piece'_

"What do you think I said? I said yes, I'd be overjoyed to join"

"Good," Draco said fervently.

"Theo," Harry said slowly. "What did He say about when you would do it?"

Theo looked up sharply. "Do what?"

"Your initiation"

"He said over the summer I would be formally welcomed. He said you guys, my dad, and Snape would help me prepare"

Harry and Draco shared a glance.

"What?"

"Theo" Harry spoke gently, "the initiation can be a bit..."

"Rough" Draco said, looking greenish.

"Yeah"

"Why? What do I need to do?"

"Kill a muggle"

Theo laughed, a sound like glass breaking. When he didn't stop, Draco called him. He still didn't stop, and Harry slapped him.

"Fuck!"

"You have to do it. And you have to Crucio them first"

Theo just looked at him.

"It's hard, sure. But you can do it. Just keep telling yourself, it's them or you"

Theo didn't take his eyes of Draco as he spoke.

"That's what you tell yourself?"

Harry chimed in. "You do whatever you need to do to stop the thoughts"

"True, true"

The room was silent for a few minutes, the three boys lost in thought.

Theo burst out. "I'm just a kid!"

Harry looked at him with pity. "Not anymore"

* * *

The Dark Lord decided that Harry and Draco needed some extra dueling training.

He also decided to be the one to train them, himself.

Of course, he was so far beyond their level that it was unthinkable for him to duel against them. Instead, he had them face off against each other and would correct them and give pointers afterward. He was a harsh taskmaster, far more intense than Snape on his worst day, but under his tutelage, they grew.

By the end of the week, they had gained as much from his training as they had from Snape over the entire course of the year. And far more than they had managed to teach themselves in the previous two years. Their speed still needed to be improved, but he assured them that would come with time. In terms of their strategies and abilities though, they would probably be able to face off against anyone in school. Assuming they were prepared, of course.

"I see a bright future for both of you," he told them, making them all but preen, "you will acquit yourselves well in battle"

"Thank you, My Lord," they said, bowing their heads.

"Harry. Tomorrow I will be meeting with you and Severus. You will be informing me of everything you have gleaned from Dumbledore. Draco, do you think you have anything to add to that discussion?"

"No, My Lord"

"I approve of your honesty. Very well. Harry, be here at 2 p.m. tomorrow"

"I will"

"Good. Dismissed, both of you"

* * *

They met and went through everything Dumbledore had told Harry. Of course, the Dark Lord scoffed at many of Dumbledore's theories. But he was interested in some of the little tidbits Dumbledore had let slip.

"So he meets with the Wizengamot on Tuesdays. Do you know what time?"

That was where Snape came in. Snape was able to fill in many of the gaps in Harry's information.

"He generally begins his meeting at 6 p.m."

Harry was busy telling about how Dumbledore said he wanted to start giving a class again when a loud commotion broke through their discussion.

Snape was just heading towards the door when it burst open.

A savage looking, animalistic man with wild grey hair strode in, pulling a small, scruffy wizard by his collar.

"We caught this one eavesdropping on us milord"

The Dark Lord rose. "Who were you with, and where were you?"

"Was with Romulus Redtooth, at the White Wyvern, milord. Thought I'd bring him here to find out what he knows before-"

The Dark Lord walked forward, waving his wand at the wizard as he fell.

The wizard raised one hand, and the Dark Lord stomped it to the ground roughly before gripping his chin.

"That's Mundungus Fletcher, My Lord. He works for Dumbledore"

"Thank you, Severus"

The Dark Lord raised Mundungus' face and stared into his eyes.

After several minutes, he dropped Mundungus' head and spun on the other man.

It took all of Harry's self-control not to cover his ears at what followed.

"THAT IS WHAT YOU CALL DISCRETE?" The Dark Lord shrieked And waves his wand.

The wizard who had brought Mundungus in flew backward, into the wall. He slid up the wall until he was a foot off the ground.

"Please, milord-"

"I GAVE YOU ONE ORDER! YOU WERE TO MEET WITH THE OTHER CLAN LEADERS, AND GOVE YOUR REPORTS DISCRETELY! AND WHAT DID YOU DO? WHAT DID YOU DO, FENRIR?"

' _Fenrir Greyback. I thought he looked familiar'_

"I-I- I did that!"

The Dark Lord snarled. A gleaming dagger appeared and blasted itself, lodging into Fenrir's arm. His screams filled the room.

' _Silver, it must be. Holy shit'_

"YOU MEET IN THE SAME PLACE, AT THE SAME TIME, EVERY DAY! HES BEEN WATCHING YOU FOR WEEKS!"

Another dagger appeared, flying into Fenrir's other arm.

"HE'S BEEN REPORTING TO DUMBLEDORE! THE ONE THING I DIDNT WANT! AND YOU LET IT HAPPEN!"

"Mercy!" Fenrir cried. A swarm of daggers appeared, turning his arms into pincushions. Blood was pooling on the floor. Harry just watched, in horrified fascination.

"YOU FAIL ME, AND THEN BEG FOR MERCY?"

Every word was accented by a wave of the Dark Lord's wand. Each time, a cut opened up on Fenrir's cheek.

"Tell me, Fenrir" the Dark Lord spoke softly, dangerously, "give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you right now?"

"I-I-I have c-contacts with the werewolves! No-one else-"

"I could find another. And if I did that while wearing your hide as a cloak, they would be sure not to fail me. Give me a reason to let you live"

"I've brought in so many! So many wolves willing to serve"

The Dark Lord spun around again. He pointed at Mundungus.

"Harry. Make him die screaming"

Harry gulped.

"Reddio-"

Something stung his hand, and he dropped his wand.

"Show me something you haven't before. Unless you are not deserving of my favor?"

Harry nodded, picking his wand back up.

' _Don't fuck this up'_

"Kamtzi Deraavan!"

The mist appeared. His mind fractured into a thousand pieces for a few moments, before the ants formed.

He gestured to Mundungus.

The ants marched forward.

At first, Mundungus screamed. He stopped that quickly when some of the ants got into his open mouth.

It wasn't too long before he started again.

Roughly around the same time as they ate through his eyelids and started on his eyeballs, causing a reddish-yellow liquid to leak out.

They are through his tongue, turning his screams into harsh, hooting noises.

He thrashed and squirmed. He moaned as his flesh was ripped away by thousands of sets of tiny, sharp teeth.

And he died.

After what felt like hours, there was nothing left but bones.

The Dark Lord crushed the skull under his heel, grinding it into a fine powder.

"Well done. At least there is still someone capable of obeying orders"

"Thank you, My Lord" Harry said, feeling exhausted. Exhausted, sickened, and —excited.

"Fenrir, I am merciful. I will grant you one more opportunity to not fail me"

Still hanging and impaled on the wall, Fenrir growled out. "Thank you, milord. I won't let you down, I swear, I'll never-"

"See that you don't. If you do, you will beg for Mundungus's fate"

The Dark Lord waved, and Fenrir fell, the daggers vanishing. The wounds on his arms and face closed.

"Leave my sight before I regret my kindness"

Fenrir hurried out, back bent, muttering apologies and thanks.

"Now, Harry, Severus. Where were we?"

* * *

Harry stumbled into Draco's room. He was reading but hurriedly shut the book at the sight of Harry's face.

"Merlin, Harry. What happened?"

"I never want to see the Dark Lord angry at me"

"What happened?"

And Harry told him the whole tale, only leaving out the feeling of pure bliss he had felt when he had ended Mundungus.

And the pride he had felt when the Dark Lord had complimented him afterward.

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	17. Interlude IV

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

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 **ENJOY**

Interlude IV

 _Parkinson Manor_

Pansy lay on her bed, face scrunched up in a frown as she thought.

Sometimes Harry really scared her. The look he would get in his eyes sometimes, it just didn't sit well with her.

It freaked her out, to be perfectly honest.

He was such a great guy, thoughtful and loving. But then she would be hesitant to go further.

And he would get this look.

The same look he had when she found him with that rabbit.

' _Surely he wouldn't even think of doing that to me?'_

But she wasn't so sure. The certainty was slowly abandoning her.

Sometimes he made her feel like all he cared about was her body. And what he could do with it.

And he was rough with her.

She'd thought about putting a boy's thing in her mouth before. Honestly, who hadn't?

But she'd never thought that he would be pulling her hair and pinching her shoulder. That it would be painful.

And she was scared.

She knew it would only be a matter of time until he wanted something she wasn't willing to give.

And then what? How would he react? What would he do?

She didn't know.

And sometimes, when she spoke about Harry, her parents looked at one another.

They never said anything, but there was something in their look.

Something that scared her, too.

And she wanted to speak to her mother about it, but what could she say?

" _So, mummy. Harry wanted me to suck his cock, but I was uncertain. And he gave me this scary look. And he only tells me he loves me after I've made him cum. And he scares me'_

She snorted.

As if that would go down well.

' _Still. Maybe I could talk to her without being too explicit? She'll be able to help me'  
_

Maybe. Or maybe she'd just laugh it off, saying it's how all boys are. Maybe mummy would ignore her.

' _No. She wouldn't do that'_

Eventually, Pansy decided. She would ask her mother for advice and try to explain a few her worries.

Her mother would be sure to solve them.

* * *

 _The Shrieking Shack_

' _The cat will bring me Peter. I just have to believe that. The cat will bring me Peter. I can't risk going into the castle again. The cat will bring me Peter'_

' _What then?'_

Sirius shook his head, marveling at his sanity. Not so long ago, the thought of 'what then' wouldn't even have occurred to him.

It was amazing what being out of Azkaban can do for the mind. Being free of the endless cold and fear and screams and-

' _Maybe I'll write a letter to Dumbledore?'_

He looked around the room. There was a table with nothing on it.

' _Ok, I'll need to get paper first. And a quill, that's important too'_

He longed to go outside for a bit. Just to feel the sun on his skin.

That made it clear to him that it wasn't a dream.

In Azkaban, there was never sun.

Only the cold and the screams and the fear and the-

"Later" he muttered. "I need to think, now"

He almost jumped at the echo, before remembering that he had spoken.

' _What can I tell him?'_

"Tell him you're unarmed. That you've got proof you're innocent. Peter fucking Pettigrew did it"

Before he knew it, he was screaming.

"PETER FUCKING DID IT! HE SOLD THEM OUT! HE KILLED JAMES! HE KILLED JAMES AND LILY! AND HE FRAMED ME! THE FUCKING RAT!"

Eventually, his tirade ended. His breath came down to a regular rhythm. His heart calmed down.

"It was Peter" he whispered. "And I want to turn him in. I want to be set free"

' _I'm already free!'_

' _Am I?'_

He screamed again. Halfway through, he was howling. A large, black dog left the Shrieking Shack.

The sun would prove that he was out of Azkaban.

And maybe he would be able to get writing equipment, as a dog.

* * *

 _Severus Snape's Quarters_

Severus changed directions, moving from a clockwise to counter-clockwise stir.

The potion bubbled, slowly changing from a greenish color to a dark purple, almost black hue.

' _5...6...7'_

He stepped out of reach as it began emitting bright sparks.

With a wave of his wand, the fire below the cauldron was extinguished.

' _Let it cool, then freeze it. Defrost in exactly one weeks time, and reheat'_

It was practically complete. After all the months of slaving over it, with a precision that almost no-one else would have managed, it was finally done.

The perfect poison.

There were many poisons that were so-called untraceable. There was only one that truly was.

Only one poison that would cause a seemingly perfectly natural heart attack, going so far as to cause stress on the heart's muscles for a few days first. Going so far as to clog the arteries. And would then dissolve totally into the bloodstream.

And had no identifying taste or odor whatsoever.

And had no antidote whatsoever. Even a bezoar would be useless in fighting it.

Only one.

And it was sitting before him in an unassuming cauldron.

It boggled his mind sometimes, that there truly was only one perfect poison. Surely with magic, everything should be possible?

But no. There was only one. And it was one of the most difficult, time-consuming potions to brew.

He could still screw it up, simply by defrosting and reheating it a quarter of an hour too late.

And after the months and months of effort, it only gave enough for one dosage.

Even so, it was gratifying to have been successful. Few, even amongst Potion Masters were capable of brewing it.

Of course, they didn't have the Dark Lord forcing them to make it.

At the thought of his master, Severus shuddered. No matter how many times he had seen the Dark Lord express his fury, he was still affected as strongly as the first.

And what he had seen Harry do.

' _I should never have helped him learn that spell. No-one deserves that type of death. No-one'_

But Harry had brought it upon Mundungus Fletcher, prized thief, and idiot.

And Harry had enjoyed it.

Oh, he had felt sickened afterward. No matter how much he tried to hide it, that fact had been clear. But there had been fierce joy in his eyes as Mundungus was eaten alive.

It was horrific. To see Lily's eyes lit up like that.

It was an abomination.

It made Severus wish he could kill himself.

He had thought Occlumency would help the boy control his desires. It hadn't. Not enough, at least.

Of course, Harry was not an expert Occlumency yet. Not even near. Draco was well on the way, but he was clearly gifted in that respect.

Still, it should have helped Harry more.

He had thought that learning the Patronus charm would help Harry.

Harry was almost capable of casting a corporeal Patronus, something many fully trained wizards couldn't do. Yet, it hadn't helped as it should have.

He had even thought, hoped that perhaps Harry's relationship with Parkinson would help him. Would cause him to be more empathetic.

It only seemed to drive his desires more.

Severus was at his wit's end. He simply didn't know how to slow Harry's descent.

' _Before I know it, Lily's eyes will be lit with the same perverse madness as Bella's were'_

Nevertheless, he would find a way. He would not abandon his goals. He could not. To do so would be to deny everything he was.

He would find a way to help Harry, to stop him from becoming yet another sadistic monster in service of the Dark Lord.

* * *

 _Headmaster's Office, Hogwarts_

Something niggled at him. His instincts had led him wrong before, but not often. They were warning him of something.

' _Mundungus, perhaps?'_

He hadn't heard from Mundungus for a few days, true. But that was how Mundungus operated, disappearing for up to weeks at a time.

Albus' mind turned to thoughts of the meetings Mundungus had been spying on for him.

' _Tom wouldn't reveal himself to his followers unless he had regained a body. But surely there would be some sign if he had been successful in that endeavor?'_

' _Wouldn't there be?'_

Albus frowned. Patience had never been one of Tom's virtues.

Intelligence, however, had been.

' _Staying hidden would be the prudent move for him. Until he is forced to reveal himself. But dare I operate under the assumption that he has truly returned? Doing so could cause me to make grievous errors. It could prevent me from thwarting his return'_

This was no chess game, where the pieces were mindless conjurations.

Human lives were at stake.

Not just those who would die or be injured, but those whose lives would be irreversibly changed.

People like Harry.

A glimmer of happiness crept into Albus' eyes. He was getting through to the boy, he could see it. Appealing to his love for learning was definitely the correct move.

' _I just need to keep it up. To show him that he is cared for and loved. That should help him find peace. Help him break through his anger'_

Far, far too much anger still swam in those emerald eyes.

Albus knew he deserved the anger aimed at him. He had bought and paid for it.

But anger would only lead to bitterness and hate.

And those would only lead to a lifetime of misery.

' _After all, I have put Harry through, he deserves a happy life. And if Tom is returning or has returned, then he has enough pain in his near future before that happiness can come. I just have to ensure that if, no, when he wins, he has reason to live. And enjoy life'  
_

"Oh, Fawkes," he said softly. "Sometimes the weight of all these responsibilities wears down on me"

Fawkes responded with a soft trill, filling the room with joy and life.

"Would you sing for me, my dear friend? Just for a few minutes, before I start my search"

Fawkes sang. Albus let the music wash over him, wiping away his fatigue and worry. Removing his stress and pain.

When the song was over, he opened his eyes with purpose.

It was time to find Mundungus.

He would not hide away in his office while disaster looms. Not again.

Never again.

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 **WE'RE GETTING CLOSER TO THE END OF THIS YEAR. STILL A FEW MORE CHAPTERS TO GO THOUGH.**

 **YEAR 4(STILL UNNAMED) WILL BE POSTED AS A SEPERATE STORY. ADD ME TO AUTHOR ALERTS TO FIND OUT WHEN THAT BEGINS POSTING.**


	18. Chapter 13

**AN:I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY!**

 **WARNING: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION OF CHILD RAPE.**

Chapter 13

"Crucio!"

The pale jet of light hit the rabbit and did nothing.

Theo growled. "Why isn't it working?" He demanded.

"I told you. You need to want to cause pain-"

"I have been!"

"Not enough!"

Harry rubbed his forehead and checked his watch.

' _Still got time'_

"Are you sure I shouldn't just ask Snape or-"

"Trust me, Theo! I know this spell. Listen. Just, imagine the rabbit is the person you hate most in the world. Think about how much you hate them, how much you want them to suffer-"

"I'm trying! But it isn't them, it's just a stupid bunny and-"

"That's why I said imagine!"

Harry glared at Theo for a moment.

"Think about the guy who killed your mother," he said softly. "How he fucking ruined your life. He deserves to suffer, doesn't he? Don't you want to see him scream? See him in pain? Think about that. Feel nothing but the hate"

"Who do you think about when you do it?"

Harry bit back his first retort, which had been to shout that it was none of Theo's business. Instead, he regarded his friend critically before saying.

"If you manage it tonight, I'll tell you"

Theo looked like he wanted to say something. After a moment, he nodded and closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

Almost ten minutes later he opened them again, raising his wand.

"Crucio!"

The abandoned classroom was lit up as the red light shot towards the hapless rabbit.

The rabbit squealed and shook, falling over completely.

When the curse was lifted, it lay on its side and panted, still twitching.

"How do you feel?"

Theo turned to him with wide eyes.

"I-good. I managed it!"

"You did. Good? Not incredibly amazing?"

"No, just good. Why?"

Harry shrugged. "Some people react strongly to it. I do. Feels a lot better for me to use it than for you"

"Oh"

There was silence for a bit until Theo broke it.

"How long did it take you to manage it?"

"Oh," Harry said, scratching the back of his neck. "I got it on the first time"

Theo whistled softly.

"Yup," Harry said, full of embarrassed pride.

"So?"

"So what?"

' _Fuck. Why did I agree to it?'_

"So, who do you think about when you cast it?"

"Just a muggle. It doesn't matter"

' _Leave it. Just fucking leave it'_

"I'm pretty sure it does matter. If you hate him so much-"

"I said it doesn't fucking matter, ok?!"

"C'mon, Harry, you said you'd tell me"

' _Only cause I thought you wouldn't manage the fucking spell'_

"I don't w-"

"I've told you the truth about my mother. Barely anyone knows that"

"Theo-"

"Is it the guy who your boggart turned into?"

' _How dare you!'_

Without even making a conscious decision, Harry's wand was out.

"I don't want to talk about it" he whispered.

"Someone once told me, the world doesn't care about what you want"

Harry's expression didn't change.

' _Try using my own lines on me? Fuck you!'_

"Theo, you're-"

"You know what my boggart turned into. Why I hate that guy so much. Why do you hate that muggle so much?"

"IT DOESNT FUCKING MATTER! HE'S DEAD!"

"It matters if just thinking about him gets you so angry. You need to talk about this, and-"

"Don't you fucking dare tell me what I need" Harry hissed.

"Just listen, you need-"

"Crucio!"

Theo managed to twist out of the way of the curse.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!" He shouted betrayal and anger etched into his face.

"I TOLD YOU, I DONT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT, AND YOU JUST HAVE TO FUCKING PUSH AND NEEDLE, AND-"

"MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE AGREED TO TELL ME THEN! MAYBE I SHOULD NEVER HAVE TRUSTED YOU WITH ANYTHING, CAUSE FRIENDSHIP IS CLEARLY A ONE WAY STREET WITH YOU!"

Harry looked into Theo's flushed face. The boy looked like he was nearly bursting into tears.

"Fine, Theo, you want to fucking know? You want to know what he did?" His voice was low, dangerous.

"Yeah, I do! I want you to trust me enough-"

"He raped me. He made me suck him off, and he fucked me. Over and over again. He made me tell him how much I liked it, and how I wanted it"

Theo looked horrified. Harry went on.

"Started when I was seven. Was slow at first. He fucked me for the first time on my ninth birthday. He didn't like to do that too often though"

"Harry, I-"

Harry's eyes flashed. Almost too fast to see, he had his wand pressed against Theo's chest.

"You wanted to hear this, didn't you?" He hissed. "You said I need to talk about it. So you have to fucking listen!"

He carried on in the same conversational tone he had been using before.

"He didn't like to do it too often. Said it would make me stretch. He wanted me to bleed. He liked it. He liked having me suck my own blood off of his cock"

Theo tried to say something. Harry pressed his wand in harder.

"And one day, well. I just snapped. Accidental magic, of course. But I made him go home and hang himself. Felt bad about it afterward, too"

Harry giggled.

"I felt bad about it. How fucked up is that? I felt bad about killing the fucking pedo"

He looked Theo dead in the eyes.

"Is that what you wanted to hear? Give you some nice wank fantasies for tonight?"

"No, Harry, Merlin, I-"

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up."

Theo did.

"I have to go to Magical Theory now. If you ever tell anyone-"

"I won't"

Harry ignored the interjection completely.

"If you ever tell anyone," he said, seriously, as a single tear rolled down his cheek, "I'll make you die screaming. No fucking joke, I'll make you beg me to kill you"

* * *

"Yes, Miss Granger?"

"Professor, we've just been talking about how spells are all based on intention, and how the wandwork and incantations are only really a way to focus. I was just wondering, if so, how come sometimes when the incantation is mispronounced it has a totally different result to the real spell? Surely it should just result in nothing?"

' _You really do love the sound of your voice, don't you, you stuck up bitch?'_

Waffling focused on Granger.

' _Please, please tell her that she's a stupid, good for nothing piece of shit. Wipe that self-satisfied smile off of her fucking face. Make her miserable'_

"Five points to Gryffindor"

Harry groaned internally.

"Let me answer your question with a question of my own"

' _I should have just skived off. Why the fuck did I even come here now? Fuck you, Theo, I wish I could just fucking kill you'  
_

"The first time in history that a spell is cast. Was that spell just invented, or discovered?"

"Invented," Granger said immediately.

"Why do you say that?"

"I've seen books that talk about spellcrafting, so I figured that spells are invented?" Granger was sounding less sure of herself as she went on.

' _Maybe she realizes how fucking ridiculous she sounds. Fuck. I can't concentrate on this shit right now'_

"Nice try, but not everything is contained in books. Does anyone have an opinion? Are spells invented, or discovered? Davis?"

"Invented. If they were discovered, they wouldn't be in a specific language"

"What about wordless casting? What about the fact that many spells have different incantations in other countries? Boot?"

"Discovered. Better wizards use fewer wand movements. If they were a necessary part of the spell, they wouldn't be able to minimize on the motions without losing efficiency"

' _Trust a Ravenclaw to be as wordy as fucking possible. Someone should cut out his tongue'_

"The truth is that it is really mixture"

' _I can't fucking do this right now. I need to meditate or curse something '_

"Yes, Potter?"

"Sorry Professor. Just. I've got a massive headache, could I leave early?"

"Of course!" Waffling said. "Go to the infirmary if you need, or just have an early night. Miss Davis will catch you up on what you miss"

Tracey nodded.

"Thanks"

Harry gathered his stuff and left, trying to look like he was in pain.

* * *

He decided to try for meditation.

' _Snape would probably kill me if I use the Unforgivables as a stress release again'_

He sat on his bed, cross-legged, and closed his eyes.

He tried to clear his mind, but it took much longer than usual. Eventually, though, he managed.

He stayed like that, doing nothing for the best part of half an hour.

By the time he was finished, he was feeling much better.

' _Better than usual even. Maybe Theo was right. Maybe I did need to talk about it'_

Maybe. Maybe not. Either way, Harry still hadn't exactly forgiven his friend.

' _At least I don't want to Crucio him now. Seriously, what the fuck was I thinking?_ _I wasn't. That's the problem. That's exactly what Snape was talking about. I wasn't thinking, and I almost tortured one of my friends'_

It was actually quite horrifying.

' _Can I even tell Snape about this? He'll just tell me to clear my mind more. Fuck. This isn't good'_

Harry cleared his mind again, relaxing all his muscles as he sank into his bed.

He hadn't closed the curtains around his four-poster, and the location of his bed gave him a view of the bedroom door.

So he saw the instant Theo walked in.

"Theo" he exclaimed, jumping off of his bed.

Theo shrunk back, raising his arms.

' _Fuck!'_

"No, Theo! I don't want to hurt you! I want to apologize" he said, the words coming out in a rush. "I shouldn't have tried to, to-"

"To Crucio me?" Theo said softly.

"Yeah. I wasn't thinking, and-"

"I get it, Harry. I do. I mean, I can't relate to what you went through, but I get why you reacted like that"

"Yeah," Harry said sheepishly. "I've never spoken about it before. You may have been right about needing to talk about it"

Theo laughed humorlessly. "I'm always right. Harry" he said gently, "have you ever thought about seeing a mind healer?"

"I'm not crazy," Harry said quickly.

' _Am I? Normal people don't like torturing and killing. Maybe I am crazy'_

"They're not just for crazy people, I-"

"Nope. No mind healer. Not crazy. Haven't seen a psychiatrist either. A priest, yeah, but that was different"

He giggled slightly at that.

"Harry-"

"Theo. I'm still a bit pissed off. Don't push it, ok?"

"Ok, ok" Theo threw his arms up in surrender. "But I do think you need to talk about it a bit more. And a mind healer helped me get over what I saw with my mum"

"No mind healer"

"At least talk to Snape!" Was Theo's exasperated response. "I mean, I'd offer, but I don't think I'm really suited for this type of thing"

"No, you're not". Harry didn't notice the look of hurt that quickly crossed on Theo's face. "Maybe Snape, though. Maybe"

"Just think about it, ok?"

"Yup. We're cool?"

"Yeah"

"Good"

Harry decided that he would talk to Snape about it. Strange as it was, he actually felt better after his rant to Theo.

It had been quite cathartic, really. To be able to say it. Like putting it behind him.

Of course, it would have to wait until after the Quidditch finals. He was simply too exhausted after training to even think about finding Snape, and he didn't have that much free time otherwise. Especially not with exams coming up.

* * *

"Anything interesting in there?"

"Not really. Some stuff about Crouch. The bastard's finally dead"

"Crouch?" Harry asked once he swallowed his bacon.

"He was a true asshole," Draco said, folding the paper up and passing it to Harry. "He was head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement during the last war. Really had it out for anyone suspected of being Death Eaters"

"Yeah?" Harry said, glancing at the headline.

 _ **BARTEMIUS CROUCH DEAD AT 71**_

It shouted. As if anyone really cared.

"Yeah. Allowed Aurors to use the unforgivables, and stuff like that. He lost prestige after they found out about his son, though"

"His son?"

"He was a Death Eater. He got caught with my aunt and uncle"

"Wait, weren't they the ones-"

"Who tortured the Longbottoms? Yeah"

Harry laughed. "So he's out crucioing people into insanity while his father is trying to catch him?"

"Pretty much"

"Wow"

"Yeah. He died in Azkaban, I think"

"Crazy"

"Get this, his dad sentenced him there himself!"

"Super crazy"

* * *

"They're smart. But guess what? We're known to be smart too"

"Cunning, Marcus. Cunning and sly"

"Shut up! Just pay attention for once, Bole"

"Fine"

"They might have some crazy strategies planned. But we've been watching them for a while now"

"Trying to stave off the boredom-"

"Shut the fuck up, Bole!"

Flint took a deep breath.

"Fuck it. Get out there and crush them. We've got better brooms and better players. Let's prove it"

They marched on to the field, the sunlight harsh in their eyes.

Madam Hooch laid out the rules as Flint and the Ravenclaw captain, Roger Davies, stared each other down.

The whistle blew, and fourteen brooms flew into the air.

A few seconds later the whistle blew again, and the balls were released.

"AND THEY'RE OFF! DEFENDING CHAMPIONS SLYTHERIN FACING THE MIGHT OF RAVENCLAW! WILL THIS BE THE GAME THAT BREAKS THE SLYTHERIN STREAK? ONLY TIME WILL TELL IF OUR HOPES COME TRUE-"

"FOCUS ON GAMEPLAY, JORDAN!"

"SORRY! AND ITS SLYTHERIN IN POSSESSION, FLINT PASSES TO PUCEY, PUCEY'S RACING AHEAD, HE PASSES TO POTTER, OOOH"

Harry rolled into a dive to avoid the bludger flying at his head. He managed to recover and pass back to Pucey, just managing to dodge the next Bludger.

"A bit of help, Derrick?" He called out.

The beater just smiled and waved.

"AND PUCEY'S GOING FOR IT. HE SCORES. 10-0, TO SLYTHERIN"

Harry punched the air.

AND BACK IN PLAY, WE'VE GOT CREST WITH POSSESSION. NICE DODGE THERE! WILL HE BALANCE THE SCALES?"

He wouldn't. Flint managed to intercept and passed to Harry.

They moved forward towards the Ravenclaw goals, passing back and forth between them.

"AND POTTER SCORES. 20-0 TO SLYTHERIN"

"AND ITS WITON WITH THE QUAFFLE. HE PASSES TO CREST, PASSES TO CORNER. AND CORNER SCORES! 20-10 TO SLYTHERIN"

The game went on. Harry scored a few more, managed to just dodge a bludger aimed at his face, and helped set up another few goals.

"AND PUCEY SCORES. 90-70 TO SLYTHERIN"

He heard the crowd's screams and turned before Jordan even got the words out.

"AND THE SLYTHERIN SEEKER PULLS INTO A DIVE. CHANG'S HOT ON HIS HEELS. COME ON CHANG, DONT LET THAT SLIMY-"

"JORDAN!"

Jordan let out a loud groan. "MALFOY GETS THE SNITCH. SLYTHERIN WINS 240-70. AND SLYTHERIN TAKES THE CUP. AGAIN"

* * *

In their next training session with Snape, Harry finally managed to cast a proper Patronus.

The mist eventually settled into the shape of a gleaming silver crow.

"Wow!" Harry called out, watching the bird preen.

"Well done. I think twenty points to Slytherin are in order" Snape said.

Harry snorted softly.

"Sir?" He asked. "What does the Patronus' shape mean?"

Snape looked at him closely.

"That is not a simple question to answer. There is no single definition of what a person's Patronus means"

"I meant-"

"I know what you meant. The shape one's Patronus takes could be dependent on anything from their true love to their animagus form or even a symbolic representation of their personality"

"Oh"

"Indeed. I do not know much about animal symbolism. If you are truly interested, you can surely find a useful book in the library"

"Yeah," Harry said, still watching his crow. Eventually, it dissipated totally, leaving him with a strange sense of loss.

"How has your emotional control been of late?"

' _I came very close to torturing or even killing someone I consider a good friend. I've had to fight off the desire to just Imperius Pansy a bunch of times'_

"It's been ok. A bit worse than before, but ok"

"Worse?" Snape asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah. Uh, I'd like to talk you about some stuff actually. In private, if we could. About my childhood"

' _And now I have to fucking go through with it'_

Snape frowned for an instant.

"Tomorrow evening is suitable?"

"Yeah. I think so"

"Fine. In the meantime, I wish to test your Occlumency"

Snape stared into his eyes. Harry felt it almost immediately.

"You're in"

"Correct. Now, try to stop me"

Images started flying through Harry's head. Half-remembered glimpses of his childhood, bits of lessons, him bending his head to lap at Pansy's-

"You need to work on that" Snape said. "You could detect my presence, but your defense is practically non-existent"

"How do I change that?" Harry said, ignoring the blush spreading across his cheeks.

' _Well, now Snape knows what a naked Pansy looks like. I wonder if he's grateful?'_

"For now you will focus on simply clearing your mind when you detect my presence. Clear your mind, and force it to stay clear"

"Wouldn't that make it obvious that I'm hiding something? If someone looks into my mind, and suddenly it just goes blank-"

"It would, which is why once you prove to be capable of resisting my will to pull out information, we will work on false memories"

"False memories?"

Snape sighed. "Isn't it obvious? It is the art of using Occlumency to create false memories and thus lead a Legilemens astray"

"Oh," Harry said, lamely

"Indeed. We will meet tomorrow evening. Draco, let us test your Occlumency progress"

* * *

"So, Harry. What did you want to discuss?"

Harry let his eyes wander around the room, looking at all the strange ingredients on the shelves.

"I- when I was seven years old," he said, still not meeting Snape's eyes, "There was this man who used to work at the orphanage. He was like the orphanage's Filch"

Heart racing, Harry took a deep breath. Focusing on his Professor's pointed chin, he continued.

"He had this office. A broom closet, really. He had a chair in there, and his toolboxes and stuff. And one day, he-he said he wanted to talk to me"

' _Why am I doing this? Fuck, why?'_

When Harry next spoke, it was in an emotionless, mechanical voice.

"He-he made me get on my knees. And he made me-"

Right then, a silver Phoenix burst into the room.

It spoke in Dumbledore's calm voice.

"Emergency staff meeting in my office now. Stop whatever you are doing and get there as soon as possible. This is to do with the Sirius Black situation. This is an emergency"

The Patronus flashed brightly and vanished.

Snape stood up, glancing down at Harry.

"We will have to continue at a later point. I'm sorry for this, but I have to go"

"Of course," Harry said, bile filling his throat.

' _I finally work up the courage, and you have to stop me?! Fuck you, Dumbledore, fuck you, Black!'_

Snape pauses before leaving his office.

"You should head back to the dorms. Do you have your invisibility cloak?"

"Yeah"

"Wear it. I don't know what's going on with Black, and you don't want to take any chances"

"But the Dark-"

"I know what he said! Still, twelve years in Azkaban is enough to destroy anyone's sanity. Do me a favor, and wear your cloak"

"Fine" Harry said, standing up and pulling it out. "I will"

"And be on your guard. We will continue this conversation"

"Yeah, sure"

Snape gave him a sharp look before leaving the room.

A few seconds later, Harry left as well, unseen.

' _Fuck you, Sirius Black. First dementors, now this? You fucking ruin everything'_

 **AS ALWAYS, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW**

 **ANOTHER FEW CHAPTERS UNTIL YEAR 4: HARRY POTTER AND THE RETURN OF THE LOST BEGINS POSTING. ADD ME TO AUTHOR ALERTS FOR NEWS ON THAT**


	19. Chapter 14

AN: I OWN NOTHING

PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME

ENJOY!

Chapter 14

"I'm sure the Hogwarts rumor mill has been running overtime since the events of last night. I believe, Harry, that since these events directly affect you, you deserve an explanation"

"Thank you, sir. I'd appreciate that"

Dumbledore was right. The theories had abounded. Ever since Dumbledore, McGonagall, and Flitwick has walked into the castle with Sirius Black and another, unidentified wizard in custody, everyone had been practically losing their minds.

"As you know, it has always been believed that Sirius Black, as Secret Keeper, had betrayed your parents to Voldemort. Following that, Peter Pettigrew chased him down. Black killed Pettigrew, along with thirteen muggles. He was sent to Azkaban, and the case was closed"

Dumbledore sighed.

"Yesterday, I received a letter from Sirius. Delivered by a cat, in fact. In the letter, Sirius made some surprising claims"

"What did he say?"

Dumbledore looked more and more forlorn as he spoke. "He claimed that he had not been the secret keeper. He had switched with Pettigrew. After the switch, Pettigrew betrayed them. When he realized what had happened, he chased down Peter. Peter made it look like Sirius blew up the street, and faked his own death. He was an unregistered animagus. He turned into a rat and escaped"

' _Useful talent to have'_

"Sirius claimed to have captured Peter. He said he would be able to prove his innocence. However, he said I must come alone. He was hiding in the Shrieking Shack, and he claimed to only trust me"

' _Idiot'_

"I took Professor McGonagall and Professor Flitwick along. Professor McGonagall is herself an animagus, and while I may be a Transfiguration Master, she knows the animagus transformation better than nearly anyone. And Professor Flitwick is a dueling champion"

"So why was Professor Snape summoned?"

"I wasn't going to leave the castle undefended, was I? Besides, the other teachers needed to meet with the Aurors upon their arrival"

"What happened in the Shrieking Shack, sir?"

"I was meant to be going in alone. So Professor McGonagall assumed her animagus form, and Professor Flitwick disillusioned himself. When we entered, we found Sirius Black sitting at a table. He held a rat. After tying him up, I tested the rat. Imagine my shock, Harry, when I discovered Sirius had been telling the truth. The rat was an animagus. When forced to reveal himself, he was shown to be Peter Pettigrew"

"Do you think he was telling the truth? Black?"

Dumbledore's eyes were far away.

"It could be. The idea of Peter betraying your parents makes far more sense than Sirius. Peter was never as accepted amongst your father's friends. More than that, Peter has been unable to give a satisfactory reason for living as a rat for more than a decade"

Dumbledore sighed, again.

"And I believe Peter has the Dark Mark"

' _You know nothing, remember?'_

"What's that, sir?"

"Ah, I forget sometimes. The Dark Mark was Voldemort's sign. He burned it into his followers' arms. He could use it to summon them. Of course, they are capable of hiding it, but you can sense it if you know how to look"

' _Shit. Good thing I wasn't marked'_

"So what happens now, sir?"

"Now? There will be a trial. In a week's time, I believe. You can come if you wish. The outcome will affect you"

"How so?"

Dumbledore frowned slightly. "Harry, Sirius Black is your Godfather. Legally, if he is capable, he is your guardian. You would live with him"

' _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I don't want to. Who the fuck-'_

"The first thing he asked after telling his tale was if he could see you"

' _I owe him nothing! He should have stayed and taken me in, instead of going after his revenge. Fuck him, I want to live with the Malfoys"_

"Of course, he will have to spend some time in Saint Mungo's. No-one comes out of Azkaban unscathed. Definitely not after twelve long years"

' _So I'm going to live with someone crazier than I am? Fuck that'_

"Sir?" Harry said, tentatively. "Would I have to live with him? I mean, I don't know him, and I've been staying at the Malfoys, they've been like family to me!"

Something crossed Dumbledore's expression right then.

"Harry, I believe it would be best if you lived with your legal guardian. Perhaps you would be able to split your time between Sirius and the Malfoys? Assuming the trial vindicates him, of course"

' _Fuck'_

"Why can't they just use a truth potion? I read about veritaserum, wouldn't that just clear everything up?"

Dumbledore chuckled. "Of course you've read about it. Veritaserum is not accepted as evidence. There are too many flaws with it"

"Flaws?"

"Yes," Dumbledore smiles at Harry. "Magic doesn't solve everything. Veritaserum can be bested in a number of ways. Mental magic can be used to defeat it, as can half-truths. Not to mention it is possible to build a resistance to it, or even to just take the antidote ahead of time"

Harry simply nodded.

"If you wish to be present at the trial, please let me know ahead of time. Professor Snape will bring you, and I will need to arrange a replacement"

"I want to come," Harry said immediately.

"Very well. In the meanwhile, I would suggest studying for your exams. You wouldn't want to ruin your excellent record, would you?"

"I've already started"

"Of course you have," Dumbledore said quietly.

* * *

"Do you feel up to continuing our conversation?"

Harry shrugged.

' _Not even a little bit'_

"Harry, I can't help you at all unless you are willing to talk"

"It hurts to talk about it" Harry whispered.

"So why did you bring it up?"

"Because it also helps. Afterward, it helps"

"So is it not worth dealing with some pain to improve your overall situation?"

Harry shrugged again, looking down.

"You find it hard to accept that the situation can be bettered, don't you?"

"It's not that"

"So what is it?"

"It's just-I shouldn't still have to be dealing with this! It was years ago!"

"And yet, you still are. Perhaps you simply never dealt with it in the first place"

"Maybe"

The room fell quiet. Snape waited for Harry to speak. As the silence began growing oppressive, Harry did.

"He raped me," he said quietly. "And it hurt. It fucked me up. It made me feel weak. Useless. I couldn't even defend myself. I couldn't even make him stop"

"But you did. Eventually, you did"

"I couldn't control that. It just happened. I was weak, and he made me feel like I deserved it"

"Did you?"

Harry slumped. "I don't know. I was just a kid. But I couldn't stop it, so I must have"

"You did not deserve that. No child deserves to be treated like that. And I highly doubt there exists a single child who could have defended against that"

Harry shrugged again.

"Would anyone be able to do that to you now?"

Harry looked up sharply. "No. I'd kill them"

"So why are you still afraid of it? Why are you still afraid of him?"

"Who said I'm afraid of him?" Harry's voice rose sharply as he spoke.

"He is the shape your boggart takes, is he not?"

"Who told you that?" Harry all but shouted. "I told them not to talk about it! I made sure-"

"Lupin," Snape said quietly.

"How the fuck did he think-"

"He called a meeting with Dumbledore and myself. He was concerned"

"It was none of his business!"

"Perhaps. Nevertheless, he believed it was"

"I don't care what he thought, he-"

"Harry. It is done. Why are you so afraid of this man, still?"

"Because-because he fucked up my childhood!"

"Are you afraid of him, or what he represents?"

"What?"

"Are you afraid of him, the man who sexually abused you, or what he represents?"

"What do you think he represents?"

"He represents you being weak. You being able to be hurt"

"I-I-"

"Many of your actions could be attributed to that. The amount of effort you put into learning combat spells, for example. You don't allow yourself to be vulnerable"

"So what? Why is that a bad thing?"

"It isn't. Unless you let it control you. Unless it drives you, chooses your every move for you"

"And how am I meant to stop that?"

"First, whenever you think of yourself as weak, or think of what was done to you, clear your mind, and-"

"That's all you fucking say! Clear your mind, clear your mind, but-"

"Silence. This is obviously difficult for you, but I will not tolerate insolence"

Taking a deep breath, Snape continued. "Clear your mind, and list the reasons why you are not weak. Why such a thing could not be done to you now"

Harry looked extremely unconvinced.

"What thought gives you the opposite feeling? One of strength, as opposed to weakness?"

"When I think about what I've done to other people"

Snape went absolutely still for a minute, before sighing. "Then focus on that. Think of how you have wielded power over others"

Harry nodded.

"Harry. What was done to you is in the past. You must leave it there. It only matters so much as you allow it to still affect you"

"Thanks" Harry muttered.

Snape just stared at him for a few minutes, before sighing again.

"The day after tomorrow I will be taking you to watch your godfather's trial. Are you prepared for that?"

"Yeah"

Snape watched him warily. "There will be much discussion about your parents, are you-"

"They mean nothing to me. I never knew them. They might as well have been strangers"

Snape watched him for another few minutes. "Very well. Be ready to leave at 7 In the morning. We will floo there"

"Sir?"

"Yes?"

"Dumbledore said how Black is my godfather. If he is declared innocent, will I really have to live with him?"

"Probably, at least for some of the time"

"But I don't know this guy! I'd much rather stay at the Malfoys-"

"But legally, it is his right. If you refuse entirely, and he turns to the law, it will draw undesired attention to the Malfoys. Do you want anyone looking too closely at what is going on in Malfoy Manor at the moment?"

"No," Harry said sullenly.

"Then there is your answer. You simply need to convince Black to allow you to spend time at the Malfoys. You will be fine"

"Easy for you to say" Harry muttered as he walked out.

* * *

"Sirius Orion Black. Before we commence with the main purpose of our trial, we would like you to tell us how you managed to escape from Azkaban prison"

Sirius looked up at Madam Bones. He was sitting, chains sneaking up his arms, in a chair in the center of the courtroom. The same courtroom Lockhart had been tried in.

A few feet away from him, Pettigrew sat, also chained to a chair. While Sirius didn't look too nervous, apart from the occasional twitch, Pettigrew seemed downright terrified.

"I'm an unregistered animagus," Black said, in a hoarse, rasping voice. "No one knew, so nothing was put in place to prevent me changing form"

"As simple as that?" Bones said, her pince-nez rising on her face.

"I needed a strong enough reason to push my mind into action. I got that when I saw proof that Pettigrew was alive"

Muttering arose in the courtroom.

"What proof was that?"

"I was given a copy of the Daily Prophet. There was an article about the Weasleys winning the lottery. It had a family picture. I saw the son's pet rat. It was Peter"

"How could you have been so sure?"

Sirius laughed. Peter squirmed.

"We became animagi together. Peter needed our help to manage it. We were still at Hogwarts then. I must have seen him change a hundred times if I saw him do it once. I'd recognize that fucking rat anywhere"

"You will watch your tone"

"Sorry. Twelve years in Azkaban does things to your speech patterns"

The muttering grew louder.

"Order" Bones shouted, banging her little hammer.

"Sirius Orion Black. You will be questioned on the events leading up to the Halloween 1981. You will answer truthfully"

Sirius nodded.

"Tell the court what transpired"

"We received information that Voldemort was going after James and Lily. They went into hiding, under the Fidelius. Dumbledore cast it, and I was Secret Keeper. But they started going after me. I got worried. I thought it would only be a matter of time until they caught me"

Sirius stopped talking. He was breathing very quickly, arms straining against the chains.

"I told James. I suggested we switch secret keepers. Not tell anyone. Let them keep going after me, and if the Death Eaters caught me I wouldn't be able to spill the beans. Eventually, I got James to agree"

Sirius was weeping now. He still managed to talk though, voice changing pitch on every second word.

"He agreed to make Peter the Secret Keeper. Only me, James and Lily, and Peter knew. Peter was gonna go into hiding. I was the only one who knew where he was. I went to check on him a few days later. That was Halloween"

"And?" Madam Bones prompted.

"The fucker wasn't there! I went to James and Lily. And. And. And"

"They had been killed?"

Sirius' howl of rage and pain shocked more than one audience member.

"They were dead! And then Hagrid arrived! I wanted to take Harry, but Dumbledore had sent Hagrid to take the boy to him. So I went after Peter"

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Yes, why? Why did you feel it necessary to chase Pettigrew?"

"I-I-I. I WANTED TO KILL HIM! HE BETRAYED US ALL!"

"You went after him with the intent of murdering him?"

"Wouldn't have been murder" Sirius said bitterly. "Would have been balancing the scales"

"Whatever you wish to call it. Your intention was to kill him?"

"Yes. Kill him, bring him in. I don't know. I wasn't thinking clearly. James and Lily were-were-"

He howled again, an animalistic scream.

"Mr. Black. Control yourself"

Through red-rimmed eyes, Sirius looked up at her.

"What happened when you found him?"

"We dueled. It drew a crowd of muggles. His spells kept going wide, and I was trying to shield the muggles. He shouted something, about how I killed James and Lily. He cast some spell. I don't know what, but it blew up the street. I saw him changing form. And I just collapsed among the bodies and the wreckage. I think I was laughing"

"Why were you laughing?"

"Because I was losing my fucking mind! My best friends had been murdered, someone I considered a friend had betrayed us, and I had just been framed"

"No further questions for now. The Wizengamot calls on Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore"

Dumbledore stood up.

"Chief Warlock Dumbledore. Is it true that you placed a Fidelius charm for James and Lily Potter?"

"It is"

"And Sirius Black was the Secret Keeper?"

"Correct"

"Tell us, please, is it possible for the Secret Keeper to name another as Secret Keeper in their stead?"

"It is very possible. Regardless of Mr. Black's tale, we have many historical precedents for this"

"And this would not require the presence of the caster? The caster, would in fact, not need to be aware of this?"

"The caster would not need to be aware of this, correct"

"Thank you, Chief Warlock. That will be all"

Dumbledore day back down. Many of the Wizengamot wore thoughtful expressions.

"The Wizengamot calls on Oscar Cordimon"

A skinny wizard with long hair stood up.

"Obliviator Cordimon, along with the Chief Unspeakable of the cave of memories, you have examined Mr. Black's memories of the events in discussion?"

"We have"

"What is your opinion?"

"The subject's memories do not seem to have been altered. They reflect what he has told the court exactly"

Excited muttering broke out.

"Based on his memories, you would agree with his testimony?"

"Yes"

"Thank you. Please take your seat"

"Peter Pettigrew" Madam Bones called out, silencing everyone. "What is your version of events?"

"I-I. After You-Know-Who killed James and Lily, Sirius attacked me! He's lying, I was never Secret keeper!"

"Why have you spent the last twelve years living as a rat? Why did you fake your death?"

"I-I was afraid!" Peter shook as he spoke.

' _Disgusting'_

"Afraid of what?"

"Afraid of him!" Peter tried to point at Sirius, but couldn't quite raise his hand.

"Mr. Black was in Azkaban. What reason did you have to fear him?"

"He escaped, didn't he!" Pettigrew shouted shrilly.

"How could you have possibly known he would escape? In fact, if you would have announced that he was an animagus, escape would have been impossible for him"

"I-I. He was o-obviously trained by you-know-who, and-"

"You fucking take that back!" Black shouted.

"Mr. Black!"

"You take that back!" Black shouted again, ignoring Madam Bones' calls. "Me, trained by Voldemort?"

Pettigrew squealed.

"Why did you do it, Peter? You were afraid-"

"Mr. Black! Be silent, or-"

"We would have died for you! Every one of us, and-"

"Mr Black! Be-"

"Liar!" Peter shouted. "You all hated me! I was always the butt of your jokes! And when I found someone who treated me with respect, who saw what I could offer him, I-"

Pettigrew squeaked loudly.

Sirius looked at him with a savage triumph.

The courtroom was deathly silent.

"Mr. Pettigrew. Are you admitting to-"

"I did it, ok! But only because he would have killed me otherwise!"

"You should have died! Died, rather-"

A jet of light hit Black. Even though he continued to open and shut his mouth, clearly forming words, no noise came out.

"Mr. Pettigrew. You are claiming that you betrayed the Potters out of fear for your life?"

Pettigrew looked down, utterly defeated. "Yes," he said softly.

"And what of your attack on the muggles? You left thirteen bodies"

"I was acting in self-defense, and-"

"You were capable of acting without murdering them. You clearly were attempting to frame Mr. Black"

"I-"

"You refused to provide us with memories of that time period. Answer honestly. Were you serving You-Know-Who?"

"I was-I was trying to-"

"Tell us the truth, and perhaps we may be lenient"

"Please! I was terrified! He was winning the war, and I just wanted to survive!"

"So you betrayed your friends, framed an innocent man, and aided a known enemy of the Wizarding world. All in favor of declaring Sirius Orion Black innocent of all charges?"

Every single hand was raised.

"Sirius Black. You are the victim of a great miscarriage of justice. You have the apology of the court. You deserve far, far more. You are hereby remanded into the custody of Saint Mungo's. As soon as you are declared fit, you will be returned to Wizarding society"

The chains on his arms retracted. Sirius looked up in total disbelief.

"All in favor of the Dementors kiss for Pettigrew?"

Harry tried to count the hands, there were too many. Definitely more than half.

' _Holy shit! That was so quick!'_

"Peter Pettigrew. You are an absolute disgrace to the name of wizardry. You are a disgrace to the name of friendship and loyalty. You will suffer the Dementor's kiss. Your body will be remanded to the Department of Mysteries for study. The sentence will be carried out immediately"

Ignoring Pettigrew's cries and protests, an auror walked past him to a door in the back of the courtroom.

A Dementor followed the auror back into the courtroom.

Immediately, the temperature in the room dropped dramatically.

The Dementor began gliding towards Pettigrew.

"PLEASE! YOU PROMISED LENIENCY!"

Madam Bones looked down at him. A puddle was growing at his feet.

"This is more lenient than you deserve," she said quietly.

The Dementor reached him. His struggles and whimpers lessened dramatically.

Long, dead fingers gripped his chin, forcing his face up.

The Dementors lowered its hood.

It was facing away from Harry, so he couldn't see what it was underneath. Pettigrew could, though.

His screams filled the room.

The Dementor lowered its head until it was mere inches away from Pettigrew's.

A harsh, rattling noise was heard.

Pettigrew's hands drummed out a mad tattoo on his chair. A silvery light could be seen rising through his body.

It exited his mouth, and for a second Harry saw it.

Just a blob, a silvery blob.

It vanished.

The Dementor raised its hood and let go of Pettigrew's chin, causing his head to slump forward onto his chest, a trail of drool leaving his mouth.

The Auror herded the Dementor away with his horse patronus.

When the door finally closed behind it, Madam Bones spoke again, sounding distinctly unnerved.

"Court is adjourned. May God have mercy on our souls"

"Wait!" Black shouted.

' _When was the silencing spell removed?'_

"I was named Harry Potter's Godfather. I want custody of him"

' _Oh. Fuck'_

Madam Bones looked extremely uncertain. "When you are declared mentally fit by the Saint Mungo's staff, you will be granted custody. Provided no one else currently holds custody, of course"

Black was led away by two Aurors then.

As Snape pulled Harry along with him to the floo grates, Harry was not thinking about the fact that he had just seen a man have his soul eaten. He was thinking more about the fact that it hadn't bothered him in the least.

' _Jesus. I really am fucked up, aren't I?'_

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YEAH, ITS A GOOD THING SNAPE ISNT A THERAPIST.


	20. Interlude V

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Interlude V

 _Headmaster's Office, Hogwarts_

Albus Dumbledore sighed as he looked at the old, creased photograph. A single tear dropped from his long, crooked nose onto it.

On his perch, Fawkes seemed to sense his old friend's distress. The Phoenix trilled, leading into a song.

"Not now, Fawkes," Albus said quietly, "sometimes, sadness is deserved"

Fawkes looked put out and placed his head under his wing.

Albus looked down at the picture again. Most of the people in it were dead.

The Prewett brothers, Benny Fenwick, the McKinnons, Lily, and James. The Longbottoms, having suffered a fate worse than death. Sirius, twelve years in Azkaban. Peter, a traitor.

Albus had known when he started the Order that he would not always make the correct decision. As brilliant as he was, he was still only human. And humans make mistakes. Yet, some of those mistakes weighed him down far more than others.

' _I should have been the Secret Keeper. I should have kept more security on Frank and Alice after that Halloween. I should have pushed for a trial for Sirius'_

That one hurt the most. As Chief Warlock, it has been entirely within his power to ensure that Sirius was not tried in absentia. But he hadn't. And Sirius had been the one to pay the price.

Oh, he had meant well, thinking that if he had been tried, Sirius would have been Kissed. Thinking that a life sentence in Azkaban was far better than the possible eternity of torment the Dementors Kiss would cause. But now he knew better. Had he pushed for Sirius to be tried in person, the truth would have come out. Had that been the result, Harry would have had a healthy childhood. He would have been raised by one who loved and cared for him.

' _I was arrogant. Ever has hubris been my flaw'_

So many lives had been ruined due to his mistakes.

And now, the war was staring again.

True, Mundungus often would pull a disappearing act. Usually, however, Albus would be able to track him down as soon as he desired. Mundungus was nowhere to be found. And Mundungus had been spying on a group of former Death Eaters who had started meeting again.

The problem remained, that Albus was standing in the dark. He had so little information, only a few suppositions, and half-formed ideas. The Stone was safe, Nicholas had confirmed that. It still did not rule out the many other methods Tom could have used to recreate a body. Albus could think of several rituals that would fulfill that purpose. If he knew of them, he would have to assume Tom did as well.

' _Dare I make assumptions? Dare I build a battle plan off of a house of cards?'_

Had Tom returned? Albus couldn't say with certainty. He couldn't even hazard enough of a guess to move forward based on it.

' _Even worse, do I dare allow self-doubt to cripple me? We are in the calm before the storm. My actions now could save so many lives'_

But if he made the wrong decisions, they could doom just as many.

' _At least Sirius will gain custody of Harry. If Harry will have to fight Voldemort, let him have time with someone who loves him'_

Dumbledore frowned. He hoped Harry would become close to Sirius. Sirius was a living link to Harry's parents, someone who knew them better than perhaps anyone else. Someone who could shower Harry with the unconditional love and care he so desperately needed.

In the meantime, Albus would have to study and plan.

And hope that he wasn't making an enormous mistake.

* * *

 _Slytherin Common Room_

Pansy Parkinson put her mother's letter aside and sighed. She hated cloak and dagger stuff, and word games and hidden messages really annoyed her.

But if she was reading the letter right, then her mother had been very carefully skirting around saying certain things.

' _I wish to give you advice, but what I must tell you needs to be kept secret. I would need you to make me a promise, one that you would not break before I could speak freely'_

Now, unless Pansy was totally misreading it, her mother wanted her to make an Unbreakable Vow before she would talk about Harry.

That was pretty damn concerning.

' _What can she have to say that needs such secrecy?'_

To put it lightly, Pansy was worried. When she had asked her mother for advice about Harry over Easter break, she had noticed the fear her words caused in her mother. That had been terrifying. Her mother was afraid of nothing. What could Harry have done to worry her so much?

Why was her father, unflappable man that he was, so unwilling to even discuss her boyfriend?

And now this. The Unbreakable Vow.

Whatever it was, it was serious.

And Pansy just wanted to understand her boyfriend.

' _Actually, all I really want is for him to talk to me. To not look at me like I'm some type of-some type of-sex doll or something!'_

But all Harry seemed to want was for her to play with his cock.

' _Why can't I just break it off?'_

She knew the answer to that.

' _Because sometimes, Harry terrifies me. Because I don't know what he would do. Because I think he might hurt me'_

Pansy started crying softly. She'd never admitted it to herself. Never admitted that she was scared of her boyfriend.

And now that she finally had, she felt too fucking terrified to do anything about it.

' _So what, I should just let him use me however he wants? What if he wants to-to-to fuck me? Or worse? I can't just roll over for that'_

She left the common room, walking with her back straight up to her room. Her quill and parchment were up there, and she had to reply to her mother, tell her she would be willing to take any vow her mother wanted. To tell her she needed help.

She came back down a few minutes later to fetch her mother's letter.

No one told her that Daphne had read it while she was gone.

And she didn't notice the small smirk making her friend's lips curl.

* * *

 _Malfoy Manor_

"He is surprisingly lucid, my lord"

Voldemort drummed the fingers of one hand on the arm of his chair and waved with other. Swallowing, Healer Deschain continued.

"I was expecting him to be non-responsive, after years of being under the Imperius, and his time in Azkaban before that. Not to mention the effects that isolation can have on the brain. However, he understands what has happened, and is able to hold a conversation. He does keep apologizing to you, my lord, for failing you"

"How is he physically?"

"Weak. His muscles are particularly weak from a lack of use, and although he is not malnourished, he is below a healthy weight. I believe with a diet and exercise regime, along with some nutritional potions, he should be physically fit in a matter of months. I cannot speak for his mental state clearly enough yet, my lord. I apologize, but I will need more time to speak with him and to observe before having a clear understanding"

"Make a guess"

"I-I. It's hard to say. I believe if he receives company and conversation he will improve. He may need to take potions to help heal his mind, and maybe even Dreamless Sleep at first. Without making any promises, the best I can estimate at this point is to have him mentally functional around the same time as he is physically"

"You may leave. Send Lucius in"

Stammering his thanks, the Healer exited the room.

Lucius came in to find the Dark Lord sitting, hand curled around his chin, deep in thought.

He dropped to his knees before his master and was bid to stand.

"Lucius. How do we stand with preparations for Azkaban?"

"The negotiations with the Dementors continue, My Lord. However, Brutus believes they are coming around. Furthermore, Brutus has managed to place one of our own within the guard force of Azkaban"

"Who?" Voldemort said, interrupting Lucius' smooth drawl.

"Cuthbert Yates, my lord"

"When Yates is next off the island, you will bring him to me"

"As my lord wishes"

"I have almost completed the security measures for my new dwellings, Lucius. I require a house-elf"

"That is wonderful news, my lord, I-"

"I did not ask for your sycophantic mewlings. I asked for a house-elf"

"Apologies, my lord," Lucius said, bowing deeply, "is Tufty acceptable?"

"No. I need an elf that has never served another. Procure one for me"

"It will be done"

"See that it is. Leave me"

As Lucius walked out of the room, Voldemort settled into deep thought once again.

His plans were moving along.

Soon, the time for the world to tremble at his return would arise.

' _Just a few things left to put in place. I need a reporter'_

 **AS ALWAYS: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW**

 **ANOTHER TWO CHAPTERS UNTIL YEAR 4: HARRY POTTER AND THE RETURN OF THE LOST, BEGINS.**


	21. Chapter 15

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M. ME**

 **ENJOY**

Chapter 15

"So, Harry. You ready to live with a probably mad ex-convict?"

"Shut up, Blaise"

"Sorry, sorry," Blaise said, raising his hands in a placating gesture, "I just think it's bizarre, that-"

"Of course it's fucking bizarre!"

"Harry, relax. It's not exactly something you can hide. Not since that article, anyway"

' _Fucking Rita Skeeter'_ Harry thought darkly, ' _bitch has to put everything out there. If she's the one who's gonna write about my childhood...'_

"What I meant, was it's bizarre that one of the biggest news stories of the last thirteen years, was that Black was innocent. And the whole article is talking about how he's gonna get custody of you"

"I know," Harry said, stabbing his bacon. "I haven't even met him, not really"

"But-"

"Yeah, I was at the trial. But I didn't exactly get a chance to speak to him"

"So you saw Pettigrew get the Kiss?" Tracy said eagerly.

"Yeah," Harry said, stabbing his bacon again. It shattered very satisfactorily.

"So?"

"So what?"

"Did you see it?" She half-shouted, half-whispered, "his soul?"

"Yeah. Wasn't much though"

"What do you mean, wasn't much?" She had that look on her face. The one she wore throughout every lesson.

' _God, she's trying to memorize what I'm saying'_

"It was just this blob. A silvery blob. Didn't look like anything"

"What exactly happened? The Dementor just-"

"Just sucked it out. You could see it moving up his chest; then it hung in mid-air for a second, then the Dementor swallowed it"

"What happened to him?"

"Um. They said they're giving his body to the department of mysteries, and-"

"No, no. I meant what happened once his soul was taken?"

"Oh. He was just-done? Like he was nothing. His head just kinda flopped forward, and-"

"Ugh! Do you have to talk about this while we're eating?" Pansy shot them a dirty look.

For a second, hot rage filled Harry.

' _Bitch! You're mine! Don't you-'_

He cleared his mind, almost without having to think about it.

"Sorry babe," he said, putting an arm around her. She tensed, almost imperceptibly.

' _What's that all about?'_

"Blame Tracy though, she brought it up"

"I do blame her," Pansy said, primly, "and I blame you for encouraging her"

* * *

Of course, there were other side effects to the whole Sirius Black being an innocent story.

Side effects such as Peter Pettigrew's hideout for the last twelve years having been brought to light.

"Hey, Weasley" Draco called, "I hear that Pettigrew was going to teach your whole family to turn into rats. Apparently, it would mean you could all have more space in your hovel"

Weasley's ears went a bright red, and he turned around, Granger gripping his arm.

Draco didn't let up though. "I also heard that Pettigrew wanted to hide from the Dark Lord. But he couldn't handle the stench of muggles, so he-"

Draco's speech was cut off by Granger spinning around, and slapping him across the face.

"Lousy, rotten-"

For a moment, no-one could do anything but stare. The bitch actually hit Draco again, and Harry and Theo just watched, wide-eyed.

"Get off me, Ron!" She said, squirming out of Weasley's grip and drawing her wand.

For a moment, all Harry could think of was to Crucio her.

' _Azkaban for life!'_

Sanity quickly reasserted itself, and he hit her with a stupefy instead.

As Granger fell, Weasley gave an unintelligible roar and charged right at the three Slytherins.

' _Idiot hasn't even drawn his wand'_

"Stupefy!"

The red jet hit Weasley, and Harry lowered his wand as the ginger cunt fell to the ground.

"Holy fuck" Theo whispered, sounding awestruck.

"That bitch! That dirty, stinking, mudblood bitch! She hit me"

"We saw," Harry said, still looking down at her prone form.

' _She needs to learn her place'_ a sly voice whispered.

"How dare she! Mudblood bitch!"

' _Teach her a lesson'_

Harry felt something stirring as he looked at the unconscious form.

"So what should we do with her?" He muttered, still not looking up.

"W-what do you mean? Harry?" Theo sounded very nervous.

"She needs to learn a lesson," he said quietly. "Someone needs to put her in her place"

' _Repressed bookworm. She's probably fucking wild if you get her naked'_

"Harry? I-I think we should j-just leave her here. Don't wanna get caught or anything"

"Don't worry, Theo. Draco, what do you think?"

Draco shared a worried look with Theo. Harry still hadn't looked up.

"What did you have in mind?" He asked, impressed at how he managed to keep his voice level.

"I don't know," Harry said, breath coming quicker, "we could take her back to our rooms, or even-Oh!" He straightened his neck, meeting Draco's eyes with his own. "The Chamber of Secrets! You've got to be a parselmouth to get down there!"

"Harry. I don't think that's such a good idea"

"Why not? Look!" He pulled his invisibility cloak out of his pocket, "ta daa! No one will see us taking her, and we could do whatever we want! Just obliviate her afterward, and-"

"You-you're joking, right?"

Harry looked at Theo's horrified face. Out the corner of his eye, he saw Draco's expression.

"Of course!" He gave a blatantly fake laugh.

"Good. I'd rather fuck a dog than a mudblood" Draco said viciously, before spitting on her face.

"Slap me? Fucking whore"

They left the two there, unconscious on the floor.

* * *

"Draco? Is Harry-all right?"

"What do you think?" He muttered in reply. Theo thought for a few minutes before answering.

"No, I don't think he is. Not at all"

"What gives you that impression?" Draco snarled, practically stabbing the parchment with his quill.

"Probably started when he tried to Crucio me".

He looked up to see Draco staring at him, mouth slightly open.

"He-he tried to-"

"Yeah. I managed to dodge it, but-"

"Why? What the fuck did you do?"

"We were talking about something. He told me not to tell anyone"

"Theo" Draco rubbed his forehead, "What were you talking about?"

"I can't say. He told me not to. He'll kill me if I do"

"Theo. You need to-"

"Draco. You need to shut up. I'm not saying, ok? I'm just trying to figure out what the fuck is going on in his head. What happened with Granger today-"

"That was nothing. You have no idea. The shit he's done. The stuff he had to do at our initiation..."

"Yeah?"

Draco looked at him.

"I'll tell you if you tell me"

"C'mon! He told me not to tell!"

"So give me a general subject then"

Theo was silent for a bit, before saying, in a subdued voice, "his childhood"

"He told me all about that! How-"

"Not this part. Not about this"

"How do you-"

"It's about-" Theo looked around nervously, "about that guy his boggart turned into"

Draco hissed as he sucked in air. He'd thought about that, a lot. Wondering what it could be. He had some ideas, but never the courage to actually ask Harry.

"Did he-"

"I'm not saying! Draco, I'm not fucking saying, ok! But I pushed him to talk about it, and he got really angry, and he tried to Crucio me. And then this whole thing today. I'm worried about him. He's gonna get himself into Azkaban"

Draco laughed, utterly humorlessly.

"I've been worried about that for months"

"And?"

"And what? There's nothing I can do about it! I spoke to Snape, but that's it! The stuff the Dark Lord's made him do has-has twisted him"

"What was it?"

' _Screams filled the room. His best friends voice gently asked, "do you renounce?" His best friend carried on flaying the muggle, blood pooling by his feet, as a mad light danced in his eyes"  
_

"The muggles we had to kill. They were both priests. The Dark Lord told Harry to make the one renounce his faith"

Theo watched in horrified fascination as Draco continued, eyes distant.

"And Harry, he just. It was crazy. He was Crucioing this guy and ripping his skin off, and he just kept asking him if he would renounce. In this really soft voice. And he was fucking loving it. He got off on it"

Draco looked at Theo sharply. "When the Dark Lord said that Harry reacts strongly to dark magic, I had no idea what he that meant. I understood that night. This

muggle's blood was spraying everywhere, and Harry just kept on going. And when he pulled off his mask, there was blood on his face. And-and he was smiling! He loved it!"

Theo nodded. He'd seen that look on Harry's face when he had demonstrated the Unforgivables.

"And since then, he's just been-different. Harder. Angrier. Snape said he'd speak to him, but I don't think it helped"

"Pansy's scared of him," Theo said suddenly.

"What?"

"Watch her. When Harry's not looking, she gives him this look. She's scared of him, I'm telling you"

"Fuck"

"What are we gonna do?"

"Talk to Snape, again. Maybe he can think of something"

"I hope he can"

"Trust me, Theo. If anyone can, it's him"

* * *

"Before you all leave, I have your results for the year here"

Everyone quieted down and stopped packing their stuff away as Waffling continued.

"I am pleased to say that each of you has achieved a passing grade. If you wish, you may continue in this class next year"

Harry glanced at the paper that landed on his desk. There was a large "O" scrawled on the top page.

"I have graded you, not only on your assignments but on your classroom participation as well. You will find a breakdown of your mark contained in these pages. Please look at it, and find out what you need to work on in the future"

At the desk beside him, Granger twitched slightly. He tried to see what her report said, but she hurriedly hid it, shooting him a dirty look.

' _Little miss full of herself. If Draco and Theo weren't such pussies, you'd be tied up right now, naked and screaming and-'_

' _What the fuck! Clear your mind!'_

He did, almost missing when Waffling carried on talking.

"Good luck with your exams. I wish you all a most pleasant summer and look forward to seeing you next year. Until then"

* * *

After their final Defence lesson, which had been a boring revision class, Lupin asked Harry to stay behind.

Fiddling with something on his desk, the werewolf said, quite uncomfortably "I'm going to St Mungo's tomorrow. To visit Sirius. I thought, since you're going to be living with him, maybe you'd like to come to meet him?"

' _Oh yes, let me spend more time with the lunatic than I have to'_

' _Although. Maybe it is a good idea. Get a feel for him. Start guilting him. And he is family, of a sort'_

Harry nodded. "Yeah," he said, surprised to feel a lump in his throat, "What time are you gonna go?"

Lupin blinked a few times, and put down the quill he was playing with.

"During lunch. You might miss the lesson immediately afterward, but so close to exams I'm sure it's all revision-"

"It is. And it's charms, Flitwick will let me miss"

"Excellent" the werewolf smiled and seemed to be a totally different person. "Just make sure to tell him, please. And Professor Snape, as well"

"I will"

* * *

Snape eyed the boy sitting before him.

"Repeat that," he said quietly.

"He tried to Crucio Theo. Theo was pushing him to talk about something that happened in his childhood, and Harry tried to Crucio him! Theo dodged it, but still!"

"And what happened with Granger?"

"She attacked me! So Harry stunned her and Weasley-"

"Her attack was unprovoked, I'm sure"

Draco flushed and muttered something.

"Speak up"

"I insulted Weasley, ok? Still, the mudblood had no right to slap me, and-"

"You need to grow up, Draco"

Draco opened and closed his mouth a few times.

"Fortunately, your lack of maturity is not the subject of discussion at the moment. What happened once Harry stunned them?"

Still red from the insult, Draco spoke quickly.

"It was creepy. He said we should teach her a lesson. He wanted to-to take her, and lock her up in the Chamber of Secrets. Said we could obliviate her afterward"

"But he did nothing?"

"Only cause Theo and I said no! If we had agreed, or if he was alone, I don't know what would have happened. Merlin, the way he was looking at her" Draco shivered.

"How has Miss Parkinson been?

"Theo says she's scared of him. I've been watching her. I think he's right"

"Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Draco. I'll speak to him"

"You won't," Draco said hesitantly, "you won't tell him I told you this stuff, right?"

"Do you think me an imbecile?"

"Sorry, sorry, sir"

Snape watched Draco leave his office.

He sighed.

' _It seems I need to have another chat with Harry. I wonder how he'll take to Black'_

A sneer crossed Snape's face at the thought.

* * *

It seemed even magical hospitals carried the same antiseptic smell. Harry had only been to a real muggle hospital once when one of the kids in the orphanage had been diagnosed with leukemia.

' _What was his name? Jacob? No, it was Paul'_

That was it. Of course, Mrs. Spruce had decided it would really cheer the kid up for the whole orphanage to show up.

' _I wonder if it did cheer him up? Make him feel like he had a family?'_

They only visited the one time. In the orphanage, there wasn't much attention given to each kid. So no-one noticed when Paul started getting sick. By the time his complaints were taken seriously, it was too late to do anything.

' _What was it, two weeks later? At least they didn't make us go to his funeral. Fucking muggles. Don't even really care for their own kids'_

The magical hospital didn't have those fluorescent lights at least. Or that crappy linoleum flooring.

"Was wondering when you'd show up, Moony. Thought you'd-"

Sirius stopped speaking abruptly, making an odd choking noise. His eyes widened, and in the most broken voice Harry had ever heard, he said "James"

Lupin gripped Harry's shoulder tightly, steadying himself.

"It's Harry, Sirius."

Sirius didn't move his eyes an inch, just carried on staring intently at Harry.

"Harry. You-you look just like him"

' _Except I've got my mother's eyes'_ Harry thought, holding back a snort.

"I. I watched you play. Quidditch. Just like him. Just like J-James"

' _Mordred's balls. Were you in love with him or something?'_

"He is, isn't he?" Lupin said. "Chaser too"

Sirius finally moved his head, pulling a heavy tension off of Harry.

"You-you watched?"

"I teach there. Defense Against The Dark Arts. How could I not watch? Although it felt weird supporting Slytherin, I'll tell you that"

"Slytherin?" Black looked exceptionally confused at that.

"Harry's in Slytherin"

Harry was not expecting Black to erupt in laughter at that.

"Merlin, that's brilliant! Your parents are probably rolling in their graves"

Something twisted in Harry's chest as he watched the man laugh. He noticed Lupin letting out a very relieved breath next to him.

"Where've you been living?" Sirius asked suddenly.

' _Definitely crazy. Going from shaking his bed with laughter to asking questions with no pause in between. That's not normal'_

"I-grew up in an orphanage. But I've been spending break at the Malfoys"

"The Malfoys?"

"Lucius and Narcissa?"

Black looked torn between outrage and horror. "Why?" He rasped, "Why would you stay with them?"

Lupin coughed delicately. "Harry and their son are very good friends"

Black Just goggled. Then he laughed again.

"Gods, you've been living at cousin Cissy's house. That's just-"

And he was off again, laughing like a loon.

"Whew," he said, wiping the tears out of his eyes. "That's too brilliant. Any girls in your life?"

"Yup"

Sirius grinned widely. "That's it. Just remember, the contraceptive charm has to be done before you start fu-"

"Sirius!"

"What?" He said innocently. "It was his grandfather who gave me that advice"

"I don't think he phrased it quite like that"

"Maybe. Although old Fleamont could really let loose when you got some firewhiskey in him. I remember this one time, James and I-"

And then he was crying, weeping almost as hysterically as he had been laughing.

A hand shot out from under his blanket and gripped Harry's left wrist. Harry drew his wand immediately.

"I-I left you! I shouldn't have! I'm so sorry Harry! I shouldn't have"

He let go of Harry's wrist, and Harry seized the moment to take a step back.

"I should have stayed, should have guarded you! But I had to chase down Peter, I just had to! I should have"

' _Fucking right you should have! It's your fault almost as much as Dumbledore's'_

"I'll make it up to you, I swear! When you live with me. You shouldn't live with me, you should be living with James and Lily!"

His howls drew a team of healers who came rushing into the room. While two of them bent over Sirius and held him down, the third just watched for a minute, before he pulled a potion off of his belt.

"Here Mr. Black. This will help. Drink"

Sirius did, gulping the potion down greedily. Seconds later, his thrashing stopped.

"Mr. Lupin, Mr. Potter. Would you mind telling us what happened?"

' _He's an absolute lunatic'_

"He was talking, quite coherently. Then he just started crying and wailing, and apologizing to Harry. And to his parents"

The healer looked at the parchment in his hands.

"Hmm. Well, all I can say is that after his stay in Azkaban, sudden mood changes are not unexpected. Mr. Potter, perhaps you shouldn't come back for another month. Just give us some time to work with him"

' _The longer the better'_

"Mr. Lupin. I think you visiting could be quite healthy, but not too often. I would say no more than twice a week, for half an hour a time. At least for the first month. We can reassess the situation then"

"Are you sure? I mean-"

"He's been in isolation for the last twelve years. As strange as it may sound, too much human contact at this time could be detrimental to him. He needs to slowly come back to himself"

"How long?" Lupin said. "Until he's normal?"

The healer sighed. "It's hard to say. I highly doubt he will ever be back to how he was before Azkaban, but I would say three months until he can be released. Probably another few months after that until he can be truly functional. He'll be on a potions regiment for a long time though"

"Thank you"

"How long until he can get custody of me?"

' _They probably think I'm eager. Well, fuck them too'_

The healer looked at Harry with pity. "Six months to a year, I would say. I can't make guesses about this type of thing. It could end up being much longer than that. It all depends on his strength of will"

* * *

"How have you been lately?"

"In terms of?"

"In terms of your ...urges, shall we say?"

Harry resolutely did not look Snape in the eyes.

"Bad" he eventually admitted.

"How so?"

"I've wanted to do a lot of of-bad stuff. Come very close to doing some of it"

Snape watched him carefully.

"And have you been cl-"

"Yes, I've been clearing my mind. Hundreds of fucking times a day. For all the good that does"

"Don't interrupt me"

"Sorry"

"Only apologize when you actually mean it"

Harry rolled his eyes.

"When you say it doesn't help, what exactly do you mean?"

"It only helps right then. Ten minutes later, I'm back to square one"

Harry looked down, and when he next spoke, it was barely above a whisper.

"And it's getting worse"

"How so?"

"More often. Stronger. And I don't know what to do. It-I think I'm going crazy"

"You are not"

Harry jerked his head up. "Really? Normal people don't think about doing the things I want to. They don't think about-about"

He trailed off. Snape raised an eyebrow. "They don't think about?"

"Stuff" Harry muttered.

"That may be true. But were those so-called normal people in your position, they would be. And Harry. You are not normal. You are far above normal people. You have greater possibility then them, so you face greater challenges"

"I have no idea how to keep going without failing"

Snape sighed. He'd been waiting for Harry to say something like that.

"When your Occlumency improves, it will make more of a difference" he raised a hand, causing Harry to shut his mouth. "At the moment, you can clear your mind and push your emotions aside momentarily. Once you have proceeded far enough in your Occlumency, you will be able to keep your mind clear at almost all times, without even focusing on it. But you will not be at that stage for a while"

"So what do I do?"

"What do you enjoy doing?"

That question totally blindsided him.

"I, uh"

"Let me rephrase that. What do you like doing that is not seen as immoral?"

"Flying. And reading. And hanging out with my friends"

"Why don't you do that, then? Take some time, every day, just to fly. Not in Quidditch, not in training. Just fly. Purely because you like doing it. And read something simply because you enjoy it, something not as part of your curriculum or training"

"When? It's not like I'm sitting around doing nothing all day"

"I didn't say you were. But you need it. It will help you blow off steam in a healthy way. Make time. You need it"

"I'll try"

"Harry, I cannot impress the importance of this upon you enough. You-"

"I said I'll try, ok?!"

Harry breathed deeply for a minute and unclenched his fists.

"Sorry"

"Try. Let me know how it goes. Even over the break, take some time for yourself every day. We will discuss this again at a later point"

"Yeah, fine"

Harry stood up to leave.

"I haven't finished marking your year's exams yet. However, so far you are in the top few. Keep it that way"

"Thanks," Harry said, walking out.

Snape watched him go.

' _Maybe. Maybe this will work. It is definitely better than the last bit of advice I gave him. Maybe I can hope the Dark Lord will not push him over the summer'_

His lip curled in a bitter smile. Apparently, the part of him that still hoped for good fortune wasn't quite dead yet.

 **AS ALWAYS: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW**

 **JUST THE EPILOGUE LEFT, AND THEN THIS YEAR IS DONE**


	22. Epilogue

**AN: I OWN NOTHING**

 **PLEASE REVIEW/P.M ME**

 **ENJOY**

Epilogue

"So, Harry. As Lucius doubtless has informed you, he will be meeting with a reporter soon"

Harry looked up, into his lord's gleaming eyes.

"He did, my lord"

"You mentioned, did you not, that there were events in your childhood that you would not like to be elaborated on?"

Harry nodded.

"Then you should tell Lucius"

"I-I. I killed two of the muggles. I don't want that coming out"

Lucius nodded. He was aware of Harry having killed one, by two? That was news to him.

"And-and I don't want it published. How the one treated me"

"What did he do?"

Harry looked back at the Dark Lord and averted his gaze.

"He-he did stuff to me"

"And how is Lucius to know what the reporter must not publish exactly?"

"Mr. Roberts. Just tell the reporter not to publish anything about Mr. Roberts"

"Harry"

Lucius had never heard the Dark Lord speak in such a gentle, loving tone.

"The more the wizarding world understand how terrible muggles are, the better our position will be"

Harry didn't say anything, didn't even look up.

"In fact, if the way you were treated comes to light, it would provide a perfect opportunity for you to take your revenge. If that place burned down a few days after the horrors it caused were made public knowledge, people would happily believe that it was someone who wanted to take revenge for the way their savior was treated"

Harry looked up, finally.

"I don't want to be looked at with pity. With...disgust" he all but whispered.

"And why would that happen?" The Dark Lord asked, but a horrible suspicion was dawning in Lucius' mind.

"Because-because he raped me"

Lucius' fist tightened around his cane. The Dark Lord seemed utterly unaffected by this.

"Harry. The choice is entirely yours. I appreciate why you don't want this to be published, just as you surely appreciate why I would like it to be. If you wish, I will personally accompany you to pay your respects to your childhood home"

Harry was silent for a long while.

Eventually, he spoke, voice cracking as he did. "Just-don't let them say that I had anything to do with his death. They can say he killed himself, but that's it"

Dark triumph roared in the Dark Lord's eyes.

"And I would like to visit it, my lord. One last time"

The Dark Lord smiled. "Excellent" he hissed.

* * *

As Harry was discussing the upcoming article with Lucius and the Dark Lord, Maeve Parkinson was clasping hands with her daughter.

Lance held his wand over their linked arms and grimaced.

"And do you swear, to never tell anyone what your father and I will now discuss with you, until such time as I absolve you of your Vow? To not discuss it with anyone other than your father and I, until such time as I absolve you of your Vow?"

Pansy gritted her teeth.

"I do"

A line of flame encircled their hands.

* * *

As Maeve Parkinson told her daughter news that made her shake with fear, Theo Nott's father was leading him to their home's cellar.

A bound and gagged muggle awaited him.

"You are not going to only cast these spells on a muggle at your initiation. I need to see that you can do it"

Theo could barely tear his eyes away from the pitiful form before him.

"Dad, I don't- I don't know if-"

"You don't know what? If you're strong enough to do what needs to be done?"

Theo gulped. He could feel his father's gaze boring into him. He raised his wand.

* * *

As Theo Nott showered, retching and crying, Igor Karkaroff met with one of his sixth-year students. He wished to see where the boy, one Oskar Poliakoff was standing with regards to an offer that had been made to him.

* * *

As Oskar Poliakoff announced his desire to join the Death Eaters, Fenrir Greyback raved in front of a small crowd of werewolves. He spoke passionately, bits of foam flying from his lips, telling of the glories they would see once the Dark Lord had conquered. He ranted about how werewolves were treated by the wizarding world, how they were denied jobs, denied housing, denied food.

* * *

As a pack of werewolves howled, Albus Dumbledore composed a letter to an old friend. As usual, the post for Defence Against the Dark Arts was in need of being filled. He wanted someone he could trust, someone who could hold their own in a fight.

Someone paranoid enough to see hints of Voldemort's return where even Albus was coming up dry.

* * *

As Albus Dumbledore finished his letter to Alastor Moody, a wizard named Cuthbert Yates was finishing his own writings. For weeks and weeks, he had been compiling everything he could about Azkaban Prison, and he would shortly be returned to England for a few months before he had to come back to Hell.

* * *

Spun by dozens of individuals in dozens of locations, the Dark Lord's web was tightening. The chain grew, link by link. Soon, the time would be ripe for the web to drop, for the chain to lock into place. Soon, the Dark Lord would strike.

And when he did, the world would tremble.

 **AS ALWAYS: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW.**

 **YEAR 4 SHOULD BEGIN BEING POSTED SHORTLY**

 **UNTIL THEN**


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